The Worst of 2012 - Bad Movies and Disappointments...

by riverman211179 | created - 22 Apr 2012 | updated - 06 Mar 2013 | Public

Movies to avoid in 2012. Top is to avoid at all costs, bottom is bad surprises or disappointments.

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1. Highway to Hell (2012 Video)

94 min | Comedy, Horror, Musical

The Stranger, a tall striking creature dressed in white sets into motions a series of events while reciting the Edgar Allen Poe Poem "Eldorado", which will have an effect on those heading ... See full summary »

Director: Richard Driscoll | Stars: Richard Driscoll, Daryl Hannah, Peter O'Toole, David Carradine

Votes: 354

Nothing to save in this one. The essence of bad taste. Just impossible to watch...

2. Clash of the Empires (2012 Video)

Not Rated | 87 min | Action, Adventure, Fantasy

In an age long ago, the last village of clever, peace-loving Hobbits is attacked and enslaved by the Java Men, komodo-worshiping, dragon-riding cannibals. Now the young Hobbit Goben, along ... See full summary »

Director: Joseph J. Lawson | Stars: Bai Ling, Sun Korng, Srogn, Khom Lyly

Votes: 877

I have seen so many bad movies in my life... and still kept watching 90 % of them until the end. This one is an exception. I couldn't force myself to watch for more than 15 minutes...

3. Nazis at the Center of the Earth (2012 Video)

R | 89 min | Action, Adventure, Comedy

Researchers in Antarctica are abducted by a team of masked storm troopers. They are dragged deep underground to a hidden continent in the center of the earth. Here Nazi survivors, their ... See full summary »

Director: Joseph J. Lawson | Stars: Dominique Swain, Jake Busey, Joshua Michael Allen, Christopher Karl Johnson

Votes: 3,410

If you like gory stupid movies about Nazis, well, you'll enjoy this one. But give me back the old gore sexploitation movies of the '70. At least they know how to be good at being bad...

4. All Dark Places (2012)

TV-14 | 85 min | Horror, Thriller

Jamie and Christian are giving their marriage one last shot for the sake of love and their young son, Dylan. But when Christian proves unable to hold up his end, forces both within and outside their relationship will decide their future.

Director: Nicholas Reiner | Stars: Josh Burrow, Stephanie Fieger, Daniel Brennan, Tim Douglas

Votes: 222

I have nothing to say about this one. Nothing. *Sigh*.

5. Bad Karma (2012)

R | 87 min | Thriller

Reformed criminal gets blackmailed into doing one last job when former partner crawls out of the woodwork.

Director: Suri Krishnamma | Stars: Ray Liotta, Dominic Purcell, Aaron Pedersen, Andy McPhee

Votes: 908

Bad acting, bad movie.

6. Area 407 (2012)

Not Rated | 90 min | Horror, Sci-Fi, Thriller

Survivors of an airplane crash find themselves within the borders of a government testing area and pursued by predators.

Directors: Dale Fabrigar, Everette Wallin | Stars: Abigail Schrader, Samantha Lester, James Lyons, Melanie Lyons

Votes: 3,521

Trying to play one the "Cloverfield" track. But a bad, pale copy.

7. Strippers vs Werewolves (2012)

93 min | Action, Comedy, Crime

When werewolf Mickey is accidentally killed in a strip club, the girls who work there have until the next full moon before his bloodthirsty wolf pack seek murderous retribution.

Director: Jonathan Glendening | Stars: Adele Silva, Martin Compston, Billy Murray, Ali Bastian

Votes: 1,852

Well, don't be fooled by the title. The strippers are awful and the werewolves are lousy kittens.

8. Tornado Warning (2012 TV Movie)

90 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

Extraterrestrials appear as destructive "electrical tornadoes" on Earth.

Director: Jeff Burr | Stars: Stacey Asaro, Marcus Lyle Brown, Claire Conti, Jeff Fahey

Votes: 918

Bad.

10. 30 Beats (2012)

R | 88 min | Comedy, Romance

20 Metascore

A summer heat wave and a series of sexual encounters connect a group of New Yorkers.

