- Earl Cooper: I'm gonna miss this place.
- Batman: Only 'til you see the new one I'm setting up for you. But this time, I had my... backers set up dummy corporations to order the parts through, so no one can ever trace you again.
- Earl Cooper: Yeah? Wait 'til you see the new Batmobile. It's gonna have tritium thrusters, dual accelerators, fuel-injected turbo-boosters...
- Earl Cooper: [sees the damaged Batmobile] You been letting the kid drive again?
- Robin: Ha ha. Actually we were playing chicken with a penguin.
- Batman: Or three of his men.
- Robin: Looks great, Earl.
- Batman: Big job, wasn't it? You look tired.
- Earl Cooper: Yeah. Well, it took longer than I figured. See? Uh, haven't even had time to clean up yet.
- Robin: Where's Marva?
- Earl Cooper: Oh, down in the basement. Got some cleaning to do down there...
- [stressing the words]
- Earl Cooper: ...in the basement. By the way, I even fixed the air conditioning switch.
- Batman: Uh... right.
- The Penguin: I wanted the rare ones. The reverse audobon! These aren't even worth enough to pay for the repairs to the limousine. Give me one good reason why I shouldn't have Percival here peck out your eyes.
- Rundle: This is an order my company received yesterday.
- The Penguin: [taking it] "Titanium-steel wheel wells, 12-gauge piston pins..."
- Rundle: Very few vehicles use such unusual materials as those.
- The Penguin: And the point of this is what?
- Rundle: I think these parts were ordered for the Batmobile.
- The Penguin: Hmm?
- Sheldrake: Tell him why, Arnie.
- Rundle: Well, right after I got that order, Falcone told me about what happened to the Batmobile while it was chasing your limo the other day. From the description, I'd say the kind of damage the Batmobile would have sustained might require the kind of replacement parts in that order.
- The Penguin: Yes. Yes, I understand.
- Rundle: You do?
- The Penguin: Why, yes. And it's absolutely brilliant. A first-rate piece of detective work. You are to be rewarded, sir.
- Rundle: Reward?
- The Penguin: Would $300,000 be enough?
- Rundle: 300,000?
- The Penguin: Oh, all right, 400,000, but that's my final offer.
- The Penguin: Now what?
- Sheldrake: Ah, the flipping thing darn near electrocuted me. It's some kind of security device to keep it from being tampered with.
- The Penguin: Then disconnect it.
- Sheldrake: I-I wouldn't even know where to look for it.
- The Penguin: Well, I know who does. And he's going to help us. Aren't you, Earl?
- Earl Cooper: In your dreams, Pinocchio.
- The Penguin: And how, pray tell, did that costumed clown give you such a bad case of loyalty?
- Earl Cooper: None of your business.
- The Penguin: I'm making it my business. Perhaps you've heard of my umbrella weapons. Would you like to see what one can do to your daughter?
- Earl Cooper: Yes, Batman. It's ready anytime you want to pick it up.
- [hanging up]
- Earl Cooper: He's on his way.
- The Penguin: And we will be ready for him. Won't we, Earl? All right, gentlemen, battle stations! The Bat is about to bite... the dust, that is.
- Robin: [trapped in the sabotaged Batmobile] I've got a feeling we're about to take the hard way down.
- Batman: Down? The basement!
- Robin: Huh?
- Batman: Earl. He kept saying "basement." It's a racing term. When drivers crash, they say they've gone down in the basement. He was trying to warn us! The air conditioning switch. He said he fixed it.
- [pressing the button, he and Robin are safely ejected]
- The Penguin: [destroying the Batmobile and presumably killing Batman and Robin] Pity. It was a magnificent vehicle.
- [last lines]
- The Penguin: [exclaims upon seeing a license plate] 1BAT4U?
- [breaks it in half, growling angrily]