Road of No Return (2009) Poster

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3/10
A Peculiar Disappointment
maxtrack30 October 2010
Where to begin, there were so many problems with this movie.

The written dialogue was often weak filler and the delivery was frequently unnatural. Almost as if the moments where the actors were exploring how to deliver the dialogue were captured and used to create the movie. At times there was dialogue when it wasn't needed.

Generally, a movie is good if the audience is not "aware" they are watching a movie. Thus when something in a movie forces the viewer to stop watching and think, it isn't a good movie. At one point in this film a character commits an action they regret right away, yet their dialogue states they didn't know *something* before they committed the action. However the character should still not know the *something*, yet they are lamenting what they have done because of the effect on *something*, which is unknown to them. Like a chunk of the movie is missing to explain what was going on, but actually it was just poorly written, in my estimation.

The big name actors both seem to be having a bad day on set, for almost the entire film. Michael Madsen & David Carradine are so very good in Kill Bill (1&2) yet somehow it seems they made no effort in Road of No Return. It is as if we are watching two actors who just happen to look like Madsen and Carradine, but lack their talent. Maybe they just could not get into their roles, perhaps the characters felt too similar to the characters they portrayed in Kill Bill.

Over acting and under acting were not the only weaknesses. The framing, lighting and dead end quality of some scenes creates an ongoing internal dialogue in the viewer. The voice in the mind of the audience is often saying things like: "Why did they shoot that scene in such a strange way?" "What was the value of that line of dialogue?" "Is this supposed to be a comedy?" "Why are the only good scenes the ones where someone is talking to the child actor?" "Is this whole movie a bizarre parody of a movie?" "Am I on candid camera as I watch this movie?"

The special effects are so lame the are almost non existent. With so much gun fire I was left wondering why there were so many poorly produced effects connected to gun fire? Less gun fire done well would have been a better idea.

Conceptually, the story line worked well, it was just the execution that sucked. (pardon the pun) In fact, the only reason I kept watching was to see how the story line played out.

Were the actors that bad or was there something else going on which caused this production to turn into card board cut out characters? I'm still not certain, but it felt like something was restricting all of the performances as they could not have all been uniformly bad actors.

In the end, this is a great movie for use in learning how NOT to shoot a movie.
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3/10
Thought this movie was a comedy
ambgraal7 August 2023
I caught this movie on my tv like 30 minutes into the actual movie, I thought it was supposed to be a comedy but after looking it up I realized the movie was supposed to be a serious action/thriller. You will probably like the movie a lot more if you take it less serious, but overall it's still pretty bad. The characters I guess were trying to be interesting but overall they were just goofy. It's pretty clear this movie was trying to go for a good mix of action/comedy but they just suck at doing what they were trying to do and could not mix these two together. They were trying to do what Pulp Fiction does but did it worse on every level. Surprised I caught this movie in 2023 because it feels like something that would just be completely forgotten. Watch the movie if you like to laugh at how mediocre it is, that's about it.
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3/10
A Medicore Action Movie
bigbadjohn-460343 June 2019
This movie was a disappointment to watch as it had a poorly written script and the acting was average at best despite several well known actors. The cinematography and special effects were however mostly good.
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2/10
Why Cheap Political Statements and Movies Don't Mix
Anonymous_Maxine6 March 2009
Warning: Spoilers
Road of No Return is notable more than anything else for having signs of a great cast despite a pathetically awful script. The movie poster has some promise, with Michael Madsen and David Carradine posing opposite each other in a picture that seems to promise a gritty and powerful action drama, but such is not to be the case. This thing is so bad that it's amazing that it ever got made at all, much less that stars of such caliber as Madsen and Carradine signed on.

The story concerns a group of hit men who have been hired by a group of shady businessmen. The hit men are all interchangeable caricatures, paper-thin stereotypes that are thrown together and spend the majority of the movie in close quarters getting to know each other and sharing their feelings. Soon it is revealed that the men that hired them are government officials who are forced to fly under the radar to take out some major drug dealers because those pesky liberal laws prevent them from really being able to do their jobs.

