1400 films accomplished.

I haven't written one of these in a while, expect some BS.

First I'd like to address the trailers, Hmm... I only remember the one, I guess I wasn't the only one in this boat. The audience gave some positive hype to it, the Youngin's are into it, I smell new life blood for Godzilla. For me personally, I wanted to cry because it was best thing I've experienced in a while, can't wait.

So now the film, it's Meh. It wasn't a total waste of money, but also wasn't money well spent. I'm only 18, it didn't effect me, but it effected the grown adult audience, that's not good. The two characters had only one set of emotions each. The sister was obsessed, the brother was snivelling. The beginning was boring, the middle got my attention, the 3rd act lost me completely. The two time lines running parallel was just awe-full, just show us what happens and stop trying to seem cool and brilliant, it sucks. There was no suspense or scares, or intelligent scares. Instead it used painful violence to try to put you at unease. And the whole unhappy ending, protagonist losing bit just doesn't work anymore. Same goes for the happy ending/fake out ending. The only way to get a solid reaction is to go out hard-core like.

Ghosts/scares: Sub par generic I guess, I mean I forget them already. The only part that came close to being disturbing was the mom being mutilated and chained up like a dog, but literally half a second later, and we see she is just possessed by a demon and has the intelligence of a house fly. Way to ruin that scare, I thought that was going to be some hard core stuff right there.

So that's Oculus... I think, I don't know I already forget it. It's a bad year for horror and this is the best so far, but the Godzilla trailer was awesome, go pay ten dollars to see that trailer on the big screen.

The more I watch this film, and the more modern action movies I see, I have to say this film is one of the best in the last ten years. Most action movies now are just dumbed down to a common level, with actors you don't remember, even SLY and Arnold's latest films were terrible. But this film just works, the setting, the visuals, the violent world with no hope for peace, and of course Dredd laying down the law. It's not over the top and goofy or in your face like Fast 5 or something. There's no dumb comedy reliefs, instead it's very subtle, most of which coming from Dredds reactions to his surroundings and his attitude. The action is well paced, the world is dark, the characters are believable, it all fits nicely. And there is no happy ending, just another day on the job, tomorrow will be the same, but Dredd will always lay down the law. This will be remembered as a classic, in time though.

Godzilla says this movie sucks, and so do I.

So this is apparently a remake of some soft core porno, you know the industry stooped low when they are remaking porn. This movie is very boring, maybe it has to do with the one dimensional characters that ooze blandness every time I see them. Maybe it's to do with the fact that the first hour doesn't make any sense. Charlotte has issues, yeah okay. Maybe it has something to do with the WTF Pre credits scene, all I know is the film jumps back and forth between reality and dream land.

All that I got out of this film is college is a pretty gross place, the women are like some torture masters. They haze fresh-mens by forcing them to strip and drink hard liquor, and if they don't comply, they are beaten. And if that's not the worst part, Charlotte is molested by some lesbian rapist, this right here showcases the soft core source material, that and about a dozen other sex and nude scenes. Then she's got this pervert co-worker breathing down her neck, he gets touchy feely and even stalks her. At this point the film showcases how unlikable all of the characters are. So Charlotte succumbs to the basic human need for sex, and lets Chris(her co worker) do the deed. But he gets killed before he can do it, was I supposed to care, I'll admit I laughed a little. At this point in the film it's pretty much twilight with all the love and BS drama between the girls and boys. So when will this end, oh another 20 minutes, I'll just skip to the end. And that's it, she kills the vampire and has a good cry, because she is going to be the new vampire, or something like that.

It's a terrible film straight from Canada, I knew that before the credits ended, it had a Canadian feel to it. I gave it a 1 out of 10, more so because it wasted my time, every thing about it is bad, and it's just a bland and uninteresting story. Gunga Gee Ga Gunga, as Elpresador would say, it's bad.

So I'm guessing this was remade because the of the surge of teen bullying that is going on in the news, so they thought it was time for an update. Too bad they didn't update it one bit huh. You know, they should have remade it, instead of following the original in every way shape and from. This is a pointless film, why was it made. They reuse the same scenes, same dialogue, no matter how goofy and dated it is. What was the deal with them putting that montage in this film, why would they put that in there.