Director: Alexis Lloyd | Stars: Condola Rashad, Justin Kirk, Jennifer Tilly, Jason Day

Votes: 882 | Gross: $0.01M

Plain. Vacuum made as a movie.

11. King Kelly (2012)

Not Rated | 84 min | Drama

66 Metascore

King Kelly is the online username of Kelly, a young girl from Long Island, NY who dreams of becoming famous through her webcam strip tease show. Obsessed with the prospect of celebrity, Kelly stops at nothing to get what she wants.

Director: Andrew Neel | Stars: Louisa Krause, Libby Woodbridge, Roderick Hill, Will Brill

Votes: 510

Not as awful as the top of the list... but bad taste all along...

12. The Apparition (2012)

PG-13 | 82 min | Horror, Thriller

18 Metascore

A couple is haunted by a supernatural presence that is unleashed during a college experiment.

Director: Todd Lincoln | Stars: Ashley Greene, Sebastian Stan, Tom Felton, Julianna Guill

Votes: 18,348 | Gross: $4.93M

No thrills, no chills. Nothing new. Already done a 1000 times. And better.

13. Night of the Templar (2013)

101 min | Horror, Mystery

Medieval knight Lord Gregoire, who has been betrayed by his own advisor and warriors for an abundance of gold and riches, vows that after these traitors revel in ten life-times of excess, he will have his bloody revenge.

Director: Paul Sampson | Stars: Paul Sampson, David Carradine, Udo Kier, Norman Reedus

Votes: 5,405

What was this, exactly?

14. Iron Sky (2012)

R | 93 min | Action, Comedy, Sci-Fi

The Nazis set up a secret base on the dark side of the moon in 1945 where they hide out and plan to return to power in 2018.

Director: Timo Vuorensola | Stars: Julia Dietze, Christopher Kirby, Götz Otto, Udo Kier

Votes: 88,673

Silly. But if it's able to make you laugh...

15. Bindlestiffs (2012)

R | 80 min | Action, Adventure, Comedy

Three high school virgins, suspended from school on a bogus graffiti charge, flee to the inner city in an attempt to live out the plot of The Catcher in the Rye - a book they neither have ... See full summary »

Director: Andrew Edison | Stars: John Karna, Luke Loftin, Andrew Edison, Will Fordyce

Votes: 550

Nothing to say. *Re-sigh"...

16. 7 Below (2012)

R | 90 min | Horror

A group of strangers trapped in a time warp house where a terrible event transpired exactly 100 years prior.

Director: Kevin Carraway | Stars: Val Kilmer, Ving Rhames, Luke Goss, Matt Barr

Votes: 3,776

The big question is: does Val Kilmer read the scripts of the movies he's about to play in?

17. Wyatt Earp's Revenge (2012 Video)

PG-13 | 93 min | Drama, Western

Story of a young Wyatt Earp before he became a lawman. When someone important to him is killed he sets out to find the one responsible. He is joined by some friends among whom are Bat Masterson and Doc Holliday.

Director: Michael Feifer | Stars: Val Kilmer, Shawn Roberts, Daniel Booko, Matt Dallas

Votes: 1,608

I never thought a Western could be so boring.

18. Breathless (I) (2012)

R | 92 min | Comedy, Thriller

After killing her bank-robber husband, a Texas housewife must dispose of the body and find the loot while avoiding the local sheriff.

Director: Jesse Baget | Stars: Gina Gershon, Val Kilmer, Kelli Giddish, Ray Liotta

Votes: 1,256

I don't even remember it.

19. Chernobyl Diaries (2012)

R | 86 min | Horror, Mystery, Thriller

Six tourists hire an extreme tour guide who takes them to the abandoned city Pripyat, the former home to the workers of the Chernobyl nuclear reactor. During their exploration, they soon discover they are not alone.

Director: Bradley Parker | Stars: Jesse McCartney, Jonathan Sadowski, Olivia Taylor Dudley, Nathan Phillips

Votes: 61,693 | Gross: $18.12M

Once again, the "Cloverfield" disease. Pretty lame movie.