The fact that the movie is based on a government agency that has to hide their dealings from Washington in order to avoid getting in trouble for doing their jobs does not speak well for the coherence of the script, since at one point David Carradine's character explains that Washington has authorized them to use "extreme measures" against drug traffickers.

Complicating matters is the fact that the hired hit men noted one of their license plates during the hiring process and are looking into the backgrounds of their employers. A bunch of nonsense follows and ultimately everyone is put into a position where the hit men want to get paid and the men that hired them decide that the only way they can safely get out of the whole thing is to kill all of them. Clean the cleaners, as it were.

Oh, and did I mention the kids? Early in the film, two of the hit men pull off a multiple homicide which leaves two young girls stranded and with nowhere to go, so the hit men take them in and take turns being bizarre father figures for them. I love the thought that went into this. The girls were at one point about to be sold into sexual slavery by the bad guys, but the good bad guys take them in.

One of the girls is killed (or taken away or something, I can't remember and don't care to go back and find out), leaving only one of them, a young girl of about ten years old. Here's a little exchange that should reveal something about the kind of script that this movie comes from. One day, she's relaxing in a hotel room with two of the hit men, and one of them leans over and starts doing lines of cocaine off the bedside table. When the girl gets upset, he sits up, concerned, and asks, "What's the matter?" He seems genuinely confused.

The end credits of Road of No Return inform us that the movie is written and directed by "Dr." Parviz Saghizadeh. I have no idea what kind of doctor this person is, but I can tell you that it is not a doctor of philosophy, otherwise he would have noticed the pathetic shallowness of the political nonsense that this movie tries to pass on. David Carradine's character ham-handedly delivers it in this charming bit of dialogue:

"How the hell did we get into this mess anyhow? It's those damn liberals. If we had tough laws and tough judges with balls enough to put these drug traffickers behind bars and throw away the keys…"

So you see, it's all the liberals' fault that they were forced to hire hit men and that those poor kids got blown up in that car bomb and that the girls had no parents and were going to be sold into child prostitution and the whole world is just coming apart. I have a question though, who's fault is it that this mess of a movie got made?
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2/10
Unwatchable past the first 15 minutes
killbot101012 July 2009
First off, the characters in this movie made me laugh. A black guy that holds his gun sideways and somewhat dresses like shaft, a redneck Nazi from NJ (huh?!), an Arabic guy, and a native American hit-man. only one believable was the Arabic guy. Everybody else were clowns. especially the white guy. Not to mention all of these guys are suppose to be "professionals". who the hell holds a gun sideways, then shoots different later on in the movie?? The story has holes and seemed to be written by a 16 year old kid. The acting was horrible along with the camera work. I Just couldn't bring myself to watch anymore of the movie after 15-20 Min's so I turned it off. Amateur film makers should learn from this movie and see what NOT to do.
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1/10
Crap!
iaxlist7 February 2010
Warning: Spoilers
This movie is terrible, the negative reviews are spot on.

Unbelievable characters and a stupid story. Even if the DEA could hire hit men that would kill every single drug dealer in the country, there is no way they would do it.

They would be destroying their own jobs.

Also, what was up with kids? Unless its going to be super awesome most child actors suck.

One weird thing, all the people who gave this a positive review have all only reviewed one other movie, Capitalism: A Love Story. That seems sort of suspect to me. What are the odds...
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2/10
Uninspired and Dull
nightcity17 February 2010
I saw a reasonable review for this movie and this combined with two well known actors persuaded me to give it a chance. Bad mistake, the characters were paper thin, the action was boring and badly executed, and the plot/script was very weak.

Caradine and Madsen were not the main characters (from length of time on the screen anyway) and so the film didn't really benefit greatly from their presence. I wasn't expecting a dumb action movie but that would have been preferable to what I did see, which was mostly dull and uninspired.

