User Reviews

When I give this film a 6, it's being a bit generous. Trying to put myself in other people's shoes, I'd say this film probably range anywhere from a 3 to a 5, and then there will be those who hate it. Still, I am likely to lean on the side of one of the few who likes the film. But it's a mixed bag. Sure enough, the special effects, action, and other elements are fantastic. But the film does little to develop it's own character beyond their archetypes and the script seems content to stay average at best.

Jupiter Ascending actually paints a pretty fascinating sci-fi universe. As it turns out, Earth, and thousands of other worlds like it, are owned by a number of different families which act like corporations who seed these worlds. Once the worlds become over populated, their people are harvested to create a youth serum which keeps those living in the corporate society young for millennia after millennia. In this case, the Abraxis family is one of the most powerful and each of three heirs is vying for control of Earth. Standing in their way, however, is Jupiter Jones, who turns out to be the genetic reincarnation of the Abraxis' sibling's mother, and claimant to the throne of the family.

If all of that sounds like a lot to take in, it is, and easily the best part of the film. The Wachowski's have a talent for creating fascinating worlds that feel complete. Here, they have created a massive sci-fi universe the likes of which we haven't seen in at least a decade, maybe longer. It's very clear that their ambition extends beyond just this one story. In fact, there are hundreds of fascinating stories that could be told about this universe. The idea of a corporate controlled universe is timely, and where we've seen this story played out before about the giant corporation versus the little guy, it's never quite been told on this scale.

It's a shame then that this ambition is wasted on a story that doesn't seem to capitalize on such a universe. The story is good, but the script is lacking and the characters never really become all that interesting. They end up feeling like caricatures meant to introduce us to this world we've entered. They're histories are explained and they clearly have fleshed out back stories, but they feel almost lifeless in that they seem to be here only to be an aspect of this world and not a full character. Even as a lead character, Channing Tatum as Caine feels like little more than a body meant to perform choreography and defend Milas Kunis' Jupiter. At the very least, Jupiter is a sympathetic character who shows shades of change, but even she often feels like little more than a narrator meant to ask question for exposition purposes. Eddie Redmayne seems to have the juiciest part, and though he still seems to be a one dimensional villain, he shows emotional depth that the other characters lack.

Most people I suspect will have trouble forgiving the lack of a truly meaningful script and characters that are too one dimensional. But the good news is that the film isn't a complete loss. The action, which the Wachowski's have proved to have a handle on, is fantastic. This is Star Wars level stuff, with space battles and well choreographed martial art duels. The cool tech thrown in, like the gravity boots, add some imaginative spice that once again shows the Wachowski's propensity for finding ways to justify making a 12 year old's imagination a reality. It's some truly fun stuff. Likewise, the world we're introduced to looks fantastic. The special effects make believable some very interesting and exciting details, such as the multitude of gadgets and weapons we're witness to. It's clear that the Wachowski's have set out to create a unique universe, and in my estimation, they have succeeded. I'm a sucker for this kind of world crafting, and so they get higher marks from me.

Of course, I can see why the film was pushed back to the dumping grounds of February. This was meant to be a summer blockbuster, but up against so many big, successful films, it would have a hard time competing. I have the distinct feeling this is going to be a film that gets left behind this year, especially in favor of bigger films being released throughout 2015. Had the film been more focused on it's characters and less on exposition of the universe we're witnessing, then I feel it could have succeeded and become a modern sci-fi classic. But as is, it falls short. Honestly, I do hope for a sequel to this, if only to see this universe continue to get development. Perhaps a sequel would fulfill the ambition the Wachowski's clearly seek to build upon.

Guys, this movie was a joke… It seems like they took all the extra costumes from 'Flash Gordon', 'CG from any Transformer movie, "screenwriting" from 'The Last Starfighter', and character development for 'Gigli' and overall logic from 'The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai across the 8th Dimension' and put them together!

Basic breakdown…

Act I. Kidnap + Rescue + Channing Tatum on magic roller-skates + Redmayne Overacting

Act II. Kidnap + Rescue + Channing Tatum on magic roller-skates + Redmayne Overacting

Act III. Kidnap + Rescue + Mila Kunis on magic roller-skates

This film is bad. You'd think after the total disaster of John Carter (on Mars) someone somewhere would learn that if you take sci-fi and just throw millions and millions and millions of dollars at it is will just be rubbish. And by god is this rubbish. (It's worse than that Jim, It's s, h, i and t).