The teenagers in this film are so Hollywood, Chris is like the god*amn devil, she is evil incarnate. And the whole prom theme, do the kids even care about that in this day and age, I don't know that's an American thing. And the whole teacher bullying Carrie, is this for real, I have never ever seen a teacher bully or allow bullying to a student. Every single thing in this film is complete garbage, except our two leads. Mortez was very good as Carrie, but the problem with that is, she pretty much just copied Sissy Spacek's performance. She was good, but I have seen it done before, and much better at that. But I still did feel her pain, and felt bad about what happened to her. Her reaction to Tommy dying was much better here, than it was in the original. I never much cared for Mortez before, and never understood why people liked her, but considering this is the first time she has ever given a good performance, I don't have a problem with her anymore. But the one who steals the show is Julianne Moore, she surpasses the original Margret White in my opinion. When she first appeared at the school after the incident, I could just feel her presence. The gym teacher was much weaker in this film, she didn't sit right with me.

Overall, the film is very disappointing, they had a huge opportunity to update this properly to fit with modern society. But no, it plays out as if it were still in the 70's. It has it's high and lows, but it was enjoyable. But the reality is, you could just stay at home and the original, or the tormented, or anything about this subject matter for dirt cheap.

I was surprised about how much people praise this film, I just finished viewing it, and I'm not that impressed. "Well you just didn't get the superb plot". Oh I got it, I just think it's stupid. Ayana somehow lifts a immovable stone, which causes some tentacle monster to hatch. So she raises it with the intent of sending it after Gamera. Was I supposed feel some sort of emotion when the characters and story progress. One, Iris looks cool, but frankly isn't a huge threat. Maybe for a little kid Iris will stir up some tension, but I didn't see any danger. And I was right, because he just gets his stomach ripped open in one punch, and is down for the count.

The plot was very sub par for a trilogy final. This film pretty much goes like this: 40 minutes of set up, 1 hour and 20 minutes until some thing happens, and 1 hour and 47 minutes of MEH-NESS. Seriously, you wait almost an hour and a half for like 2 minutes worth of monster fighting. What's the point of them putting three different monsters in this film, and have no fight scenes. It feels almost like they wanted to make a good movie, instead of a monster movie, I watched this to see monsters blow sh-t up, not some BS revenge story that is completely ridiculous.

I feel as if I should address the scene where Ayana offers herself. It's like some Japanese hentai. Let me repeat her words " Iris, I'm so hot(as she opens her blouse), what...HAHAHAHAHA? Then Iris grabs her with his tentacles. What was the deal with that, HAHAHAHAHA, I can't stop laughing. Oh yeah, the subtitles for this film are atrocious, you miss half of the dialogue because it doesn't even show up on the screen. But it is nowhere near as bad as the Godzilla vs. Megalon DVD, they pretty much just changed the dialogue for that.

I may not think to highly of this film, but that doesn't mean it's bad, it's actually very well made for a monster movie. But other than the quality, the 90's Godzilla films are much more enjoyable and fun to watch. This film is very violent, I would compare it to Godzilla vs. Destoroyah with the amount of carnage, but this film goes more into graphic detail, which is surprising.

I didn't care about any of the characters, the plot was just fine, there was no action, and it was genuinely unpleasant. But I still recommend watching it you like monster movies.

Short and sweet review: I've been meaning to watch this films for years now, but forgot about it. But turns out it's on ITunes, so I rented it. As far as recent slasher films go, this one is not bad. The plot is idiotic, the characters are worthless and despicable, they really ruffled my spirit, I'm looking at you Serina.

So, we open with Tyler, an obsessed horror fan, researching a lost horror film. His girlfriend comes in, and offers him sex. And like a complete beast, he tells her to go back to bed while he looks at his horror film. This comes into play, and bites him in the ass in a few minutes. Then we are introduced to his best friend, Tyler explains his plans to visit Alexa, the daughter of the director of the lost horror film. So he goes to find her, while his best friend goes to his friends girlfriends house, and then they adulterate. Yeah, guess who I don't want to make it through the film, these two. But that's not it, Serina tries to get the audience to feel sorry for her and root for her. She makes it out that Tyler is the bad guy, and she tries to guilt him. My god, this woman is toxic, she cheats on him, snuggles with his friend right in front of him, and she still eggs him on like they are still having a good relationship. Well she ends up getting it bad in the end. So now Tyler is with Alexa, and baby face is now on the hunt. I like the lost of the doll mask and rotten jaw bone, he means business when he looks you in the eyes. It's strange, they play him off as someone like Jason Voorhees, but he actually speaks, quite eloquently at that. What a curve ball, but he never does it after that moment, it's really strange. The Tyler character was so obsessed with finding this lost film and it's secrets, but when he gets what he wants, he turns into a little Pansy, and changes his mind, and for once shows some concern for his girlfriend who he neglects. The best friend gets killed, baby face gets killed (turns out all you had to do was poke a stick through him, and no one ever tried that before huh). Tyler finally gets to watch his precious lost film. OH, yeah Serina was raped by baby face. So her fate is to be chained up in a barn for nine months until she gives birth to bay faces child. She got the short end of the stick, poor old Serina got it bad.