There were several attempts at comedy in the movie that I thought just didn't work very well. When I see Indie films they are quite often hit or miss and I often love or hate them, this one I just didn't like much. As a final thought, I think someone likened this film to Pulp Fiction but while there may have been some vague attempt at copying that style, sadly it falls far, far, far short of that movie.
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Starts off okay, then goes slowly downhill
Wizard-818 February 2010
"Road Of No Return" was one of the last movies David Carradine made before his death. Curious about if he was still able to give an entertaining performance at this time like his past performances was one reason why I rented it. Another reason was that Michael Madsen was also in the movie. The front of the DVD box seems to suggest that they are the two lead actors in the movie, but that isn't so - they are given supporting roles. Not only that, I noticed that though they share several scenes together, not once do you see both actors at the same time. (Obviously, they were each filmed at separate times and edited together later.) And Carradine looks very old and tired in all of his scenes.

I probably could have lived with those facts had the rest of the movie been entertaining, but in actual fact there's not much entertaining here. The movie has a sense of humor that is occasionally amusing, but is mostly loud and tiresome. While the movie is decently shot on a poverty row budget, the other production values are often flawed, with stuff like one shot being repeated, stock footage, and obvious post-dubbed dialogue. But the biggest problem is that the movie eventually comes to a slow crawl, and it's tiresome making the slow slog to the end. Some more gratuitous action and pruning down of scenes would have helped considerably.
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1/10
Truth - this movie sucks ass
henry-33322 February 2011
I'm also kinda surprised with the couple of five star reviews ... they truly have not judged this on peer movies that it apes or aspires towards. The film maker drove a few pegs into the wall: hire some banner actors, do some (great) static shots of desert and rail cars .... the premise had so much promise here, what could have been done. Watching the film, it was obviously a rock-bottom budget attempt at milking the Tarantino theme, and the props, stage sets and so on were just pathetic. Continuity was rank, acting was wooden at best, script was just awful ..... really, the waste of talent, manpower, money and audience loyalty was tragic. I watched to the end, and kept muttering to myself; I wish - given the great pedigrees from Madsen and Carradine - that this had been done by a real script writer and a pro director. Trust me, this film is a real stinker.
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6/10
fun dark serio comedy
asinyne6 March 2017
This was pretty entertaining. Definitely borrows heavily from Pulp Fiction but thats not a bad thing. There is some silliness but I felt entertained. Its pretty violent and the violence is well staged. There is enough action for action fans. Carridine and Madsen had some fun scenes together and I enjoyed watching them play off each other. Very tongue in cheek. Heck, its a decent movie. The plot is wild but not bad. There were some very amusing scenes and all the madness kinda works for the most part. A different kind of madcap action flick. Pretty good. I watched almost until the end when a jackash co worker knocked my portable DVD player over when he tripped on the cord. Kinda fitting way to wrap up the fun.
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8/10
A thinking man's action film
paulphoto28 February 2010
I liked this film not b/c it had spectacular action sequences but b/c it was a thinking man's action film, it had heart, it had characters that had a past and had something to say. You don't usually see that with Hollywood films in particular action films. So it was quite refreshing specially that you don't expect it. But I must say that I was a bit disappointed that Carradine and Madsen's time on screen was limited but I think others did a really good job carrying the film. However, the production value at times was weak, you could see that it had been made on a shoe-string budget. It was definitely an indie film and it showed but I like low budget indie films. The film worked for me and left an impression. If you don't like dialog this film is not for you.
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9/10
Loved it – Maybe more Doctors should write screenplays
stevemj19 July 2009
I really liked this film. Real slick dialogue and likable characters. It reminded me of Pulp Fiction. Thought the story needed a bit more work and emphasis on drug trafficking but overall really good film. In particular I liked the encounters between the four hit men and how they all come around. It is really a story of coming face to face with your own demons and redeeming yourself. Carradine was really good so as the little girl and the hit men. One of the reviewers mentioned that the screenwriter is a doctor of some sort. If that's the case I hope more doctors write screenplays b/c I thought the lines were really smart and refreshing. If you can, see it in English b/c some of its effects will be surely lost in translation.
