Trail of the Pink Panther (1982)

Peter Sellers: Chief Insp. Jacques Clouseau

Photos 

Quotes 

• Hotel Clerk : [Clouseau rings the bell for service]  Yes?

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : Do you have for me the 'massage'?

  Hotel Clerk : Oh. You want a massage, ey?

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : If you have one for me, yes.

  Hotel Clerk : Here. Why don't you try Tokyo Lil at the end of the block. Ask for Passionflower Shirley, the Yokohama Butterfly.

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : And why should I do that?

  Hotel Clerk : Well, you want a massage, don't you?

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : Yes, but I want it from you.

  Hotel Clerk : Sir, I don't give massages.

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : But you gave me one early this morning.

  Hotel Clerk : Sir, you're mistaken.

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : Look! Don't you try the tricks anglais with me, Monsieur. I receieved a 'massage' this morning from Inspector Quinlan of the Yard of Scotland.

  Hotel Clerk : The massage!

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : And it was you that gave it to me.

  Hotel Clerk : Message.

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : What?

  Hotel Clerk : You mean message.

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : Look, I know what I mean, you lunatic. Now do you, or do you not have for me, the 'massage'?

  Hotel Clerk : No, Sir. For you, there is no massage.

• Deputy Comissioner Lasorde : Read this most carefully and give me your opinion.

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : I will read my opinion and give you yours most carefully.

• Deputy Comissioner Lasorde : Do you have a light?

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : Yes, in the top left hand drawer.

  [the drawer is on fire] 

• Insp. Jacques Clouseau : [holding the letter he received from Dreyfus, then walks over to a taxi driver to convey himself to the airport]  To the airport my good man, and drive like the wind.

  Taxi Driver : Right sir.

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau , Taxi Driver : [Clouseau runs to the opposite taxi; the taxi driver gets in his taxi and drives off. Clouseau is shown sitting in the opposite taxi] 

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : I knew that, I knew that.

• [to Dreyfus who comes in after Clouseau sets his office on fire] 

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : Ah, hello! Nice weather we are having...

• [In disguise] 

  Insp. Jacques Clouseau : I am André Botot, mustard salesman from Dijon.

• Insp. Jacques Clouseau : [singing]  I'm dancing in the rice, just dancing in the rice, what a wonderful feeling. I'm... I'm happy in the rice, Always happy... oh, allow me.

  [his pants get stuck in the door and tear] 

• Insp. Jacques Clouseau : Now then, what was that you're saying?

• Insp. Jacques Clouseau : Swine seagull.