3.6/10
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86 user 47 critic

Stan Helsing (2009)

Trailer
2:27 | Trailer
A spoof on many horror movie series. Ending his shift at the video rental, Stan's picked up by his BFF and 2 cute girls, all going to a Halloween party. Will they even get there?

Director:

Bo Zenga

Writer:

Bo Zenga
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Bottom Rated Movies #85 | 1 win. See more awards »

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
Steve Howey ... Stan Helsing
Diora Baird ... Nadine
Kenan Thompson ... Teddy
Desi Lydic ... Mia
Leslie Nielsen ... Kay
Kit Zenga Kit Zenga ... Orphan
Darren Moore ... Crazy
Twan Holliday ... Pleatherface (as Twan Holiday)
Ben Cotton ... Fweddy
Travis MacDonald Travis MacDonald ... Hitcher
Lee Tichon ... Michael Crier
Ken Kirzinger ... Mason
Charles Zuckermann Charles Zuckermann ... Needlehead
Jeff Gulka ... Lucky
Chad Krowchuk ... Sully
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Storyline

It's Halloween night, and slacker video clerk Stan Helsing along with his insanely sexy ex-girlfriend , best buddy and an exotic dancer/'massage therapist' - detours into a town cursed by the biggest monsters in movie history: Freddy, Jason , Pinhead , Leatherface , Chucky , & Michael Myers. Written by Anonymous

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis

Taglines:

The most feared monsters in cinematic have met their match.

Genres:

Comedy | Horror

Motion Picture Rating (MPAA)

Rated R for crude and sexual content, some drug use and language | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

View content advisory »
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Details

Country:

Canada | USA

Language:

English

Release Date:

25 March 2010 (Russia) See more »

Also Known As:

Stan Helsing See more »

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Box Office

Cumulative Worldwide Gross:

$1,475,003
See more on IMDbPro »

Company Credits

Show more on IMDbPro »

Technical Specs

Runtime:

| (edited)

Sound Mix:

Dolby Digital | DTS (5.1)

Color:

Color

Aspect Ratio:

1.85 : 1
See full technical specs »
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Did You Know?

Trivia

In China, the film was marketed as the fifth Scary Movie due to the similarity with the franchise. See more »

Goofs

When Stan Helsing is hitting the hockey kid the kids' hockey bat disappears between the shots and appears again in the last shot. See more »

Quotes

[first lines]
Stan Helsing: [picking up a ringing phone] Schlockbuster. Happy Halloween.
[pause]
Stan Helsing: Yeah yeah yeah, we carry porn.
[pause]
Stan Helsing: What do I recommend? Well... "Schindler's Fist", "How Stella Got Her Tube Packed", "Six Degrees of Penatration". This is a good one. "Glad He Ate Her".
[pause]
Stan Helsing: Yeah, yeah, okay. You're welcome, Grandma.
See more »

Crazy Credits

Outtakes play throughout the end credits. See more »

Connections

References King Kong (2005) See more »

Soundtracks

Long White Cross
Written by Milan Borich (as Borich), Arnold, Franklin-Brown, Jordan and Hall
Performed by Pluto
See more »

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User Reviews

 
Quite possible the worst movie I have seen this year.,,,
12 October 2009 | by scottmannen1See all my reviews

Its rare that I actually despise a movie as much as this one. Now before you say I am coming down too hard on this movie...if you don't believe me just watch it. The movie starts out 'ok' like a decent rip off of Scary Movie; however, it quickly descends into a downward whirlpool of bad acting, poor direction and a plot that makes little sense.

Basically this movie is a spoof on horror movies. There were a few parts where I laughed- near the beginning, but after that it seems as though the film budget ran out of money or something because after the halfway point it completely looses direction. I kept expecting a story to develop or some kind of back history on 'Van Helsing' to appear. It didn't. The characters are poorly written...and even with the comedic assistance of Leslie Neilson it still flops hardcore.

Leslie Neilson must be really hard up for acting spots to have taken a spot in this stinker. My recommendation is that you don't watch this one....in fact don't even rent it. Its really that bad.


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