I can the film was watchable, and I'll probably watch it again in the future. It's worth a watch, it better than the Michael, Jason, and Freddy remakes, that's just sad.

This movie is horrible, the characters are despicable, it's not even scary. Let me tell you the two biggest problems with this film, these two problems that pretty much ruined the whole film.

Problem 1: Kerry, the girlfriend to Brody, and I also guess to Leo too. The first few minutes we see her, I knew she was no good and was sleeping around. That's one thing, but she brings Leo( her other lover) on her boyfriends camping trip. She then continues to ignore Brody, and treat him like he is the bad guy. But that still isn't it, when Brody goes off into the woods, she takes Leo into the tent and begins having sex with him. But little miss prince throws Leo away too. And now she is all mad, and upset. But that still isn't it, when Brody tries to take her safely out of the woods, she stabs him to death, then cries for him to come back. Kerry is one of thee worst female characters in horror history, you just can't wait for her to get her come up-ins, but we don't even get to see it.

Problem 2: There is maybe about two minutes of exposition about the woods, and it isn't even well done. We have no fear, or understanding of what is happening because it doesn't even set up the horror properly. Compare that to The Blair Witch Project, we get tons of background history and stories about the woods, and the witch. We know to be afraid of the woods, and know it is a bad place to be. But here, we don't get jack. This movie focuses more on enraging you over an adulterer girlfriend, so don't care about 2/3rds of the characters, and we have no proper set up. This film fails so hard it's not even funny, I think they added the horror aspect as an after thought.

This movie is just a sad and anger fuelled mess. So as usual, stay away.

Oh my god, this is the most frustrating piece of sh-t I have ever had to sit through. There was at least four different times I just wanted to shut it off, and break something. I'll come right out and say never ever buy this film, even if you could get it for 99 cents, it is not worth that. I'm going to use the R word, even if people get sensitive over it. If you have seen this movie, than you'll understand why.

The actions/characters: The school girl daughter put's her family in danger because she wants to get laid. The son puts his family in danger because he has a 12 IQ. The mother puts the family in danger because she is the most useless piece of sh-t this side of the San Andreas. The father is the only rational one, but even he succumbs to his family's p-ssy face nature. Seriously, they live in a ultra violent world, and all they worry about is green peace. I have never screamed so loud and so viciously at a film in my entire life, but these characters had me pulling out my hair. The whole film centers on them having to hand over a bum to the strangers wannabes, even when they tie the bum up, they cry like babies about it. They would rather die to psychopaths, than hand over some bum they have never seen before. This is a world of Psychopaths, people cut for survival, or wimpy losers. And that whole family were a bunch of babies. They even got involved with a death plot by their neighbours who try to kill them. But the bum comes back and saves them and turns the tide. What do they do, let them walk. Yeah, your destroyed house and dead husband must be thrilled about that choice. That wife needed a good smacking from Ethan Hawke, same with the boy, and the daughter, even that stupid little robot needed some too.

This was the dumbest, most idiotic, piece of trash I have ever seen, and I have watched a lot of Asylum films, wow. And you want to know the worst part about it, there's going to be a sequel. Hands down thee worst main stream horror film of 2013, congratulations. I give it a 0 out of 10 stars.

Dog cam, check. Zombie cam, check. Eyeball cam, check. Garbage film, check.

VHS had it's moments, I liked it. It was a neat little anthology film, but it was a bad movie in every way, shape and form. Well people seemed to like this one, so I thought it was going to be better. But no, people don't know what they are talking about.

