The Witches (1990)
10/10
This movie is not just a Halloween classic, but a CLASSIC in every way possible.
25 February 2008
Warning: Spoilers
This movie is not just a Halloween classic, but a CLASSIC in every way possible. This is one of only two movies i still own on VHS (the other is The Crocodile Hunter: Collision Course, but that doesn't really need to be explained does it?).

I have seen this movie more times than I can count, so many in fact that the original VHS cartridge became worn out, the tape was transferred into another cartridge, then years later retaped on to a new tape to hold off the film from degrading further. This year I think I am finally going to force my lazy ass to get it on DVD.

This movie is about an American kid who's parents die and he is sent to live with his granny in England. Soon the kid discovers that Angelica Huston apparently finds children stinky and wants to eliminate them all by buying up candy shops and selling goodies tainted (ha ha ha taint) with "Formula 86″ that turns kids into mice. Now maybe it's just me, but as I watch this film as an adult I always want to tell Angelica Huston that if she really wanted to wipe those kids out she should have laced the chocolate with Anthrax and kill them outright rather then turn them into mice. Hell if she doesn't want to kill them why not just lace the goodies with herpes? Any way, The kid a.k.a. Luke and his crazy old granny (who apparently knows a ton about witches) are hanging out in this hotel where the witches are having a convention about snuffing out kids when he discovers their plans. After witnessing his fatty boom batty friend Bruno turned into a mouse he tries to tell his grandmother, but is apprehended and turned into a mouse himself.

Now if it were me, I wouldn't be that upset. Think about it, you still have your human brain, you're just a mouse. You don't have to worry about money or bills or any of that stuff. On top of that it's the animal kingdom, if there is some fine mouse pussy that you want, you just mount up and go to town. No dating, no consequences, you're a mouse. Anyhow he gets his granny's help they defeat the witches, save his friend and go to America.

It is a kick ass flick.

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