- Jay takes Phil on a model-airplane excursion with disastrous results. While Manny is at their house, Claire must get used to the fact they are actually siblings.
- After some nudging, Jay begrudgingly takes Phil out to fly his new model airplane -- that is until a maneuver goes awry. Meanwhile, when Gloria drops Manny off to play with Luke, she ends up volunteering to take Alex dress shopping, and Claire finds herself sitting down for an unexpected brother and sister heart-to-heart with Manny.—- courtesy of ABC Press
- When you have a patriarch married to someone younger than his kids, who has a child of her own, a daughter who's husband can't relate to him, and a son who can't bring his husband around for football, to say bonding is tricky is an understatement. However, perhaps it is time to try. Claire still has problems with Alex, since she refuses to wear a dress to an upcoming wedding and insists on being confrontational about it. She also has to deal with Haley, who is the prototypical 15 year old teenager, and Luke, who needs to come out of his box more often and keep his pants on outside.
Jay, Gloria, and Manny come over to the house. Claire tells Gloria about her situation, and Gloria tries to help out as Alex's "grandmother" by taking her shopping. The usually-cynical Alex resists, of course, but Gloria tries her best to make it like just the girls going out. Jay relaxes with his model airplane, and Phil does his usual job of trying too hard to ingratiate himself with Jay. He thinks Jay can't handle the fact that, being the silverback papa ape, this new stud comes in beating his chest and is taking away one of his females. Phil is not the enemy: poachers are. Still, Jay lets him help with the model airplane and asks Phil out of kindness if he wants to fly it. Gloria will take Alex out on the town, and Claire gets to stay home and watch Manny.
Mitchell and Cameron are exploring the successful cornerstone of any modern family: the Costco. Actually, it was Cameron's suggestion, as Mitchell thinks it's a bit beneath him. (Yeah, you know where this is going. I'm single, and even I know.) Cameron feels that Mitchell is being too snobbish, but the diapers are supposedly a better bargain there. They even have a wine section. It's right next to the tires. A few eye rolls by Mitchell, and he's ready to leave. That is, until he discovers a paper shredder he really wanted for a great price. Suddenly, the place is heaven. They buy olives, since Claire needs them and they can't eat 3 one-gallon jars of them anyway. They can even buy a coffin there. (They can?) Mitchell realizes the store has everything you need from birth to death. They buy 4 huge boxes of diapers, a year's worth, along with a shed to put them in at the house, since you can buy those there as well. Cameron has created a monster.
CAMERON: I'm just like Costco. I'm big, I'm not fancy, and I dare you to not like me.
Jay and Phil are having fun flying the remote-control model airplane. Well, Phil is. He sees the peacefulness of flying a plane and insists on talking to Jay about it constantly. Jay suggests doing a "thread the needle," where Jay will fly the plane through a hoop that Phil holds. Jay missed, and nailed Phil in the nose with the plane. It was by accident, as far as Jay was concerned.
Gloria sits down to lunch with Alex. Alex is hesitant at first to talk to Gloria, but Gloria gets her to open up by saying she'll answer any questions Alex has. Of course, Alex knows you can't really do this, based on her experience with her mom. However, Alex's first question is answered without hesitation: she slept with 8 men. She also has a couple of tattoos, one of which is only accessible to Jay, but Gloria figures she's gotten Alex to open up enough so she doesn't have to describe her piercings. Gloria hits her with finding out why Alex won't wear a dress. Alex doesn't want to end up like Haley, she thinks she's the smart one and therefore it's OK that she isn't pretty. But Gloria points out the busboy was being very attentive to them and Alex is the reason why. She'll want to date a cute guy some day and she'll want to wear that dress. Alex gets it.
ALEX: Have you ever kissed a woman?
GLORIA: That's no way to talk to your grandmother.
The Claire/Manny conversation was, to say the least, interesting. Manny complimented her on the cookies she was baking, which helped disarm the fact that they were, technically, brother and sister. Well of the step variety, but Gloria says "step" means "not real" and they're a real family. Claire's cynicism starts to break down a bit when Manny asks why Claire is sad.
MANNY: Ugh, kids. You don't have to tell me. My school is full of them.
Claire is upset that Alex has to turn everything into a fight, which Manny says reminds him of someone he knows, who is sitting in front of him. Manny thinks Alex is trying to forge her own identity, and wearing a dress for even one afternoon could ruin that. Claire admits finding it hard that Manny is only 10, although his milk mustache might help. Eventually, she's opening up more than a guest on Dr. Phil at the end of the show. Claire finally agrees that Alex doesn't have to wear a dress to the wedding, and Alex smugly shows off the dress she bought.
CLAIRE: You see? You see how she provokes me?
MANNY: We'll talk about it next week.
Jay drops Phil off, bringing his nose in a separate bag. Claire is beside herself because she knows Jay did the "thread the needle" miss on purpose. She hates that Jay never took to Phil and she is ready to throw him out of the house. Jay finally relents and apologizes to Phil, saying that he actually likes him. Unfortunately for Jay, Phil is under the influence of a lot of painkillers and sits on Jay's lap for a big hug. This of course is the time for Mitchell and Cameron to arrive, and Cameron gets on Jay's lap to get his in-law love. Manny decides to join the pile. Fortunately for all involved, Mitchell gets all of it on video...with the camera he bought at Costco.
By the way, don't EVER ask Manny about his twin sister.
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