To Sir, with Love (1967)

Christian Roberts: Denham

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Quotes 

• [Mr. Thackeray, retaining his calm manner after excoriating the female students for their disgusting and sluttish behavior, returns to his classroom with the windows open after the females got ridden of a "sanitary pad" they brought inside] 

  Mark Thackeray : [grabs the books from his desk and drops them into the wastebasket]  Those are out. They are useless to you. I suddenly realized that you are not children, that you'll be adults in a few weeks with all the responsibilities that implies. So from now on, you will be treated as such by me and by each other. As adults, responsible adults. Next, we are going to be reasonable with each other. We are just going to talk, you and I. You are going to listen without interruption, and when I am finished, one of you may have your say without interruptions. Next, as...

  [Pamela rudely storms into the classroom, interrupting Thackeray new adult approach method] 

  Pamela Dare : Oh, blimey, what a morning I've had. Everything's gone wrong. First of all, the bleeding alarm didn't go off. Then I had to wait hours for a bus. Do you know, I think I must have stood there for about three bleeding hours waiting for a bus...

  Mark Thackeray : For example, there are two ways to enter a room. One is like an adult, a lady with dignity. The other is like a brat. Miss Dare has just shown us the second way. Perhaps she would care to demonstrate the first.

  [Pamela gets up and walks out of the classroom, then two seconds later walks back in politely] 

  Pamela Dare : [to the class, quietly]  I'm sorry I'm late.

  [Pamela takes her seat at her desk] 

  Mark Thackeray : [continues]  Next, we are all going to observe certain courtesies in this classroom. You will call me "sir" or "Mr. Thackeray". The young ladies will be addressed as "Miss", the boys by their surnames.

  Potter : [protests]  Yeah, why should we call 'em "Miss"? We know 'em.

  Mark Thackeray : I beg your pardon?

  Potter : I said, why should we call 'em "Miss", sir? We know 'em.

  Mark Thackeray : Is there any one of these young ladies you feel does not deserved to be addressed as "Miss"?.

  Potter : [Potter waits for five seconds, then responds]  No, sir.

  Mark Thackeray : Good. Next, general deportment. First, the young ladies. They must prove that they are worthy and appreciative of the courtesies we are going to show them. Soon, boyfriends and marriage will concern you. No man likes a slut for long. Only the worst type will marry one. And the competition for men on the outside is rough. Next, men, I've garbage collectors who are cleaner. Toughness is a quality of the mind, like bravery, honesty, and ambition. If you want to wear your hair long, clean it, or else you will soon get lice and smell. Soon your principal interest will be girls. You will be much more attracted to them with clean clothes, clean shoes, hands, face, teeth, et cetera. Now, any... any questions?

  [Babs raises her hand] 

  Mark Thackeray : Miss Pegg.

  Barbara Pegg : What about Mr. Weston, sir? He's never tidy and his are never brushed. And his hair's a mess, ain't it?

  [the students all agreeing] 

  Mark Thackeray : Mr. Weston is not your teacher. We won't discuss him. I'm the one to criticize if I fail to maintain the standards I ask of you.

  Denham : [protests]  That's not fair.

  Mark Thackeray : [walks to Denham; corrects him]  "Sir", or "Mr. Thackeray". Didn't you understand?

  Denham : That's not fair... sir.

  Mark Thackeray : I agree, but that's just an example of the many things you'll have to put up with when you're an adult. You'll just have to take it.

• Denham : [to Pamela Dare]  I know what's bothering you! You fancy him!