20. Storage 24 (2012)

R | 87 min | Action, Horror, Mystery

52 Metascore

In London, a military plane crashes leaving its highly classified contents strewn across the city. Completely unaware that the city is in lockdown, a group of people become trapped inside a storage facility with a highly unwelcome guest.

Director: Johannes Roberts | Stars: Noel Clarke, Colin O'Donoghue, Antonia Campbell-Hughes, Laura Haddock

Votes: 6,302

A waste of time.

21. Silent Hill: Revelation (2012)

R | 95 min | Horror

16 Metascore

When her adoptive father disappears, Sharon Da Silva is drawn into a strange and terrifying alternate reality that holds answers to the horrific nightmares that have plagued her since childhood.

Director: M.J. Bassett | Stars: Adelaide Clemens, Kit Harington, Sean Bean, Carrie-Anne Moss

Votes: 57,731 | Gross: $17.53M

I slightly enjoyed the first opus. This one is just useless.

22. Goats (2012)

R | 94 min | Comedy

38 Metascore

As Ellis prepares to leave Tucson for his freshman year at an East Coast prep school, he also faces separating from his flaky, new age mother and the only real father he has ever known: Goat Man.

Director: Christopher Neil | Stars: David Duchovny, Vera Farmiga, Graham Phillips, Justin Kirk

Votes: 4,818

23. Casa de mi Padre (2012)

R | 84 min | Comedy, Western

52 Metascore

Scheming on a way to save their father's ranch, the Alvarez brothers find themselves in a war with Mexico's most feared drug lord.

Director: Matt Piedmont | Stars: Will Ferrell, Gael García Bernal, Diego Luna, Nick Offerman

Votes: 19,355 | Gross: $5.90M

Sometimes, the parody is actually much more vain than the genre it is mocking.

24. House at the End of the Street (2012)

PG-13 | 101 min | Drama, Horror, Thriller

31 Metascore

After moving with her mother to a small town, a teenager finds that an accident happened in the house at the end of the street. Things get more complicated when she befriends a boy who was the only survivor of the accident.

Director: Mark Tonderai | Stars: Jennifer Lawrence, Elisabeth Shue, Max Thieriot, Gil Bellows

Votes: 67,346 | Gross: $31.61M

25. The Scorpion King 3: Battle for Redemption (2012 Video)

PG-13 | 105 min | Action, Adventure, Fantasy

Since his rise to power, Mathayus' kingdom has fallen. Now an assassin for hire, he must defend a kingdom from an evil tyrant and his ghost warriors for the chance to regain the power and glory he once knew.

Director: Roel Reiné | Stars: Dave Bautista, Bostin Christopher, Tanapol Chuksrida, Kevin 'Kimbo Slice' Ferguson

Votes: 7,438

Time to end this agony.

26. Chronicle (2012)

PG-13 | 84 min | Drama, Sci-Fi, Thriller

69 Metascore

Three high school friends gain superpowers after making an incredible discovery underground. Soon they find their lives spinning out of control and their bond tested as they embrace their darker sides.

Director: Josh Trank | Stars: Dane DeHaan, Alex Russell, Michael B. Jordan, Michael Kelly

Votes: 231,926 | Gross: $64.58M

So many good reviews for that movie... Why? It doesn't bring anything new. The story is awful, the characters uninteresting. You almost wish they could die faster to ease your pain.

27. ATM (I) (2012)

R | 90 min | Horror, Thriller

34 Metascore

On a late night visit to an ATM, three co-workers end up in a desperate fight for their lives when they become trapped by an unknown man.

Director: David Brooks | Stars: Alice Eve, Josh Peck, Brian Geraghty, Mike O'Brian

Votes: 21,899 | Gross: $0.00M

Why would someone make such a stupid movie?

28. Red Dawn (2012)

PG-13 | 93 min | Action, Adventure, Crime

31 Metascore

A group of teenagers look to save their town from an invasion of North Korean soldiers.

