Two and a Half Men (2003–2015)
8.0/10
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Large Birds, Spiders and Mom 

Jake is ready to begin junior high school, until Alan scares him by telling him about all of the horrors that he experienced. Meanwhile, Charlie has a rash in a most inopportune area.

Director:

Ted Wass

Writers:

Chuck Lorre (created by), Lee Aronsohn (created by) | 4 more credits »
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Cast

Episode cast overview:
Charlie Sheen ... Charlie Harper
Jon Cryer ... Alan Harper
Angus T. Jones ... Jake Harper
Conchata Ferrell ... Berta
Kris Iyer Kris Iyer ... Dr. Prajneep
Brian Turk ... Mike
Monica Young ... Julie
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Storyline

Charlie is plagued by a terribly and 'intimate' itchy rash (privates is inappropriate for him, as Alan points out). Now Jake is finally allowed to junior high school, Alan 'prepares' him by making him a target of ridicule, not bullying. Alas Alan and Charlie pull out too many horror stories, so Jake finds his own safe 'solution'. Charlie mocks Alan's constant cowardliness, stirring him to a single, soon regretted act of ill-considered bravery. Written by KGF Vissers

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis

Genres:

Comedy | Romance

Certificate:

TV-14 | See all certifications »
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Did You Know?

Trivia

When Jake gets on the bus, the Bewitched house is across the street. See more »

Goofs

Chuck Lorre's "Vanity Cards" usually don't suffer fact-checking criticism, but #183, the one at the end of this episode is flawed. The brief scenario has a Sopranos-type character, Paulie Walnuts, trying to get rid of his "pesky cat". He whacks the cat, then "drives it to the East River for disposal." On arrival, he learns that the cat isn't quite dead, prompting the moral dilemma, "Should he spare the determined feline, or toss him into the polluted waters that separate two great states?" Unless Queens/Brooklyn are so different from Manhattan as to be considered two states (and the argument could possibly be made!), it is the *other* side of Manhattan, the Hudson River to the West, that separates New York and New Jersey, See more »

Quotes

Alan Harper: I've got you a little present. Your very own cell phone.
Jake Harper: Oh, cool!
Alan Harper: Now, the important thing to remember is that this is not a toy. It's to use in emergencies only.
Jake Harper: Emergencies? What emergencies?
Charlie Harper: [Pretending to use a cell phone] Dad, come get me! I'm stuffed in my locker and my underwear is wet!
Alan Harper: That only happened once.
Charlie Harper: If that drug-sniffing dog hadn't found you, you'd have missed Thanksgiving.
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Soundtracks

Two and a Half Men Theme
Written by Chuck Lorre
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Details

Country:

USA

Language:

English

Release Date:

24 September 2007 (USA) See more »

Company Credits

Show more on IMDbPro »

Technical Specs

Runtime:

Sound Mix:

Stereo

Color:

Color

Aspect Ratio:

1.78 : 1
See full technical specs »

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