User Reviews

I wasn't really expecting much out of this film. And I thought that it coming out the same weekend as Toy Story 3 was pretty laughable. But it seemed like fun, so I thought I'd give it a try. Sadly, it turned out pretty much how I expected, and it's no wonder there was such little advertisement paid to this film.

Jonah Hex is pretty straightforward in it's story. Jonah Hex witnessed his family die at the hands of John Turnbull. Unfortunately, for Hex, Turnbull died mysteriously in a hotel fire...or did he. Turns out Tunrbull is still alive and a danger to the US. Now, Jonah must get his revenge and save the US.

A lot of people have compared this film to The Wild Wild West. Thankfully, this is not that film. Granted, it's not all that grounded in reality (actually, it's not grounded in reality much at all), but there's no giant walking spiders or head slicing, flying discs. The action here is pretty ridiculous and outrageous, but at the same is fun. It helps that Josh Brolin, as the titular Jonah Hex, is pretty damn cool. He plays off Dirty Harry pretty well, with only a few one liners and a pretty well drawn out character. In fact, I would say that if they ever do a remake of Dirty Harry, I would vote for Brolin to take up the reins. Unfortunately, most of the rest of the cast is not as good. John Malkovich plays Turnbull lazily. Sure, he's not as hammy as he could have been, which I am grateful for, but I can't help but feel that he isn't the least bit interested in what he is doing. And with the kind of character he's supposed to be, there should be more passion, but it's sadly missing. As for the third big name, Megan Fox does what she does best and looks hot in some slutty western dresses. For a film like this, I guess you can't ask much more from her.

The action is obviously where this film is at, and it mostly delivers. It's far from the biggest action film this summer, but there are some pretty outrageous and entertaining pieces, like the Gatling gun-mounted horse and the dynamite gun scenes known from the trailer. And when there isn't action going on, Brolin saves the film. Besides the action, he is the best thing here. I would also even argue that the film does a good job translating the comic book style. While it could have been much better, it could also have been a lot worse. I guess I can at least be thankful for that.

Suffice to say, I pretty much got what I thought I would get out of the film: a cool Josh Brolin, a hot Megan Fox, a wooden John Malkovich, and a lot of crazy action. Was I satisfied? I suppose. It was a decent way to kill about an hour and a half. Would I run out to the theater for this? Nah. If you really care about the ticket price and your time, I would just wait to rent it on DVD.

The new DC Comics movie "Jonah Hex" qualifies as a saddle-sore supernatural horse opera. Imagine the classic Clint Eastwood western "The Outlaw Josey Wales" combined with the abominable Will Smith epic "Wild Wild West" and you'll have a rough idea about what to expect from this outlandish, often incoherent, half-baked travesty. Despite its PG-13 rating, "Jonah Hex" boasts some rather brutal violence, but the consequences of the violence are rarely depicted. Josh Brolin toplines a capable cast as a cursed Confederate officer who has endured a near-death experience and possesses some bizarre powers. Ostensibly, this Warner Brothers' release brings into the limelight a little known DC Comics' character that appeared initially in the 1970s. Unfortunately, "Gamer" scenarists Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor have changed several significant events and characters. First, we learn little about our anti-hero's origins. Second, Neveldine and Taylor neglect to delineate Jonah Hex's obvious supernatural capability. Mind you, Jonah Hex isn't immortal, but he can lay hands on dead men and temporarily resurrect them to satisfy his curiosity. Third, whatever charisma Neveldine and Taylor had going for them in their "Gamer" as well as their "Crank" movies never reaches the screen in "Jonah Hex." Reportedly, Neveldine and Taylor were supposed to helm "Jonah Hex," but they left the film after creative differences with the studio.

An American Civil War prologue depicts Jonah Hex as a valiant Confederate officer leading raids against Union troops. During his voice over narration, Jonah announces that war and he were made for each other. Things drastically change later when Hex refuses to obey an order to burn a civilian hospital with the patients trapped inside. The action is relayed in expository dialogue between our hero and a dead man. When Hex refused to carry out the order, he shoots his best friend, Jeb Turnball (Jeffrey Dean Morgan of "Watchmen"), and Jeb's father, General Quentin Turnbull (John Malkovich of "Shadow of a Vampire"), tracks Hex down after the war to exact vengeance. They tie Hex to an x-shaped cross and raze his house with his wife and young child trapped inside. Before Turnball leaves, the heartless villain wields smoldering branding iron with his initials and scorches the right side of Hex's face. Crow Indians find the tortured Hex later and perform various ritualistic ceremonies that endow our hero with supernatural powers. Hex appropriates a tomahawk, warms it until it glows, and burned off the initials. As a result, our vengeance-driven hero's face is twisted into a sneer on one side with a hole in his jaw near his teeth. Everybody that confronts Hex bothers him about what happened to his countenance. Usually, Hex kills them. Sadly, our protagonist learns to his chagrin that Turnball has died in a hotel fire. Anyhow, Hex turns to a life of bounty hunting after Turnball's demise. Hex establishes a relationship a frontier call girl, Lilah (Megan Fox of "Jennifer's Body"), who is crazy about him.

