Happy Gilmore (1996)

Verne Lundquist: Announcer

Quotes 

• Happy Gilmore : [Having a bad day of golfing due to a member of the crowd]  That guy's driving me *crazy*!

  Bob Barker : You know what's driving *me* crazy? You, not getting the ball in the hole.

  Happy Gilmore : Don't push me, Bob! Now's not the time.

  [Happy hits the ball, which hits a man standing on a boat, who then falls into the water] 

  Bob Barker : This guy sucks!

  Announcer : We haven't seen Happy Gilmore play *this* badly since his first day on tour. He and Bob Barker are now dead-last.

  Bob Barker : I can't *believe* you're a professional golfer! I think you should be working at the snack bar.

  Happy Gilmore : [Angrily, with teeth clenched]  You better relax, Bob.

  Bob Barker : There is *no* way that you could have been as bad at hockey as you are at golf!

  Happy Gilmore : Alright, let's go!

  [Happy throws down his club and punches Bob in the face, who falls to the ground] 

  Happy Gilmore : You like that, old man? You want a piece of me?

  Bob Barker : [Shaking his head as he gets up]  I don't want a *piece* of you, I want the *whole thing*!

  [Punches Happy in the gut, then proceeds to punch him in the face ten times, sending Happy falling into a pond] 

  Happy Gilmore : [Happy gets out]  Now you're gonna get it, Bobby!

  [Happy grabs his club and swings at Bob, who blocks, punches Happy in the face, then throws him to the ground. Happy tackles Bob, resulting in both of them rolling down a hill. At the bottom, Happy headbutts Bob] 

  Happy Gilmore : The price is *wrong*, bitch!

  Bob Barker : [Bob grabs Happy's throat, opens his eyes with a menacing look, stands up, punches Happy in the gut twice, and once in the face before Happy falls down again]  I think you've had enough.

  [Starts to walk away, but notices Happy start to stand up again] 

  Bob Barker : No?

  [Kicks Happy in the face] 

  Bob Barker : [while walking away]  *Now* you've had enough... bitch.

• Announcer : What a shot by Happy Gilmore!

  [turns to his partner] 

  Announcer : Who the hell is Happy Gilmore?

• Announcer : Quite a large and economically diverse crowd here at the Michelob Invitational. I guess it's the new tour sensation Happy Gilmore who's attracting all sorts of people to this beautiful course.

• Announcer : Happy Gilmore is in big trouble, Jack. He's lost the power to hit the long ball.