This film is so bad I just don't know where to start. Hang on - I'm going to have a cup of tea and a think. OK. It has no redeeming qualities at all. The film, not the tea, The story is so badly written that I was just sighing to myself every five minutes.

It basically goes like this: Large bit of exposition explaining what they are going to do next then they go and do what they were saying there were going to do in a huge amount of silly CGI. We have seen so many action scenes that we all know anything can be done, but we need to have a vested interest in at least one of the characters to give a damn whether they live or die, and in this whole movie I couldn't care less if everyone died.

The tone of the film is perplexing. In the first few minutes this bloke is shot dead for no reason. Then the main character is born at sea under a particular constellation pertaining to something to do with astrology, but this is never mentioned again. Then there is a woman in her knickers and bra for some reason. Don't know why. Then Jupiter Jones leaves the earth then she's a queen and we are suddenly in Terry Gilliam's Brazil, complete with Central Services and a cameo from TG himself. (Naughty Terry).

The Wachowski directors have just stolen from FLASH, DUNE, BRAZIL, 2000AD and any other Sci-Fi source they can find. There is even a 2001 space station in one shot. They have proved over the last four films that they have got nothing left to say at all. The film is so Flash Gordon there is even a forced wedding scene with the hero Flash turning up on a space scooter and crashing in at the right moment, oh sorry he's not Flash, he's – I don't know or care, because I've lost the will to live, because there is no suspense and there is no logic to anything. Then not-Flash rescues not-Dale and we have to go through the whole thing again, but this time Ming, sorry, some bloke I never got the name of - who has got a very sore throat and serious Oedipus issues and played by the unfortunate Eddie Redmayne (I bet he wishes he'd got his BAFTA earlier and not had to endure this pile of steaming llamas plop) needs Not-Dale to put her royal seal on a document so he can own Earth, and she has to abdicate, without doing anything of any use whilst being Queen, how about a few edicts? I'd at least ask to see the Royal Mint and get some coins done we me on them. But no. Not-Dale goes off without even a ray gun to see the baddest man in the universe and right at the last minute not-Flash hurtles in and saves the day on another space scooter thing. (His insurance premiums must be astronomical), And of course because he's broken the window at the top of the factory, the whole place is going to go up. I don't know about you, but if I was going to build some sort of factory in the middle of Jupiter where the atmosphere is incredibly fierce, the gravity is gigantic, the electrical storms are the size of EARTH, I would build some sort of fail safe and make certain that if some twit with a space scooter crashed into my big window the whole place wouldn't disintegrate with the speed of the Titanic hitting a massive iceberg. And the baddie dies falling off a tall thing. OMG!! How many bad guys have to die falling off tall things? At least Ming got a big rocket ship through his guts. If I was a bad guy I'd live in a bungalow.

Then some space people who were bad, but then good and then bad who may be friends with Sean Bean do some stuff and are then good people, but then they nip off, but luckily just in time to save Not-Flash and Not-Dale and oh, for Heaven's sake. I don't care I really don't. And then they are back on Earth. Sorry? What? She's the queen of the flipping universe and can do anything and she goes back to cleaning the toilets? Can you IMAGINE how angry her hard working mother would be if she knew her daughter was the heiress to billions and she wasn't doing anything with it? Why the hell do you think she left Russia to go to the USA? In search of a new life! Not to clean toilets! And the Not-Flash bloke has got wings at the end, Oh for sake of Peter Jackson is this Lord of the Rings? He's even got Vulcan Elf ears!! Is there no originality AT ALL in this movie??? Come on!! Couldn't he have had a penis in the middle of his forehead to indicate he was an alien. Oh? He has got one of those? Sorry didn't notice. And they all speak perfect English and apparently the Earth was seeded with genes from, Oh I don't care, I just couldn't care less anymore, this is awful, and I've run out of tea. And there's some big sci-fi Lizards with wings called Mr. flipping Ben or something. SIGH.

There was one nice shot of the planet Jupiter with all the moons around it in 3D that I did quite like, but that was nothing to do with the W Brothers - that's actually there.

I would have thought that after the 15+ years since The Matrix that consumers would be less and less dazzled by visual effects in film, but apparently I was the only one to take the red pill and see beyond the illusion of this movie. Sure you'll get otherworldly visuals and some pretty neat future-tech in Jupiter Ascending but that's where the takeaway stops.