Hex gets into trouble when he arrives in a two-bit town to get his bounty money for killing four brothers. Initially, the lawmen are not prepared to pay him off. They see only three bodies. Hex has the three corpses tied behind his horse, and he has dragged them through the desert. He expects them to pay him the vast sum of $100 for the quartet. One of the lawmen observes that there was a fourth brother. Hex slings a bag with a head in it at the lawmen, and they decide not to honor their agreement with him. Instead, they aim to collect the $500 on Hex's head. A man with a rifle in the church bell tower blasts away at Hex, but he is a terrible marksman. The lawmen empty their holsters to fire, too. Unveiling two Gatling guns hanging on either side of his horse, Hex wipes out everybody. Never mind that no horse could tote around such heavy armament. Concessions have to be made in larger-than-life movies like "Jonah Hex," but Haywood doesn't make anything look cool. The Army arrives after as Hex is getting out of bed with Lilah. They conscript him into the military at gun point. They have news that Quentin Turnball is alive. President Grant (Aiden Quinn of "Practical Magic") thinks Hex is the ideal hombre to track down murderous Turnball.

Meantime, Turnball steals a massive, multi-barreled, revolving cannon devised by Eli Whitney, Sr., that will enable the user to flatten an entire town. The military has concealed the weapon. They feel that its power is too devastating. Predictably, Quentin Turnball thinks otherwise. He hijacks the train and uses dynamite to blow the Federal troops guarding the weapon sky high along with the civilian passengers. Women and children are among the soldiers. Hex exploits his power to make the dead loquacious and learns from Jeb that Quentin Turnbull is holed up at Fort Resurrection. At the fort, Hex boards the ironclad ship equipped with the weapon of vast destruction. Turnbull and his men are about to launch the ship when Hex shoots it out with the villains, but the wily villain escapes. Turnball plans to steam his warship within range of Washington, D.C., and then open fire on the centennial celebration.

Of course, Hex puts the hex on Turnbull. Basically, "Jonah Hex" suffers from an incoherent script. We are never told exactly why the villains must fire five cannonballs and then fire a gold cannon ball that detonates the other cannon balls. The best thing that "Horton Hears a Who!" director Jimmy Hayward does with this formulaic western is rein it in to a mere 80 minutes. Nothing about this oater is memorable. The dialogue is forgettable, and poor Josh Brolin looks like somebody glued a slice of pepperoni pizza to his face. Megan Fox is sexy, but she isn't around long enough to make much of an impression. A bearded, long-haired John Malkovich rounds out the cast as the homicidal terrorist.

Jonah Hex isn't one of the best movies I have seen. In fact, I can even guarantee you that it will not be in my top 10 at the end of the year. I can also guarantee that it will be nominated for a couple of Razzie awards, but who cares? I found it to actually be really entertaining. I have some problems still with the editing, particularly towards the end when he's dreaming of a fight with Turnbull and he's fighting him at the same time...This sequence got a little bit confusing. Another sequence that was confusing was when the Natives were treating his bullet wound...It was a bit weird to watch, kind of because of the editing. The film also disappointed me with it's length. My friend and I looked at each other when the credits rolled and we thought we had only spent half an hour inside the movie theatre. But if you continue reading you'll find out why I enjoyed so much.

One of the main reasons I liked it was because of the performances of the actors. Josh Brolin gives all he's got in an energetic performance as the title character, Jonah Hex. On the side notes, Megan Fox is also pretty good, and for once her acting is okay. Perhaps it's just a step higher in a career that will otherwise, like it or not, last a long time. John Malkovich is a talented actor, but we can all agree that his performance as Quentin Turnbull wasn't his best. But even the most talented movie makers and actors also go wrong once in a while, and while his performance wasn't that bad, it wasn't typical John Malkovich. Micheal Fassbender is probably the worst, and his acting was much better in last year's Inglourious Basterds. On another note, the early moments of the film shown in ''comic'' remind a lot of what Quentin Tarantino had done in Kill Bill, and were definitely a plus for me.

