Glee (TV Series)

Theatricality (2010)

Lea Michele: Rachel Berry

Photos 

Quotes 

• Rachel Berry : Mom?

  Shelby Corcoran : Hon, you gotta stop sneaking into these rehearsals.

  Rachel Berry : It's kind of important.

  Shelby Corcoran : [Rachel shows her her Lady Gaga outfit]  Oh, dear god.

  Rachel Berry : My dads can't sew. I really need a mom right now. Do you think you can help?

• Mercedes Jones : Rachel kind of got some intense news yesterday.

  Quinn Fabray : We were spying on Vocal Adrenaline, and...

  Will Schuester : You guys, that's not fair! You gotta stop doing that. But, uh, you know, what... what'd you find out?

  Mercedes Jones : Okay, y'all ready? Miss Corcoran, their coach? She's Rachel's mom.

  Will Schuester : Are you serious?

  Artie Abrams : Way to bury the lead, Mercedes.

  Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : We're screwed. Rachel's gonna jump ship over to Vocal Adrenaline.

  Rachel Berry : [entering]  Never. I really don't want to talk about it, though. I'm still processing the news. And my dads are moving my therapist to our spare room later this afternoon. All I know is that I'm not going anywhere, and I've chosen a Lady Gaga look the longing for a childhood I was deprived of.

  Brittany S. Pierce : You look terrible. I look awesome.

  Mercedes Jones : I think it's the Kermit the Frog look.

  Kurt Hummel : [a stuffed animal falls off Rachel's dress]  And we have a jumper.

  Rachel Berry : Well, my dads can't sew, so these are just stapled on.

  Will Schuester : Guys, why don't we worry about this later and maybe try to focus on the song?

• Rachel Berry : Guys, we have a serious problem. You know how I've been doing some deep background on Vocal Adrenaline?

  Artie Abrams : Isn't that against the rules?

  Rachel Berry : No, not at all. Or probably. Whatever! Anyway, what I figured out; I rooted through the dumpsters behind the Carmel auditorium and I found eighteen empty boxes of Christmas lights.

  Tina Cohen-Chang : Oh, no.

  Rachel Berry : Which led me to Joelle Fabrics. I asked them about red Chantilly lace, and they were sold out.

  Mercedes Jones : Oh, sweet Jesus.

  Kurt Hummel : Oh, my.

  Will Schuester : Wait, wait, wait. What?

  Kurt Hummel : They're doing Gaga.

  Mercedes Jones : That's it. It's over.

  Rachel Berry : Exactly.

  Kurt Hummel : We should have guessed it. They're going for full-out theatricality. They know it's the easiest way to beat us. Damn them.

• Artie Abrams : It makes sense that Vocal Adrenaline would pay homage. It's a brilliant move. She's a perfect fit for them.

  Will Schuester : Hold on a second. We might be able to kill two birds with one stone here. We can help Tina find a new look and find a competitive number for regionals. This week, your assignment: Gaga.

  [the students all gasp and mutter in excitement] 

  Rachel Berry : Pens. We need pens. My ideas just come to me.

  Will Schuester : Uh, my office. Right there.

  Rachel Berry : I'm brainstorming. It's coming.

• Rachel Berry : I'm tired of everyone calling us freaks.

  Mercedes Jones : [snickering]  Well, look at us. We are freaks.

  [the glee club all shares a laugh] 

  Finn Hudson : But we're all freaks together. And we shouldn't have to hide it.

  [they turn around as they hear clapping, revealing Schue] 

  Will Schuester : Nice job, Finn. I think you just figured out what the lesson was. Kinda makes me wish I had planned it. But Mercedes is right. You do all look incredibly insane.

• Shelby Corcoran : So, how'd your dads come up with the name Rachel?

  Rachel Berry : They were, um, big "Friends" fans. I know why you're here. To say goodbye.

  Shelby Corcoran : I really wanted this to work. Do you know what really turned me? That story that you told me about your dads, and how they'd bring you water when you were sad. We're never gonna have anything like that. It's too late for us. I just think that anything we share right now is gonna be confusing for you.

  Rachel Berry : I just don't understand. You... you're my mom. I feel awful right now, and I should want to fall into your arms and let you rock me and tell me everything is gonna be fine, but... I just don't feel it.

  Shelby Corcoran : It's because I'm your mother, but I'm not your mom.

  Rachel Berry : So, what? Do we just pretend we don't know each other now?

  Shelby Corcoran : That seems silly. Let's just be grateful for one another, from afar. For a while. Don't think for a second I'm gonna soft on you during regionals.

  Rachel Berry : Bring it.

• Rachel Berry : Did you ever regret it?

  Shelby Corcoran : Yes. Then no. Then so much.

  Rachel Berry : W... when did you realize it was the right time for me to find you?

  Shelby Corcoran : I saw you sing at sectionals. You were extraordinary. You were me.

  Rachel Berry : Was it hard for you to not become a star? To not have your dreams come true?

  Shelby Corcoran : It felt liked a broken promise. Like the Fisher King's wound; never heals.

  Rachel Berry : Wow. Genetics really are amazing. You see the world with the same fierce theatricality as I do. Even the way we're sitting right now is so dramatic, and yet we feel so comfortable with it.

  Shelby Corcoran : I've missed so much. How do you feel?

  Rachel Berry : Thirsty. When I was little and I used to get sad, my dads would bring me a glass of water. It got so I couldn't tell if I was sad or just thirsty.

  Shelby Corcoran : Uh... I shouldn't have done this.

  [standing to leave] 

  Shelby Corcoran : This was supposed to feel good. W... we were supposed to have some kind of slow-motion run into each other's arms. This is all wrong.

  Rachel Berry : Maybe we can just go to dinner or something, just to get over the initial shock?

  Shelby Corcoran : I'm so sorry, Rachel. Uh... I'll... I'll call you.

• Rachel Berry : Ms. Corcoran? I'm Rachel Berry. I'm your daughter.