Director: Dan Bradley | Stars: Chris Hemsworth, Isabel Lucas, Josh Hutcherson, Josh Peck

Votes: 70,568 | Gross: $44.81M

Hahahahahaha. The original was fun and okay, with young decent actors at that time. This one is a real mess on all levels. The idea in itself is a total aberration. Just completely unbelievable and stupid.

29. The Baytown Outlaws (2012)

R | 98 min | Action, Comedy, Crime

33 Metascore

When three redneck brothers agree to help a woman save her godson from an abusive stepfather, they become targets on the run from an odd cast of characters.

Director: Barry Battles | Stars: Billy Bob Thornton, Eva Longoria, Thomas Brodie-Sangster, Clayne Crawford

Votes: 13,176

30. The Man with the Iron Fists (2012)

R | 95 min | Action

51 Metascore

On the hunt for a fabled treasure of gold, a band of warriors, assassins, and a rogue British soldier descend upon a village in feudal China, where a humble blacksmith looks to defend himself and his fellow villagers.

Director: RZA | Stars: Russell Crowe, Cung Le, Lucy Liu, RZA

Votes: 58,827 | Gross: $15.63M

Chinese action scenes with rap music and an Australian actor. Best cocktail to get the fastest headache ever.

31. Project X (2012)

R | 88 min | Comedy

48 Metascore

3 high school seniors throw a birthday party to make a name for themselves. As the night progresses, things spiral out of control as word of the party spreads.

Director: Nima Nourizadeh | Stars: Thomas Mann, Oliver Cooper, Jonathan Daniel Brown, Dax Flame

Votes: 180,610 | Gross: $54.73M

Silly movie. Uninteresting story. Unless you are a kid, probably.

32. Cosmopolis (2012)

R | 109 min | Crime, Drama, Fantasy

58 Metascore

Riding across Manhattan in a stretch limo in order to get a haircut, a 28-year-old billionaire asset manager's day devolves into an odyssey with a cast of characters that start to tear his world apart.

Director: David Cronenberg | Stars: Robert Pattinson, Juliette Binoche, Sarah Gadon, Mathieu Amalric

Votes: 42,440 | Gross: $0.74M

The most boring and pompous movie of David Cronenberg, one of my favorite directors. Cheap post-modern philosophy.

33. About Cherry (2012)

R | 98 min | Drama

33 Metascore

A troubled young woman moves to San Francisco, where she becomes involved in pornography and aligns herself with a cocaine-addicted lawyer.

Director: Stephen Elliott | Stars: Ashley Hinshaw, James Franco, Heather Graham, Lili Taylor

Votes: 9,312 | Gross: $0.00M

Very decent idea, but a boring movie.

34. Not Suitable for Children (2012)

R | 97 min | Comedy, Romance

A young playboy who learns he has one month until he becomes infertile sets out to procreate as much as possible.

Director: Peter Templeman | Stars: Ryan Kwanten, Sarah Snook, Ryan Corr, Bojana Novakovic

Votes: 4,774

Ryan Kwanten can act, it's been proven in "True Blood". So: Why?

35. Wanderlust (2012)

R | 98 min | Comedy, Romance

53 Metascore

Rattled by sudden unemployment, a Manhattan couple surveys alternative living options, ultimately deciding to experiment with living on a rural commune where free love rules.

Director: David Wain | Stars: Jennifer Aniston, Paul Rudd, Malin Akerman, Justin Theroux

Votes: 70,032 | Gross: $17.23M

Flop comedy could have been much better given the original idea and the cast. Too bad.

36. Red Lights (2012)

R | 114 min | Drama, Fantasy, Horror

36 Metascore

Psychologist Margaret Matheson and her assistant study paranormal activity, which leads them to investigate a world-renowned psychic who has resurfaced years after his toughest critic mysteriously passed away.

Director: Rodrigo Cortés | Stars: Sigourney Weaver, Robert De Niro, Cillian Murphy, Elizabeth Olsen

Votes: 56,037 | Gross: $0.05M

How can a movie starring Cillian Murphy and Sigourney Weaver be so plain and uninteresting? This is the veritable magic/tour de force.

