ffolkes (1980) Poster


Roger Moore: Ffolkes



  • Admiral Brindsen : I suppose you're one of those fellows who does the Times crossword puzzle in ten minutes.

    ffolkes : I have *never* taken ten minutes.

  • ffolkes : [to one of his frogmen]  Do that again, Harris, and I'll have your balls for breakfast!

  • ffolkes : I didn't know they had women on these things.

    Sarah : Yes, things are getting better in that way.

    ffolkes : A gigantic step backwards!

  • ffolkes : I like cats, and I don't like people who don't.

  • Lou Kramer : I don't like you, Flag,

    ffolkes : How fortunate.

    Lou Kramer : My instinct tells me you're bad news. Did you search him, Webb?

    Art Webb : I could tell you the size of his underwear.

  • Lord Privy Seal Dennis Tipping : You really don't like women much, do you?

    ffolkes : I do not. You see, I, together with my five elder sisters, was raised by a maiden aunt. Both my parents died tragically in childbirth. Until the age of ten, I was forced to wear my sister's hand-me-downs. Then when I married, I discovered to my horror that my wife also had five sisters, all unmarried, and all expecting my support. I find cats a far superior breed. Just on the off chance, I have made a will. I've left everything to my cats. I want it testified that I am sound of body and mind. Well go on!

  • ffolkes : A wet suit in vermilion. Just what one needs at night.

  • ffolkes : Jennifer? ffolkes here. You can tell the Lord Privy Seal the operation had been completed. As planned, naturally.

  • ffolkes : There are over 600 people relying on us to save their lives...

    [Turns and berates one of his men] 

    ffolkes : And you sir, you whacked that ladder as though it's a dinner gong! Do it again and I'll have your balls for breakfast!

  • ffolkes : Timing underwater. Speed Underwater. That is what half our assignments are about. Harris! Are you listening to me?

    Harris : Yes sir.

    ffolkes : Then bloody well well look at me! Yesterday, ONE man completed the exercise precisely on time. ME!

    [Produces a hand grenade from his bag] 

    ffolkes : Today, you will ALL complete the exercise precisely on time...

  • Fletcher : Work out what can be done if one of them is hijacked.

    ffolkes : Don't the armed forces have some ideas in that department?

    Fletcher : Undoubtedly. But an oil production platform isn't a building or an aeroplane. It's miles out to sea and you can't approach it without being seen or heard unless you come from below.

    ffolkes : Only a man of superior intellect is likely to think of a satisfactory way of hijacking a platform or a rig.

    Fletcher : Exactly.

    ffolkes : Therefore, I must put myself in his position and devide a means of doing so. And having done that, I simply work out how to overpower myself!

  • Captain Phillips : I was telling the Admiral your men are so well drilled they'll be able to find their way around Esther with their eyes shut.

    ffolkes : If any one of my men moves round anything with his eyes shut I shall personally gouge them out! It's time for a drink.

    Admiral Brindsen : Bit early isn't it?

    ffolkes : It's four hours since breakfast. That's late!

  • ffolkes : We drink Scotch here the way it should be drunk - neat!

  • [Sanna just knocked out a bad guy who was going to shoot ffolkes] 

    ffolkes : Thanks, boy.

    Sanna : Girl.

    ffolkes : You look like a boy. You act like a boy.

    Sanna : Okay! I'm a boy.

  • ffolkes : [ffolkes only has a ten pound to note to pay his cab fare]  I'll toss you for it.

    [Tosses coin] 

    ffolkes : Heads or tails?

    Cab Driver : [Wearily, expecting to be conned]  Heads.

    ffolkes : Heads it is. Must be your lucky day.

    [Hands ten pounds to driver] 

  • ffolkes : Where's Harris?

    Team Member : Someone threw him over the side!

  • Harris : How are we doing, sir?

    ffolkes : Like plowmen at a bloody knitting convention.

    Harris : We're improving, then.

  • ffolkes : This is a copy of my Will, I need your signature to prove I'm of sound mind, I'm leaving everything to my cats. Well go on, sign it, man!

  • ffolkes : You're not dressed like a ticket inspector...

  • ffolkes : [drinking Scotch on the train] 

  • ffolkes : This is a non-smoker!

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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