Prolouge: We get a weak setup with some private detective filming a overly graphic sex scene. His new assignment, find some introvert that holds obviously doesn't interact with any one, but people seam to know when he is extra reclusive. So these two investigators break into his home, and start watching his VHS tapes for some reason. The script probably took 3 days to write, the actors must have just been pulled off the street. I had Breaking bad playing in the background on AMC, it was good to have on, because this movie was incredibly boring. Here we go.

Segment 1: As soon as this began, I knew the movie was going to suck. Some guy gets a robotic camera eye installed into his head. Little does he know, it will cause him to see dead people. Huh, that sounds familiar, Oh yeah "The Eye" already did that. So this guy hides in the bathroom every time he gets scarred, and the ghosts never go after him in there, and they only show up at night, so he could just sleep in the bathroom. There problem solved guy, or you could just blindfold yourself. But no, he lets some random chick into his house. She blabs about how she has the same problem. Her uncle shows up, and the only way to get rid of him is for her to rape the guy with the camera eye. The second she put hers hands on her clothes, my eyes rolled to the back of my head, of course they had to put this in, whatever. So long story short, they die in a couple of hours, thee end. 1 OUT OF 5.

Segment 2: I kind of liked this one. Zombie cam, it's more of a comedy rather than horror. It had some funny moments, but also had the weakest characters and script. I'll give it a past just on the fact we get to see through the zombies eyes. 3 out of 5.

Segment 3: Frankly I wasn't even paying attention to this for the first half. The second half picked up very well. It had some good moments, but the payoff was laughable. The demon seamed like it was going to be cool, but when they showed it in full, it just some stupid ass goat monster. I give it a 2 out of 5.

Segment 4: Okay, this one was pretty bad, how could they mess up aliens in a secluded area. Well they put dumb kids, tomas the train engine ships, and dog cams in this. The sound quality is terrible, those little kids are disturbed. I felt bad for that poor sister, she gets hit water balloons with piss in them, her brothers are watching her have intercourse with her boyfriend. Incestual brothers are the worst, ask that chick from "The Funhouse". And if that wasn't bad enough, they show some 15 year old kid ******* off to porn. At this point I turned over to the TV, and watched Jessie break down in group therapy. Then they aliens chase them around. Why do aliens want a bunch of kids, who knows. And the segment ends with a dog going splat. Yeah, that was terrible. 0 out of 5.

Epilouge: So the guy they were looking for has become some supernatural being, and kills the two investigators.

Wow, what a pile of garbage. The nudity had been toned way down here, thank you. The violence is even more over the top. Everything else pretty much stayed the same, except for any originality or creativity. Well deserving of a 3 out of 10. It's watchable, but that doesn't mean you'll like what you see.

When I first heard this was coming out, I got a little excited. I love Chucky, and the more Chucky, the more better. These films have always been bad, mostly on purpose. But this film is just plain bad. It tries to actually be a horror film straight up, but that also is the down fall of the whole film. Bride and seed were the height of the character, you wanted him to succeed. But here, I actually didn't like him, wow these writers ****ed up hard. Chucky is my favorite horror character, but I hate him here. He's is not funny, he is certainly not scary. It's a travesty.

The plot sets up a big house with a lot of people in it. You'd think it would have a cozy Friday the 13ish feeling, but no, the characters are all seem to hate each other, and there is little development or interaction. They are lifeless, and don't say they are like that because of the dead mother, she never comes up again after the opening, no one seems to care. The film for the most part is relatively boring, and when Chucky finally does come out to play, he is never likable. The kills are few and far between, they are never worth the wait. Considering I bought the unrated version, I thought it was going to be pretty violent, but no. I don't know, maybe it was for the better, considering horror films these days going over board with the violence. This felt tame like the first three films.

The plot twist, this was another huge gripe with the film. I know Charles Lee Ray was a psychopath, but him wanting to be a family man, what? What about Tiffany, considering how much she liked him, why would he be going after some random middle class family. These flashback scenes really disturb me for some reason, I don't approve of them at all.

The dual endings. The ending for Nica was idiotic. The police believe that a woman in a wheelchair could possible do the things she was charged with, is just stretching the BS to unbelievable lengths. What about Alice, she could vouch for Nika. The fact that they even have the same Chucky doll that has caused so much carnage over the years sitting in the courtroom, and nobody, not one person believes Nika, yeah okay. Then there is the after credits ending for Andy. More of a fan service considering it doesn't make any sense. Before the credits rolled Chucky was transferring his soul into Alice, without the pendant I may add. So did he transfer or not, why was he still a doll when Andy took care of him with a shotgun. Why is Tiffany still working with him, where is Glen during all of this, why doesn't Chucky bleed when he gets hurt. Why? WHY? WHYYY? It's a very bitter disappointment to the franchise. I still recommend viewing it for yourself, to form your own opinion.