PS: Can someone tell Robert De Niro to stop acting?

37. Columbus Circle (2012)

PG-13 | 82 min | Crime, Drama, Mystery

An heiress who's been shut inside her apartment building for nearly two decades is forced to confront her fears after one of her neighbors is killed and a detective arrives to begin the investigation.

Director: George Gallo | Stars: Selma Blair, Amy Smart, Kevin Pollak, Jason Antoon

Votes: 9,981

Awful movie - despite decent acting.

38. Wrath of the Titans (2012)

PG-13 | 99 min | Action, Adventure, Fantasy

37 Metascore

Perseus braves the treacherous underworld to rescue his father, Zeus, captured by his son, Ares, and brother Hades who unleash the ancient Titans upon the world.

Director: Jonathan Liebesman | Stars: Sam Worthington, Liam Neeson, Rosamund Pike, Ralph Fiennes

Votes: 174,961 | Gross: $83.67M

The first one was already bad. The second is worse. Stop it !

39. Taken 2 (2012)

PG-13 | 92 min | Action, Thriller

45 Metascore

In Istanbul, retired CIA operative Bryan Mills and his wife are taken hostage by the father of a kidnapper Mills killed while rescuing his daughter.

Director: Olivier Megaton | Stars: Liam Neeson, Famke Janssen, Maggie Grace, Leland Orser

Votes: 277,232 | Gross: $139.85M

The first one was a very good action movie with great composition from Liam Neeson. Why do it again - and exactly the same way? Since Luc Besson decided it was all about the money, his artistic flair has totally deserted him.

40. This Is 40 (2012)

R | 134 min | Comedy, Romance

59 Metascore

Pete and Debbie are both about to turn 40, their kids hate each other, both of their businesses are failing, they're on the verge of losing their house, and their relationship is threatening to fall apart.

Director: Judd Apatow | Stars: Paul Rudd, Leslie Mann, Maude Apatow, Iris Apatow

Votes: 120,553 | Gross: $67.54M

41. The Bourne Legacy (2012)

PG-13 | 135 min | Action, Adventure, Thriller

61 Metascore

An expansion of the universe from Robert Ludlum's novels, centered on a new hero whose stakes have been triggered by the events of the previous three films.

Director: Tony Gilroy | Stars: Jeremy Renner, Rachel Weisz, Edward Norton, Scott Glenn

Votes: 272,330 | Gross: $113.20M

Time to stop the series. The first three were very good altogether. And Jeremy Renner deserves much more than this.

42. Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (2012)

R | 105 min | Action, Fantasy, Horror

42 Metascore

Abraham Lincoln, the 16th President of the United States, discovers vampires are planning to take over the United States. He makes it his mission to eliminate them.

Director: Timur Bekmambetov | Stars: Benjamin Walker, Rufus Sewell, Dominic Cooper, Anthony Mackie

Votes: 144,635 | Gross: $37.52M

It was announced as being revolutionary - the new "Matrix"... It was just another mediocre action movie...

43. Freelancers (2012)

R | 96 min | Action, Crime, Drama

The son of a slain NYPD officer joins the force, where he falls in with his father's former partner and a team of rogue cops.

Director: Jessy Terrero | Stars: 50 Cent, Robert De Niro, Forest Whitaker, Malcolm Goodwin

Votes: 9,180

Not so bad. But bad enough. Robert de Niro... how are you picking your movies lately?

44. Dredd (2012)

R | 95 min | Action, Crime, Sci-Fi

60 Metascore

In a violent, futuristic city where the police have the authority to act as judge, jury and executioner, a cop teams with a trainee to take down a gang that deals the reality-altering drug, SLO-MO.

Director: Pete Travis | Stars: Karl Urban, Olivia Thirlby, Lena Headey, Rachel Wood

Votes: 238,668 | Gross: $13.41M

I know the aficionados of the genre will disagree. But it's sad to make such a movie for such a limited audience. I just couldn't wait for it to end.



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