Going the Distance (2010)

Charlie Day: Dan

Photos 

Quotes 

• Dan : When I suck my dick, I lie on my back, I throw my legs over my head.

  Box : You suck your own dick?

  Dan : Yeah.

  Box : You cut your own hair and you suck your own dick. You're like a Swiss army knife.

• Dan : Now what is the story, though, with you guys? Are you doing it, like, monogamous or what's the deal?

  Garrett : Yeah. I don't know. Uh... Maybe, yeah.

  Box : "Maybe"? Wow, okay. You know what "maybe" gets you? It gets her sucking every dude's dick out there at Stanford. It really does. And then you go out there and you visit her. And then you have to kiss that blowjob factory she calls a mouth.

  Garrett : Thank you for that visual. Thanks, pal.

  Dan : That was, like, way graphic. That was, like, extremely graphic.

• Box : Now, look, I have done the long distance thing. And it is hard. As hell. And it doesn't matter how good the relationship is, it literally can just rip it apart. Look, it is just very hard to be away from the person you love for months at a time.

  Garrett : I know. I know it's not gonna be easy.

  Box : That's all I'm sayin'.

  Dan : But maybe YOU never found the right girl.

  Garrett : That's not a bad point.

• Box : You get in a relationship but you don't *ever* fully commit.

  Dan : Right.

  Box : You never have, not since I've known you. And then the girl figures that out and then she splits. And then we have to sit here and listen to you be *surprised* about that. Over and over again.

  Dan : All the time.

  Box : This happens a lot.

  Garrett : Not true. It happens occasionally.