How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days (2003)

Matthew McConaughey: Ben

Photos 

Quotes 

• Andie : Our love fern! You let it die!

  Ben : No, honey, it's just sleeping.

• Andie : Unattached?

  Ben : Currently.

  Andie : Likewise.

  Ben : Surprising.

  Andie : Psycho?

  Ben : Rarely. Interested?

  Andie : Perhaps.

  Ben : Hungry?

  Andie : Starving.

  Ben : Leaving?

  Andie : Now?

• Ben : [to himself, on his balcony, waving goodbye to Andy before she gets in her cab]  You're already falling in love with me.

  Andie : I'm gonna make you wish you were dead.

  [blows away a kiss to Ben up on his balcony] 

  Andie : Poor guy.

• Andie : True or False: All's fair in love and war.

  Ben : True.

  Andie : Great answer.

  Ben : Good question!

• Ben : So that's what I was, huh? I was a guinea pig. Somebody you can test your theories on?

  Andie : Yeah, and I was just a girl somebody picked out in a bar.

  Ben : Yeah, you know what? Big deal. Hell, now you can even use it as a little twist in your story.

  Andie : That's a good idea. Maybe we should bet on it.

  Ben : You know what, you did your job now, Andie.

  Andie : Yes, I did.

  Ben : You wanted to lose a guy in ten days, congratulations, you did it. You just lost him.

  [walks away] 

  Andie : No I didn't Ben, 'cause you can't lose something you never had!

• Andie : [thrusts herself onto Ben]  Does Princess Sophia want to come out and play?

  Ben : Who's Princess Sophia?

  [Andie points at his crotch] 

  Ben : Nah-nah-nah, nah! Whoa, whoa, you're kidding me, right? Princess Sophia?

  Andie : Little, big, little, big? I don't know. We will find out!

  Ben : Alright listen, you can't name my... my member Princess Sophia.

  Andie : Yes, I can!

  Ben : Listen, if you are gonna name m... my member, alright, you gotta name it something hyper masculine, okay? Something like a Spike, a Butch, a Krull the Warrior King!

• Thayer : Is she on something?

  Ben : God I hope so.

  [Moves his finger in circles next to his head, to indicate that he thinks Andie is crazy] 

  Andie : Are you saying I'm some kind of mental person?

  [Andie is holding a platter of veggies and flings them at the guys and the middle of the poker table, then tosses the platter onto the table] 

• Ben : Excuse me, ma'am.

  Jeannie Ashcroft : Holy crap!

  Ben : Where's Andie Anderson?

  Jeannie Ashcroft : Uh, she's not here.

  Ben : Where is she?

  Michelle Rubin : She quit.

  Jeannie Ashcroft : She's got an interview in Washington.

  Ben : When is she leaving?

  Jeannie Ashcroft : Today.

  Ben : When?

  Jeannie Ashcroft : Well, like, now.

  Ben : You're not a therapist, are you?

  Michelle Rubin : Oh, haha... no.

  Ben : Good job, though. You owe me three hundred bucks.

• Michelle Rubin : So, tell me, how long have you guys been seeing each other?

  Andie : Seven days.

  Michelle Rubin : Seven days. Interesting.

  Ben : Is that too soon to be seeing a therapist?

  Andie : Well, Ben, seven days isn't like a lifetime, or anything...

  Ben : It's like a week.

• [last lines] 

  Ben : Look who made the trip with me.

  Andie : It's our love fern! Oh, Bennie-boo-boo, boo-boo.

• Ben : Let's take a break because the woman is driving me crazy.

  Tony : Which woman? Andie or Princess Sophia?

• Thayer : That it?

  Tony : That's it?

  Ben : [points to purse on desk]  That's it.

  Tony : Have you looked inside?

  Ben : No.

  Thayer : Do you have an ethical problem with rifling through a woman's purse?

  Ben : Uhh, yeah, I guess I do.

  Tony : Well, it's hardly a purse, dude, it's more like a... clutch or something.

  Ben : Guys, a woman's purse, alright, it's her secret source of power. Alright? There are many dark and dangerous things in there, that we, the male species, should know nothing about.

• Andie : I want you to respect me.

  Ben : I do. And, I want your respect.

  Andie : I respect you for respecting me.

  Ben : I respect that.

• Ben : That's what I'm talking about. Where's the sexy, cool, fun, smart, beautiful Andie that I knew? The one that wanted to be a serious journalist? You're up, you're down, you're here, you're there, you're like a frickin' one woman circus.

• Ben : Look, look, look, wait a minute. The one night we even thought about having sex, all right, she up and decides she's going to nickname my...

  Michelle Rubin : Penis?

  Ben : Yeah. "Princess Sophia." You want to talk about shooting a man's horse? Whop! Come on!

• Andie : Hey, listen, Sparky. I have a masters in journalism from Columbia, my boss loves me, and if I do it her way for a while, I can write about whatever I want.

  Ben : Like, shoes?

• Andie : [crying at restaurant after waitress asks if everything is okay]  My boyfriend thinks I'm fat!

  [flicks food at Ben] 

  Andie : And I can't eat in front of him! I can't eat in front of you! I have to go to the bathroom.

  Ben : [receives dirty looks from other customers]  Honey, I don't think you're fat! I don't think she's fat!

• [Andie starts crying when Ben places food in front of her] 

  Ben : Hey, what's wrong?

  Andie : Nothing. It's beautiful.

  Ben : Thank you.

  Andie : You're beautiful. The game, the whole thing. It's just... I wish I ate meat. Mary had a little lamb, little lamb... You have to take it away before I gag.

  [Andie dry heaves] 

• Ben : You see, the key to this game is being able to read people.

• Andie : Does Krull the Warrior King want to come out and play?

  Ben : No.

  Andie : Krull...

  Ben : You know what, due to intense humiliation, the king has momentarily abdicated his throne, okay?

  Andie : Oh. Uh-oh!

  Ben : Yeah.

  Andie : Well, in that case, I better get going. Take care of our love fern, honey.

• Ben : [introducing Andie to his family]  And this is Joey Jr.

  Glenda : [to Jack, playing BS]  Bullshit!

  Ben : Now the whole family suffers from tourette's, I hope that's not a problem.

• Ben : Hanging with her for 10 days is gonna be no problem.

  Tony : Right. That's only nine days longer than you've ever spent with any other chick, huh?

• Thayer : We, you know, we got a whole bunch of work we have to do, but we're still on for poker at your house this weekend?

  Ben : Oh, you count on it.

  Andie : Whoo! Boys' night.

  Tony : Whoo!

• [Ben is trying to find words to be used as metaphors for diamonds] 

  Ben : How about 'Glitter'?

  Tony : Thayer's favorite movie.

  Thayer : It was underrated!

• Ben : Jesus! Five seconds ago I'm gay. Now I'm a pathological flirt.

  Andie : I sweat when I get nervous.

  Ben : Which one is it, Andie?

  Ben : Besides, why would I need to hit on another woman?

  Ben : You've got more than enough personalities to keep me completely occupied.

  Andie : That was hurtful.