A Christmas Story (1983)
Ian Petrella: Randy Parker
Photos
Quotes
-
Randy : Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double-beatloaf. I hate meatloaf.
The Old Man : All right, I'll get that kid to eat. Where's my screwdriver and my plumber's helper? I'll open up his mouth and I'll shove it in.
-
Mother : [She enters the kitchen, as she finishes dinner and hears crying] Randy? Hi What's the matter? What you crying for?
Randy : [Crying] Daddy's gonna kill Ralphie!
Mother : [Assuring him] No, he's not...
Randy : [Still upset] Yes, he is too!
Mother : [Assuring him] No, he's not! I promise you, Daddy is not going to kill Ralphie!
Mother : Why don't you come out of there?
[Randy shakes his head no]
Mother : No?
Mother : Would you like some milk?
[Randy nods yes]
Mother : You would?
[She pours a glass of milk and hands it to Randy]
Mother : here you go, all right see you later? Okay, bye.
[She closes the door as Randy cries]
-
Schwartz : Hey, smart ass. I asked my old man about sticking your tongue to a flagpole in the winter, and he says that it'll freeze right to the pole, just like I told ya.
Flick : Ah, baloney. What would your old man know about anything?
Schwartz : He knows, because he once saw a guy stick his tongue to a railroad track on a bet, and the fire department had to come get the guy's tongue off the track, because he couldn't get it off.
Randy : [is trying to catch up] C'mon, guys! Wait up! C'mon, guys! Wait up!
-
Ralphie as an Adult : [Ralphie lays in bed with tears stained on his cheeks as he sobs silently and thinks] Three blocks away, Schwartz was getting his. There has never been a kid, who believed, vaguely but insistently, that he would be stricken blind before he reached 21 and then they'd be sorry.
[as they dream begins, Ralphie's bottom lip goes out]
Mother : [Ralphie begins to walk with his cane and knocks on the door] Why it's Ralph!
The Old Man : [Happy] Why come on in Ralph, where have you been?
Mother : [Getting surprised] Why he's carrying a cane!
The Old Man : [Also surprised] What is it Ralph? What happened?
Mother : [Surprised] Why he's blind!
The Old Man , Randy : [Also shocked] Blind? Oh my god!
[Randy runs down]
The Old Man , Randy : Ralphie!
Mother : Ralph is it something we did?
The Old Man : What brought you to this lowly state?
Mother : Oh please Ralph, no matter how much it hurt, what did we DO?
Ralphie : Oh, please, I can't.
Mother : Oh please Ralph, I must know what we did, what brought you to this?
The Old Man : Please.
Mother : Please?
Ralphie : It it was...
Mother : Yes, yes?
Ralphie : Soap poisoning!
[They both break down and sob]
The Old Man : How could we do this?
Ralphie : Well, I'll manage to get along, somehow.
Mother : I'll never forgive myself!
Ralphie : Thanks mom!
[She nods]
The Old Man : I told you not to use the life buoy!
The Old Man : I feel awful!
[Continues to sob. And Ralphie smiles. And back in reality he does the same]