- Peter Griffin: Ground Zero. So this is were the first guy got AIDS.
- Brian Griffin: Peter, this is the site of the 9/11 terrorist attacks.
- Peter Griffin: Oh, so Saddam Hussein did this?
- Brian Griffin: No.
- Peter Griffin: The Iraqi army?
- Brian Griffin: No.
- Peter Griffin: Some guys from Iraq?
- Brian Griffin: No.
- Peter Griffin: That one lady who visited Iraq that one time?
- Brian Griffin: No! Peter, Iraq had nothing to do with this. It was a bunch of Saudi Arabians, Lebanese, and Egyptians, financed by a Saudi Arabian guy living in Afghanistan and sheltered by Pakistanis.
- Peter Griffin: So, you're saying we need to invade Iran?
- Peter Griffin: You wanna hurt me? Go right ahead if it makes you feel any better. I'm an easy target. Yeah, you're right, I talk too much. I also listen too much. I could be a cold-hearted cynic like you... but I don't like to hurt people's feelings. Well, you think what you want about me; I'm not changing. I like... I like me. My kids like me. My friends like me. 'Cause I'm the real article. What you see is what you get.
- Chris Griffin: Haha, movie references.
- [the Griffins decide to call Joe to check on Stewie. Joe is cleaning his wheelchair]
- Joe Swanson: THIS IS MY WHEELCHAIR! THERE ARE MANY LIKE IT, BUT THIS ONE IS MINE! WITHOUT ME, MY WHEELCHAIR IS USELESS! WITHOUT MY WHEELCHAIR, *I* AM USELESS!
- [phone rings]
- Joe Swanson: SHUT UP!
- Phone: Okay!
- Stewie Griffin: Someone's left the Fridge Door open, that's irresponsible. I guess I'm going to find out what soda's like. Wow! That must be the Sugar! Oh, Rupert, I think I'm going to run, catch me!
- [Giggles and runs in circles, then stops]
- Stewie Griffin: Ah, now I'm sad...