- Dr. Mark Greene: How many people know about me and Chuny Marquez?
- Dr. Doug Ross: Including the cleaning crew?
- Dr. David Morgenstern: Carter, what's the difference between a prostate and a garden hose?
- Dr. John Carter: I have no idea.
- Dr. David Morgenstern: I'll tell you: There's a vas deferens.
- Dr. Kerry Weaver: The heart of any emergency room is the admit desk. Information is the blood that courses through it, and the desk clerk is like the tricuspid valve, if you will.
- Dr. Kerry Weaver: Most interns send their urine samples to the lab without knowing what happens once they're there. Let's pretend that we're urine samples, and find out.
- Dr. Mark Greene: Sasha, what a pleasant surprise. Sasha's one of our five-star chefs in the cafeteria. So what's today's special?
- Sasha: Bratwurst. Idiot busboy carries out bin of hot water. Shoom! Right down my boot.
- Dr. Mark Greene: Pretty nasty. Normally, I'd amputate, but I'm afraid you'd put it on the menu.
- Nurse Haleh Adams: We got a situation here.
- Nurse Carol Hathaway: Well, I spoke to Mary Cain and she says she doesn't know who leaked it.
- Nurse Haleh Adams: And you believed her?
- Nurse Carol Hathaway: Yeah, I did.
- Nurse Haleh Adams: We had an agreement on the table to protect current staffing levels and management just pulled it. They're gonna use this to renege on the whole contract.
- Nurse Carol Hathaway: I'm sorry to hear that.
- Nurse Haleh Adams: You had no idea they were gonna use this incident against us?
- Nurse Carol Hathaway: No, I didn't. What? You think I'm lying to you?
- Nurse Haleh Adams: I don't know anymore, Carol.
- Nurse Carol Hathaway: You and management can fight and scream and tear each other's hair out for all I care. I've got a patient.