The Muppets Take Manhattan (1984)

Dave Goelz: Gonzo, Chester the Rat, Bill the Frog, Zoot, Beauregard, Jim the Dog, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, Baby Gonzo Honeydew, Penguin

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Pete : Is no good. Rats want job. Frog want job. What next, penguins?

  [a group of penguins peek through the door] 

  Penguin : Do you have any jobs available?

  Pete , Kermit the Frog , Rizzo the Rat , Tatooey the Rat , Masterson Rat , Chester the Rat , Yolanda - Rat : No!

  Penguin : Well, excuse us for living!

• Gonzo : Maybe we should add more special effects like exploding socks.

• Bill the Frog : I'll pick up the bill today, Gil.

  Gil the Frog : Oh, good. Something from the grill, Jill?

  Jill the Frog : No, meat makes me ill, Gil.

• [Gonzo uses mouth-to-mouth resuicitation on his chicken] 

  Miss Piggy : Gonzo, is Camilla all right?

  Gonzo : Yeah, but I think we're engaged!

• Gonzo : Mr. Mayor! Mr. Mayor! Emergency! I'm looking for a frog who can sing and dance!

  The Honorable Edward I. Koch : If he can also balance the budget, I'll hire him!

• Baby Kermit : [Muppet Babies, singing]  She's gonna be a movie star. And she's gonna learn to drive a car; she's gonna be a vet'rinarian, too.

  [to Kermit] 

  Miss Piggy : And I'm gonna always love you-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh!

  Fozzie Bear : Well, she's gonna be a singer, whoa-whoa-whoa!

  Scooter : And she's gonna learn to fly a plane!

  Rowlf : She'll be a doctor of diseases and help you with your sneezes...

  Gonzo : ...and practice neurosurgery on your brain!

• Jim the Dog : Snookie-wookums want his little boney-woney?

• Bill the Frog : Well, how about: Ocean Breeze Soap - It's just like taking an ocean cruise, only there's no boat and you don't actually go anywhere.

  Kermit the Frog : Seems a bit long...

• Kermit the Frog : Have you tried something simple like: Ocean Breeze Soap will get you clean.

  Bill the Frog : Wait a minute! What just a second! You mean just say what the product does? Why, no one's ever tried that!

  Gil the Frog : Oh, well, it's - it's crazy.

  Jill the Frog : Why, it's nuts!

  Bill the Frog , Gil the Frog , Jill the Frog : We love it!

• Kermit the Frog : What's going on here?

  Scooter : Well... uh... we just got job offers. Uh... right guys?

  [everyone lies with ad libs, "yeah", "sure", "job offers"] 

  Kermit the Frog : That's great. But why do you all look so sad?

  Scooter : Well, it's just... they're kind of... out of town job offers. Right guys?

  [more ad libs with "yes", "out of town", etc] 

  Gonzo : What job did I get?

  Scooter : Gonzo! Shut up!

• Kermit the Frog : [after being taken hostage]  Gonzo, are you alright?

  Gonzo : I just saw my life flash before my nose!

• Gonzo : Maybe we could sell the show if you wrote in more special effects like exploding socks.

  Janice : Oh, Gonzo, like that's a really lame idea.

  Gonzo : Oh, yeah?

  Floyd : Hey man, stop yelling at her.

  Fozzie : He wasn't yelling.

  Gonzo : Yes, I was.

  Scooter : Oh, Gonzo, don't make trouble.

• Martin Price : Give me the general idea.

  Kermit the Frog : It's all about life in the big city.

  Martin Price : In the big city, huh? With cops, shootings, car chases, that kind of thing?

  Kermit the Frog : Well, no. No shooting stuff. It's more like songs and dances.

  Martin Price : Songs *and* dances?

  Kermit the Frog , Gonzo : Mmm-hmm!

  Martin Price : That might be interesting. Nobody cares about shootings anyway.

• Bill the Frog : Philip Phil? Catchy name. Phil, I'm Bill and this is Gil.

  Gil the Frog : Phil, I'm Gil and this is Jill.

  Jill the Frog : Phil, I'm Jill. You know Gil and Bill.

• Kermit the Frog : That's it. That's what's missing from the show. That's what we need. More frogs and dogs and bears and chickens and whatever. You're not gonna watch the show, you'll be in the show. Come on, everybody.

  Kermit the Frog , Miss Piggy , Fozzie Bear , Gonzo , Camilla , Scooter , Rowlf : [singing]  Look at us, Here we are, Right where we belong, The curtain's up, And the lights are bright, And they're playing our old song

  Kermit the Frog : What better place, Could anyone be?

• Baby Fozzie : [singing]  Mama, dada, poop poop, chihuahua!

  Baby Fozzie , Baby Gonzo Honeydew : Mama, dada, poop poop, chihuahua!

  Baby Fozzie , Baby Gonzo Honeydew , Baby Scooter : Mama, dada, poop poop, chihuahuahua! Hua hau hau hau!

• Bill the Frog : We've been working on a new slogan. Tell us if you like it.

  Gil the Frog : "Ocean Breeze Soap. For people who don't want to stink. "

  Bill the Frog : What do you think?

  Jill the Frog : Be frank, Phil.

  Kermit the Frog : [suffering from amnesia]  I don't like it.

  Gil the Frog : You don't?