As for the script, people need to stop bashing it. It was written by Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor, the two guys behind Crank, Crank : High Voltage and Gamer. The people who have seen all three of the movies I mentioned above probably understand that these guys have their own style, and that their style is reflected everywhere in this movie. Of course perhaps the violence has been toned down for the PG-13 rating but the style is reflected, particularly in the way the dialogues are spoken and in the way the action is presented.

Story: Jonah Hex (Josh Brolin) is a disfigured man whose family was killed by Quentin Turnbull (John Malkovich. Hex tries his best to find Turnbull, who fakes his own death, but believing Turnbull is dead, he becomes a bounty hunter that is wanted dead or alive. His only relationship is with a prostitute named Lilah (Megan Fox). But once Turnbull comes back, Hex will stop at nothing to kill the man once for good. Personally, I enjoyed it, and although this film will not please to everyone, those who enjoyed Neveldine/Taylor's previous works will certainly enjoy this film. If you don't like their style, perhaps you should stay as far back as possible from this movie, because it is not a comic-book adaptation like any other. If you're sure you want to see it then I suggest you go now because at this time, the film is flopping, and to become a success, it needs money. If you're not sure, wait to rent the DVD or Blu-Ray and if you think it will suck, then do yourself a favour unlike many people did here on IMDb and just don't go watch it, because frankly, I believe some people knew they'd find it bad and just went to see it to be able to complain afterwards.

Having just seen Jonah Hex this weekend, I must say I can't understand how this movie has a 4.2 (as of July 26th, 2010). I just don't get it. I've read some of the comics, and yes, this movie doesn't have much to do with them - but welcome to comic book movie adaptations (when not directed by Zack Snyder).

I think a lot of people are still bitter over the extensive re-shoots and scene-cuts that were done, but in no way does the movie seem 'pieced together,' or anything like that. The pace is even appropriate. And for everyone who's saying things about Megan Fox's acting... have you seen any other Megan Fox movies? You can tell that the part was written specifically for her because she doesn't have very many lines and she shows a lot of skin - and that's why it works. As for Josh Brolin, he did a great job. Only guy that could've beaten him in this role would have been Eastwood in his prime. The supporting actors (John Malcovich, Jeffrey Dean-Morgan, Will Arnet) even did a great job. It even has a pretty cool hard rock/western score by Mastodon.

So, that being said, and the fact that this is a fairly straight-forward, yet entertaining, revenge tale, I'd give it a 7/10. I could see people who don't care about comics, or westerns, or revenge stories - I don't know why those people would go to see this movie, but I digress - giving it a 6/10... or even a 5/10... but 4.2? Seriously? Sherlock Holmes sucked and it has a 7.5. Gimme a break.

They were pretty smart with this movie, releasing it only a short time after red dead:Redemption every player of that game wanted to see this movie, in the same western setting. Honestly, i was one of them. After seeing the trailers i couldn't wait too see a bad ass cowboy with turrets on his horse and megan fox being the usually megan fox.

The beginning wasn't that bad, a decent introduction of the characters and how the main characters got his trademark face injury, im sorry to say it went downhill from there. The storyline was pretty much non existent, aside from the main character wanting revenge. The antagonist is barley introduced and the viewer has no idea why hes even considered bad until he happens upon a giant cannon ship with giant yellow balls that can destroy a damn continent, so dubbed "The Continent Destroyer" by me and my friends.

We generally use this term to describe any movie that "has little to no plot-line" or uses any instance of deus ex machina. Which is exactly what this movie did. Without any explanation on how the weapon came to be, why he found it, and what the hell those giant balls are, and hell..it doesn't even say WHY he wants to destroy the damn country, but he manages to get this super weapon to the sea and beings destroying Washington D.C one massive yellow ball at a time.

This movie could have been much better, and im sorry i wasted my money on it, but it gave me and my friends to laugh about, and a term that we use to this day.

