Sun, Jan 3, 2021
A new year. And a new era for THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW, which has been fully digital for EIGHT months in order to provide people with a show that can be enjoyed safely during the pandemic. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka PAT THE RAT aka PAT-A-TAT-TAT aka BABY NEW YEAR) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir To help ring in the new year, George is about to debut his new "look" for 2021. Sound off in the comments if you are into it..
Sun, Jan 10, 2021
SEDITION. INSURRECTION. STORMING THE CAPITOL. It's been quite a week, hasn't it? Now it's time for another new episode of THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW, which has been fully digital since MAY 2020 in order to provide people with a show that can be enjoyed safely during the pandemic by people who are interested in not catching the disease. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka PAT THE RAT aka PIGTRICK OINKOINK aka THE BOOTSCOOTIN' BABY) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir Is this how DEMOCRACY dies? Let's find out..
Sun, Jan 17, 2021
PRESIDENT TRUMP has been impeached. AGAIN. He has now been impeached as many times as there are Ewok movies. Let's hope that we can all make it to Wednesday and move on to the part where he is in court all the time. In other news, THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW (fully digital since MAY 2020) continues to provide safe entertainment while the pandemic rages on killing people at a terrifying rate. PLEASE STAY SAFE. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka PAT THE RAT aka DOXX VADER aka DOXY CARMICHAEL aka MR FREEZE) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir We wrote this crawl a few days ago, so hopefully today wasn't another day of absolute gut-churning chaos and was instead a very good day..
Sun, Jan 24, 2021
AMAIRICAN GRABBUDDIES It's the dawning of a new era. And what better way to celebrate than by watching all all 7 of the BUDDIES feature films: AIR BUDDIES, SNOW BUDDIES, SPACE BUDDIES, SANTA BUDDIES, SPOOKY BUDDIES, TREASURE BUDDIES and SUPER BUDDIES. These are all films about tiny puppy dogs who talk. We have not seen them before. THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW (fully digital since MAY 2020) will be doing this today while raising money for the ASPCA. If you are new to the GLTS, WELCOME. Fans of this show are called GEORGIE PORGIES. The show is hosted by retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) and they are always joined by their producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka L'IL PATTA BUTTER) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir All of the BUDDIES movies can be found on HBO MAX except for SUPER BUDDIES which is on DISNEY+..
Sun, Jan 31, 2021
Whoopi. THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW (fully digital since MAY 2020) is a safe thing to watch while the virus mutates and keeps killing people at an alarming rate. PLEASE WEAR A MASK AND KEEP SOCIAL DISTANCING. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka CLIPTRICK SHIPNOIR aka RIPTRICK GRIPFLIP aka LI'L PATTA BUTTER) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir Hold on to your POTATOES..
Sun, Feb 7, 2021
EPISODE XXIV PRETEND IT'S A SUPER BOWL Thank you for choosing THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW (fully digital since MAY 2020) as your evening's entertainment. We hope you are being smart and safe, because there's still a pandemic happening. PLEASE WEAR A MASK AND KEEP SOCIAL DISTANCING. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka BACKPAT COTMORE aka MOISTRICK SOAKNOIR aka PATRICK COTMORTY) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir There's a button down below that says 'support the show' and tonight would be a great night to help us out. These Grogizmos don't pay for themselves. - THIS WEEK'S GUESTS HEATHER ANNE CAMPBELL BILL OAKLEY.
Sun, Feb 14, 2021
HELLO. Welcome to THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW, fully digital since MAY 2020. It has been a full year since our last in-person theater version of this show. PLEASE WEAR A MASK -- OR TWO. -- AND KEEP SOCIAL DISTANCING. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka BACKPAT COTNOIR aka CHATTY PATTY aka HAT TRICK PATRICK) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir There's a button down below that says 'SUPPORT THE SHOW' and if you would like to give a dollar or two, it would help us pay for some things that make the show funny..