Short and sweet review.

I don't get how people think this is a beautiful film, it's stupid and generic as all hell. The characters have been seen before, and done much better as well. The film is just played for laughs, nothing is even remotely realistic. Mostly with Jordan's character, and the BS love story with the stripper. Why would any want to be with a stripper? who knows. The Rachel character was the biggest b**ch any one could create. She dumps Jordan because of unexciting sex, even though that shouldn't even matter in a relationship. She dumps him, then proceeds to do it with ten different people, while she gets jealous of Jordan being with the stripper. They even try to make us feel sorry for her at one point, even though she is downright evil. There were a couple funny moments, but the film was unpleasant for the most part. It's just a mediocre attempt of Canada's version of a Judd Apatow film. 90 percent of the women in this film are portrayed as slutty.

It is pretty mediocre and generic, to the point where it is horrible.

The Wan hype train is rolling through this film, there for it will make a lot of money just because of The Conjuring. I don't hate James Wan d**k ride his films, probably because horror is complete trash now-a-days, and this is the closest thing people see as good horror. But in reality, it's mediocre and nothing special. The Conjuring was a well made film, but it was downright horrible in every other category, including the most important thing, atmosphere/scares. Luckily this film was more of a thriller than it was a horror film, they recycled the exact some scares from the first film. I'll explain.

The plot is alright in the sense that it actually has a thought out story line, even if it is down right stupid at times. All the characters return, even those annoying comic relief paranormal specialists. You can pretty much guess the plot just by watching the trailer, every thing is obvious, except for when they stretch out the BS. There is some time travel nonsense that is just plain ridiculous. Is there infinite realities, is this Bioshock or a ghost movie. It really tries to have this mind bending plot line, but it just had me rolling my eyes. It's about as clever as the swing away twist in Signs, that's pretty bad. The ending should be left as it is, if not, we are looking at the next paranormal activity, the BS will just go on and on, but people will see it. In fact, James Wan could be described as paranormal activity, over hyped, appeals to the masses, even if it completely ruins his films. He makes his films dirt cheap, and wrings in the cash from the general audiences.

The music is still loud as hell, or quiet to the point you can't even hear it. The acting is fine, they get a pass. There is no tension, no good scares or atmosphere. You never feel a sense of urgency, or fear. It is all around horrible as a horror film. But it was pretty entertaining, and just all around fine. You'll roll your eyes more than you'll jump in terror. The story was wrapped up, but that old Hollywood money machine will still be sniffing around this franchise.

I wrote down a bunch of stuff to talk about, but I'm not going to. I will just go over the stuff I liked, with maybe one or two complaints I had.

This may be the best found footage film since [Rec], and that was 2007. Considering how many of these films get made, that is a good accomplishment. The characters aren't fleshed out, some of them hardly say a line, so you really don't care if they die. The biggest drawing point of this film is the monsters, and they are fantastic. They really aren't scary since they are not the most efficient killers. Well when you get surrounded by 12 of them, that does get very intense. I was surprised at how well lite this film was, you could see every single detail, kudos to you filmmaker. The sets are a million times better than any mainstream budget horror film has created in the last ten years. It's a pretty cool facility the doctor runs, comes complete with monsters as your butler. The effects are outstanding, all of the monsters and gore looked incredibly real. No CGI, and who would have thought a horror film would look real. Those are the highlights.

But there was some bad stuff as well. There is absolutely no character development. They have one trait, and thats what they use throughout the film. And of course there is no way a lab like that could be supplied with enough power to run, it's literally in the middle of nowhere. The main characters torture prisoners, kill children, sexual threat and possibly rape women, and destroy property. Our heroes everyone, don't you just care so deeply about them, and want them to live. One lastly, why was there some random woman moaning in the background, it's in the middle of a tense scene and you're distracted by some woman climaxing, what's the deal.

The film is pretty enjoyable, and a god send of found footage films. It wasn't as violent as I thought it would be, but still has some good gross outs. I recommend it.