Tucker and Dale vs Evil (2010)

Tyler Labine: Dale

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Dale : You thought I looked like some kind of freak?

  Allison : We misjudged you Dale. I'm... I'm really sorry.

  Dale : Don't be sorry, it's my fault. I should have known if a guy like me talked to a girl like you, somebody would end up dead.

• Dale : Do some of your friends take medication?

  Allison : Why?

  Dale : Because I think they forgot to take it.

• Dale : [the sheriff is stumbling around with a board nailed to his skull]  How is he even walking right now, Tuck?

  Tucker : He looks like he's gonna walk it off, he's gonna be fine!

• Tucker : All right... I know what this is.

  Dale : What?

  Tucker : This is a suicide pact.

  Dale : It's a what?

  Tucker : These kids are coming out here, and killing themselves all over the woods.

  Dale : My God, that makes so much sense.

• Dale : [after a spear lands between his legs]  I never thought I'd say this, but I'm glad I'm not hung like a bear.

• Tucker : [hands him a nail gun]  Cover me.

  Dale : I ain't never shot at nobody before.

  Tucker : If it helps, think of 'em like moving two-by-fours.

• Dale : [Allison is terrified of him when he first comes into her room]  Uh-oh-oh, it's the pancakes! You don't like pancakes, I will get you sumpin' else!

• Dale : [after seeing Tucker's fingers wrapped in his shirt]  Oh my God, they cut off his bowling fingers!

• Dale : You want a killer hillbilly? I'll show you a killer hillbilly.

• Tucker : What am I supposed to say, Dale? "Oh hidy-ho officer! We've had a doozy of a day. There we were minding our own business, just doing chores around the house when kids started killing themselves all over my property."

  Dale : Yeah, yeah, just like that.

  Tucker : They're never gonna believe that.

  Dale : But that's exactly what happened!

• Allison : I have this stupid dream...

  Dale : Dreams are not stupid.

• Dale : [when going for the last beer]  That's okay Tuck. You take that. It's yours.

  Tucker : See that's why you're never gonna get ahead in life. It's cause you don't stick up for yourself.

  Dale : [Dale reaching for last beer, Tucker smacks Dale's hand]  "OW!"

  Tucker : Do not even think about it.

  Dale : But you just said...

  Tucker : Are you kidding me?

  Dale : [Tucker smacks Dale's hand]  "OW!"

  Tucker : Are you serious?

  [snaps open beer top] 

  Tucker : What'd I just say?

  Dale : You said I gotta stick up for myself.

  Tucker : I said "don't even think about it, though" That was the last thing I said.

• Allison : What was that?

  Dale : Anthemis nobilis

  Allison : Huh?

  Dale : It's the ingredient in camomile tea that causes allergic reactions in rare cases... Like I said, I remember weird stuff.

• Chad : It's time for you to feel *my* pain!

  Dale : I'm ready, frat bitch!

• Dale : I told you, Tucker. I'm a zero with the ladies... they hate my face!

• Tucker : [Dale is attracted to one of the college co-eds at the gas station, but hesitates to try to go talk to her]  She's just human. Why don't you go over and talk to her?

  Dale : Talk to her? What... What in the world would I say?

  Tucker : I don't know... Tell her that you got a vacation home. That'll probably impress her.

  Dale : Are you out of your mind, Tucker? They're college girls, and they grew up with vacation homes and guys like me fixing their toilets!

  Tucker : You've gotta' have some faith in yourself, man. Girls can *smell* fear. Now, come on! You are a good lookin' man... more or less. You got a damned good heart. I mean, that's two things right there. Now go on, get over there! What... what's the worst that could happen?

• Dale : How you feelin'?

  Tucker : I am feeling high on prescription medication.

• Dale : That's a PBR, buddy.

  Tucker : That-that's a thing of beauty.

• Allison : What am I doing here?

  Dale : Oh. You don't remember? Me and Tucker... I mean, I and Tucker... I mean, Tucker and I... We brung you here last night.