Sun, Feb 21, 2021
We would LOVE to have HARRISON FORD be a guest on this show. But we didn't want to wait until that happens to celebrate his body of work. So, we're doing it TODAY. THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW (fully digital since MAY 2020) will be raising money for one of Harrison Ford's favorite charities, WINGS OF HOPE, a global humanitarian nonprofit that helps bring basic resources to vulnerable communities. The show is hosted by retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) and they are always joined by their producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka FORDTRICK FORDNOIR aka GETTRICK OFFMYPLANENOIR aka REGARDING PATRICK) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir Who are we talking to today, if not HARRISON FORD? We're not telling you. Maybe if you just watch the show instead of askin' a bunch of asinine questions, you'll be happier. I'm just the crawl, they don't tell me nothin.' By the way, my name is CRAWLY. Thanks for never asking. I was in ALL the regular STAR WARS movies and nobody-- I mean, NOBODY-- has ever ONCE asked what my name is. I'm kind of a big deal. Again, my name is CRAWLY and I am the crawl. Maybe someday I'll tell you my first name. Then again, maybe not. It doesn't seem like you care that much..
Sun, Mar 7, 2021
Hello. And welcome to THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW, fully digital since MAY 2020. The pandemic is not yet over. Please keep staying safe and being smart. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka THE MAN WITH NO NICKNAMES) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir Just so's ya know: my name is CRAWLY, and I am the crawl. You've seen me here before. I show you all the words before things get going. I am lonely sometimes, but that's not your problem. See ya next week, I guess.
Sun, Mar 14, 2021
Hi. This is THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW, a thing which used to happen once a month in a theater and now happens once a week as a livestream. Maybe someday it will be an in-person show again, and then someday it will stop being a show entirely. Everything dies, baby, that's a fact. But maybe everything that dies someday comes back? Put your makeup on. Fix your hair up pretty. And meet me tonight in Atlantic City. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka JELL-O BOY aka THE COMEDIAN) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir My name is CRAWLY, and I am the crawl. The ppl in the chat just go nuts for me. They say hello and some of them even try to make plans to meet up with me, but that's impossible. I'm just letters that crawl away, that's all I am and all I will ever be, sadly. Bye-byeeeeeeeeeeeeee for now.
Sun, Mar 21, 2021
Greetings. And welcome to THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW, a digital livestream that is totally normal. But not this week. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka BUMPTRICK BUMPNOIR aka L'IL BUMPER aka THE BUMPBOY) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir Any other week, there would be guests and comedy segments and they would SLOW JAM THE NEWS and do all your favorite bits. But this week SOMETHING WENT WRONG. There was an accident at THE BUMPER FACTORY and BRYSON accidentally made too many BUMPERS and now the whole show is BUMPERS. My name is CRAWLY, and I am the BUMPER. WAIT - That came out wrong. Let me try again. My name is CRAWLY and I am the BUMPER. I didn't mean to say BUMPER. OH NO. I am turning into a BUMPER NOW. My name is BUMPY and I am the BUMPER. - THIS WEEK'S BUMPERS BUMPY BUMPER LADY BUMPINGTON JOEY BUMPERS BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER BUMPER.
Sun, Mar 28, 2021
Hi there. This is THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW, a digital livestream show that has been called "The Internet's Coolest Talk Show" and "The Worst Podcast Ever Made." What a world, huh? Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka BOOPTRICK BOOPNOIR aka L'IL BOOP aka THE BOOPBOY) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir My name is CRAWLY and I am the crawl. I tell you what's what and then I go away and do other stuff that you can't see. I rarely watch this show, is it good? Sound off in the comments if you think this show is good..
Sun, Apr 4, 2021
Hold your applause. It's THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW. Is that what you like to watch? Or are you NEW here? If so, WELCOME. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka BEARTRICK CUBNOIR aka L'IL BEAR aka THE BEARBOY) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir My name is CRAWLY and I am the crawl. They say that I'm wordy and nerdy and tall. They say that I rhyme but that's not true at all. I don't rhyme. That last part was a goddamn coincidence..