The story is a classic one where a seemingly insignificant individual, in this case Jupiter Jones (Kunis), is suddenly thrust into a much larger and complicated universe than her day-to-day as a maid. As fate would have it, she happens to be the reincarnation of the matriarch of an extremely powerful dynasty that controls a vast industrial empire in the galaxy. The oldest heir to the mother's inheritance is none other than Oscar-nominee Eddie Redmayne, who for whatever reason has difficulty speaking and doesn't want Jupiter to claim what is rightfully hers.

I'll give the Wachowskis that they they've created an incredibly elaborate alternate universe that is equally rich in scope and potential, but they fail to generate the least bit of depth to their characters. Every person you meet is a one-dimensional caricature you'd find in some other sci-fi story.

Honestly the scope is too ambitious to warrant any initial investment in Jupiter or any of the other supporting actors like Channing Tatum and Sean Bean. It's literally just 2 hours of zero-tension action sequences and clichéd dialogue that lead to a resolution that the audience couldn't care less about.

Sure the tech is pretty cool and I was pleasantly surprised by the design of the ships and planetary locales, but the novelty of seeing Channing Tatum ice-skate around the air fighting aliens that pose little threat wears off after the first scene. It's like watching the Jedi take on the droids in the Star Wars Prequels. Why even bother putting them in the way if they don't pose the slightest inconvenience to our protagonists?

I can appreciate science fantasy that dazzles and delights in an original universe, but eventually the tunnel-vision wears off and you realize that there is very little to keep you invested in the story. The planet Jupiter might actually be the most ironic and appropriate metaphor for this movie since - sure it's pretty to look - but then you realize you're just looking a big ball of the two most common gasses in the universe.

Read the expanded version and other reviews on the Drive-In Zeppelin website

The Brothers are no longer, and their films are getting worse by the movie. This drivel is supposed to be about a wretched anglo-Russian girl (Kunis) who miraculously has the same genetic imprint as a millennia-old royal just dead in outer space. The royal was part of a family looking for profit from creating life on suitable planets which are then farmed for their body fluids to produce immortal bath salts for those who can pay. Cra* concept and an even worse script, direction, and character development has resulted! It is all CGI, but for what? The characters are totally uninteresting. Even the evil offspring of the dead royal, who just ooze 'orribleness and are of course played by British actors (including star of the moment Eddie Redmayne!), are one-dimensional. The hero, half wolf, half man, Channing Tatum, remains stony faced and just jets about on a set of gravity boots better than Superman! The only interest is Sean Bean and whether he will last beyond the second reel. From the trailer he looked certain for an early demise but he keeps hanging on! The script is just a series of bang crashes, and scenes of jeopardy for our two leads and how are they going to get out of them - yawn, yawn! The CGI is boring inside two minutes. And the whole film is a derivative sham. You will recognise 'Star Wars' 'North by North West' 'Jurassic Park 2' 'Superman' 'Flash Gordon' and particularly 'Dune' as well as many others. Oh, it is truly awful!!!!!!!!!!

Brother and sister - give up film making now and save the industry from another mega ($170M) flop!

Jupiter Ascending sucks.

The movie has a plot that is way too complicated. Just when you think the movie would end, it drones on and on about another "twist."

In addition, there are too much disasters. Is this a fricking disaster film or what? Jupiter makes too many stupid choices, which is averted by a "rescue" by the male lead. This makes the film too predictable. I will give you two example, one is that she agrees to a sham wedding to save the earth. Another is when she agrees to give up her property to save her family. Can you figure out how she gets out of these? If you said she was saved by the male lead, you guessed it right.

Is there such thing as too much action? Apparently so. With fight scenes that last over 2 minutes and are too "action intense", we don't know who is fighting whom. This quickly make the action boring.

There is a psychological phenomena: people will more often than not change their opinions to agree with the majority.

In my case, I pushed this movie way down into my viewing queue because of all the awful reviews I read and the really poor scores. And then I watched it and I wasn't as disappointed as I expected to be.

The acting was not exactly brilliant: the actors didn't always make me feel the intensity of the action or the drama, but I have seen a lot of movies and this is not a 5/10. I hope I'm not breaking any guidelines by saying that I enjoyed this movie more than I ever enjoyed any of the Twilight movies, and they have the same damn score. The story is really interesting and the effects are decent (I really couldn't find anything wrong with them, as some reviews state, but I suppose it's more of a thing of taste). This movie has enough potential for a sequel if they fix the acting and stop focusing so much on the love story.

And here is the spoiler part: finally a movie where Sean Bean doesn't die.