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9/10
Only smart people can like this.
jolex61625 July 2010
It started off really slow. I was debating on weather i should take it off or not. Horrible acting & plot was all that was bobbling in my mind. But i decided to give it a chance. Which is where all you idiots who gave up on this movie went wrong. Now im not gonna bore anyone by running down the entire film, but all i have to say is this. Im the kind of person who will analyze a movie when its done. I ask myself why did i waste my time watching this crap. Well you know what? I didn't have to worry this time. Yes it may have had some bad acting. Yes Michael Madson wasn't the main attraction, but when it ended, i thought to myself, it was well worth watching, and not as bad as i thought it would be. As a matter of fact, it was very intelligent and well done, from start to finish. It made me feel good, and put a smile on my face. For those who gave up on this film, read my post and give it another chance. And if you do, and still didn't like it, well go cry me a river....thats your problem!
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10/10
Great Film - Finally an Intelligent Action Film
mikepavarian996 July 2009
I was pleasantly surprised when I saw this film. I expected a typical brainless action flick with Carradine and Madsen. But, what I saw was quite well written and intelligent. I must admit it is not your typical action film so if you are looking for a dumb action packed film, this movie is not for you. For an action film it is a bit talkie but the dialogue is very well written, funny and smart. It covers a wide range of topics from religion to politics to racism all within the context of the interaction between the hit men. The characters are also very vivid and unforgettable. Even though they are stereotypical but it seems it was meant to be that way to draw our attention to the problem of stereotyping in our society and that there is hope for all of us to come together regardless of our ethnicity, religion or skin color. I give it two thumps up for great dialogue, great characters and solid acting.
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8/10
Really good film, refreshing, smart and funny
kevin1019785 August 2009
I thought it was a really good film, clever and funny. This film was really about human relations touching on all aspects of life that affect us all such as religion, racism, nationalism, etc. The drug trafficking was just an instrument to bring these characters together. And I agree with the other reviewer that it was a conscious decision on part of the filmmaker to make the characters totally stereotypical. It worked for me. It was hilarious and drove the message home. Also the film had many heart-felt scenes and moments that tend to stay with you. The characters also stay with you. They were pretty likable and fun to watch. Having said all that, I think the film would have benefited from developing the story a bit more around the drug trafficking.
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10/10
A Beautiful film with a great message
katemuller20009 July 2009
Warning: Spoilers
I thought road of no return was a great character driven film. Rare to see films like that. I can't believe the first reviewer. Come on guys don't just watch, listen too. Great dialogue is far more interesting than silly far fetched action scenes. The movie has so many memorable and great scenes. I particularly liked the scenes with the missionaries – I thought that scene was classic and so funny and well written – and the diner scene with the chicken – another classic and funny scene. Another moving scene was the little girl waving goodbye to the hit men outside the motel room. That made me choke. And of course the ending scene which I cannot talk about. So beautiful and unexpected. Though I didn't much care for carradine or madsen but I thought the hit men and mom and that adorable little girl were absolutely wonderful. This movie has a bit of everything, drama, action, humor, sharp and gutsy dialogue, tender moments and strong sociopolitical message. And it WORKS! I look forward to seeing more movies from this director.
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10/10
Great Intelligent film – But this film is Not for Dumb folks
davidearth718 July 2009
I saw this film by chance because I am not necessarily a fan of carradine or madsen or action films for that matter. But I was quite surprised. I really enjoyed this film. It had great dialogue and good characters. But I think the flaw with this film is that because of Madsen and Carradine it draws a certain type of viewers who are less sophisticated and expect cheap action films. And I really think this movie is not an action film and is more of an extremely dark comedy with a lot of great intelligent dialogue that as one of the other reviewers mentioned covers everything from religion to politics to racism to stereotyping and more. In my opinion it should have had a different cast in place of carradine and madsen to draw more mature, educated and more indie film goers. By the way, you can shoot your gun sideways and you see that in the movies all the time.
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