Jonah Hex (2010)

** (out of 4)

After seeing his family murdered and himself brutally mutilated by Quentin Turnbull (John Malkovich), Jonah Hex (Josh Brolin) turns bounty hunter to capture any bad guy he can but soon the President asks Hex to track down and kill Turnbull who has stolen a massive weapon that could take out the country. Without the ending credits this thing clocks in at 73-minutes, which is rather amazing in today's world when it seems movies keep getting longer and longer. I don't mind the short running time as I feel it something we need more of but at the same time this film is a mess. For starters, while watching the thing it's clear this was meant to be longer and more violent. The film jumps around from one bit of the story to the next and it appears the short running time was done to build the "style" of storytelling. Well, it just doesn't work because you feel as if you're watching something that is missing footage. This continues with the violence because at times we're watching a rather dark and moody film but then we get quick edits when the violence happens so to my eyes it's rather obvious that they wanted to get this a PG-13 rating. Would the more graphic violence had helped? I'd say probably so because, again, it's obvious the film had it cut out. I put the majority of the blame on director Hayward and his style. The quick edits, fast zooms and the various other "cool" objects he throws at us is just distracting and in the end they become very boring. This isn't a complete bomb as we do get some nice stuff and that includes Hex's ability to talk with the dead by touching them and bringing them back to life. I found some of these special effects to be off but at the same time it gave the film a certain darkness that I enjoyed. The best moment in the film happens when Hex brings his dead friend back to life, a friend he just happened to kill. The film takes place just after the Civil War and I thought they got the look of the land pretty good and this here was another plus. What does keep the film moving better than it deserves was the performance by Brolin who managed to make the character his very own. I loved the laid back approach to the role and Brolin's dry sense of humor worked perfectly as we do get a few nice one-liners. Malkovich appears to be having fun but the film doesn't get to spend too much time with him. Megan Fox plays the prostitute who Hex cares for and delivers a rather blah performance. There's nothing bad with her but there's nothing good either. She's obviously just here for eye candy as she's constantly in skimpy clothes and it's never made clear why she's in love with a disfigured Hex. I normally don't go for a film like this but the subject matter, cast and trailer made it look interesting but sadly the end result is extremely mixed and all in all a major disappointment. This film should have been so much more but the poor direction and ugly style just kills it in the end.

Hands down worst movie ever made.... The acting looked like something out of a first grade play and the props appeared to be very cheap. Nothing was explained whatsoever by the childish dialogue and there seemed to be myriad holes in the superficial plot which failed to explain even the simplest questions that a viewer may have. Jonah's power was never explained nor were the roles of the Indians in the movie nor was the surface even scratched about how the weapon worked which just made the movie seem surreal and almost comical because things just seemed to happen without reason but just merely because it seemed convenient for the writers. If this movie was a comedy and Megan Fox talked less and got naked more perhaps it would deserve more than one star.

Don't know what everyone is complaining about. I rate this movie a respectable 6 out of 10. It's an action movie based on a relatively obscure comic.

It's got a hero who talks to the dead, evil Confederate General as a villain with a weapon of mass destruction. The villain's plan is plausible, and equally nefarious. The hero is equipped with two horse mounted Gatling Guns, and a pair of pistols fitted with mini-crossbows.

On top of that you got Megan Fox. I have no complaints about her acting here. On the same level as her Transformers performance. Heck she's no Meryl Streep, but nice eye candy.

Very watchable, in my opinion.

From what I know of in the comics Jonah Hex was a man who gruesomely kills his foes. It was a little disappointing not to see such scenes with make Jonah's character authentic. Megan Fox was for her part much like the character in the comic, lush, vibrant and able to kick butt. The film was a bit dark in some scenes, could have used better lighting. Still the impact of using a nation killing weapon was a good idea, albeit that most of the script was scrapped making this a very short film. That was also disappointing. But Josh Brolin did bring out the meanness of Jonah Hex to the screen, and to me that was a bonus. Seeing him wipe out the bad guys without so much as a second thought, using either a gun or knife was a pleasure to watch. Jonah Hex's life was in turmoil, to be a bounty hunter which can be revived using crowfoot medicinal remedies. I found this movie to be a good summer filler for the blockbusters coming soon. Until then, I think Jonah Hex could use a makeover for a next instalment. That I can wait for.

To repeat, the bad reviews of this movie made me so mad/are so appallingly misleading, I decided to register just to contradict them! Please ignore/don't pay attention to the bad reviews. This was a great movie with original CG effects/ideas. For instance, the scenes where Jonas Hex by mere touch can bring dead stiff, ashen corpses back to living color, talkative life so he can interrogate them. I am not a big fan of Megan Fox, but she was very believable, beautiful, graceful in this role...The fact John Malkovich was in this movie alone gives it credibility...There is an interesting story, good acting, great scenery, photography...plenty of suspense, action...etc etc, etc...Well worth the time watching..Hope there is a sequel! Won't miss it!