Sat, Aug 21, 2021
Welcome to THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW MID-AUGUST SUPERSUMMER SPECIAL. It's the show we do once every AUGUST 2021, meaning this is the only time it happens. You are LUCKY to be seeing this at all. Almost everyone else who has ever lived is DEAD, and we are the only ones who are alive RIGHT NOW. So, let's have some FUUUUUUUUUUUN, right? ALSO: if you haven't gotten vaccinated yet and you *can* get vaccinated, you should get vaccinated, ok, please? Please. Alright, now here is an explanation of what this show is: Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (co-lead on AMAZON's THE TICK, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka HAT BOY aka HAT MAN aka THE MAD HATTERBOY) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir Together they do a talk show. Kind of a razor-thin premise, no? Still, most talk shows seem to stop world-building at "this show happens at night" or "this is a daytime one." My name is CRAWLY and I am the crawl. You might remember me from our last episode, which was 95% crawl. This time, this is all you get, just this part. Sorry, Crawldads. By the way, these four dots I always do at the very end? Those are my POOPS..
Sat, Sep 25, 2021
EPISODE XXXV PRETEND IT'S A JOKEY Welcome to JOKE WEEK on THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW. Georgie Porgies have been waiting all year for one of the most beloved annual traditions of all time, when jokes RULE and serious things DROOL. Knock-knock. Who's there? An umasked vaccine skeptic. An unmasked vaccine skeptic WHO? An unmasked vaccine skeptic who is FURIOUS that nobody wants to be around me. It's not FAIR!!!. LET ME IN. [He dies several days later, R.I.P.] OK, now here is the part where I explain what this show is: Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (ORKO on Netflix's MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE: REVELATION, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (aka aka aka ) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir It's a TALK SHOW, and that's enough of an explanation that you shouldn't need anything else to make sense of it. My name is JOKEY and I am the joke. Just kidding. I'm CRAWLY and I am the crawl, but that's a good example of the kind of fun we're gonna be having this week..
Fri, Oct 8, 2021
EPISODE XXXVI SPECIAL COMIC-CON EDITION PRETEND IT'S A GHOSTY Welcome THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW 2021 NEW YORK COMIC CON PANEL. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (ORKO on Netflix's MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE: REVELATION, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (COMICK CONOIR aka GHOSTRICK BUSTNOIR aka PANELTRICK BADGENOIR) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW ran for 6 years at the UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE until the pandemic caused them to transition to a livestream show on PLANET SCUM DOT LIVE. This panel is their first in-person appearance together on stage since FEBRUARY 2020. My name is CRAWLY and I am the crawl. NYCC scheduled our panel up against the GHOSTBUSTERS: AFTERLIFE panel, so we are using this opportunity to counterprogram with a celebration of the 5th anniversary of 2016's GHOSTBUSTERS: ANSWER THE CALL. In the spirit of the Ghostbusters multiverse, we are also announcing our own TOTALLY UNRELATED franchise about living humans who hunt the spirits of the dead, since that is an extremely broad concept that no one studio or corporation can claim legal ownership of. THIS PANEL'S GUESTS ZACH CHERRY JAMES III.
Fri, Oct 22, 2021
EPISODE XXXVII PRETEND IT'S A TRICKY (OR A TREATY) BOO. Did I scare you? I am a G'hosta. Just kidding. What is this, JOKE WEEK? It isn't. It's not Joke Week. Joke Week isn't until September 2022. Welcome to THE GEORGE LUCAS TALK SHOW. Retired filmmaker GEORGE LUCAS (dead-eyed character actor CONNOR RATLIFF) and his talk show sidekick WATTO (ORKO on Netflix's MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE: REVELATION, GRIFFIN NEWMAN) are joined, as always, by producer PATRICK COTNOIR (PATRICK COTREAT aka TRICKTRICK TREATNOIR aka BOO-TRICK BOO-TNOIR) whose druthers include you following him on TWITTER: @patrickcotnoir It's just a totally normal talk show except now it's Halloween (aka HALLOWATTO) and that means maybe tonight's show will be TERRIFYING? Or not. Who knows? It only just started. My name is CRAWLY and I am the crawl. You may recognize me from the recent GLTS Special Edition of BLEAK HOUSE by CHARLES DICKENS, which some are calling "The Book Of The Year." Personally, I think it's not my best work. Nobody did the proper proofreading. You GOTTA proofread, y'know? Otherwise, you make embarrassing mistakes that can never be fully repaired, even with future printings. Anyway, here goes the show. I hope it's a good one. Wouldn't it be nice to watch something GOOD? Let's see how they do, with the help of. - TONIGHT'S SPECIAL GUEST SAM RICHARDSON VERONICA OSORIO.