Sun, May 26, 2013
Jib Janeen, a Jupitarian Spy, enters the Marshal Station, saying to no one in particular that it sure is great being Sparks Nevada. Jib asks The Marshal Station AI to reveal all of Sparks Nevada's secrets, and also passwords. He does not succeed in obtaining either. Croach enters, and reminds Sparks that he was not Sparks' companion, as his onus is was complete when he died. Croach explains how, since imbuing the Barkeep with The Force Galactic, V'stalu of the Galaxium has been consumed by Croach's Nah Nohtek. Now Croach is under onus to Sparks again for his role in defeating the universe-ending conflict. The Barkeep enters, saying there's trouble on Mars in the form of an alien invasion. He noticed a Jupiterian space ship out near Felton's farm earlier that day, and Jupiterians are well known to be spies. The Barkeep suspects the spy is Croach. Croach thinks his antennae will detect the Jupiterian, but even if he can't, they should be able to figure out who the spy is. The Barkeep says that with The Force Galactic, he has omnipotence, but not omniscience, so he doesn't know everything but he can do anything. Felton and The Widow Johnson enter, also to tell "Sparks" that there is a Jupiter Spy about. Felton calls the Jupiterian a "Jupe" despite Jib repeatedly reminding Felton that it's considered a slur. Jib suggests that they should question as many people as possible, and the Widow Johnson leaves to get some pitchforks. When she returns, she accuses Felton of being the spy because he's always walking past her house when he's in town. Felton says he's doing all that because he likes her. Felton accuses the Widow Johnson, for reasons having to do with her mourning of the late Mr. Johnson and taking care of the baby Johnson. Felton then accuses the Baby Johnson, but the Widow Johnson vouches that she actually gave birth to the baby. The Barkeep continues to accuse Croach. No one accuses Jib Janeen of being the spy, at all, ever. Eventually everyone begins rapidly accusing each other of being the spy and the situation tenses. Jib Janeen encourages them to riot enthusiastically, but his speech has the opposite effect and makes everyone present realize how bad their behavior has been. The Barkeep suggests Sparks Nevada comes down to the Saloon and start letting people know about the spy to "incite calmness".
Sun, Jun 9, 2013
Sparks Nevada annoyed that no one, especially Croach, noticed that he'd been replaced with a Jupiter Spy while he was on Earth at a Marshal's conference. "Croach" (actually Jib Janeen) attempts to convince Sparks to let his guard down and give up his password. Felton enters the Marshal Station. He recaps the recent events again and includes that Sparks sent him to go find a scientist to perform DNA tests to find the Jupiter Spy. Doctor Muller enters the Marshal station, announcing that everyone might be doomed, and he's come to scan their DNA. He says when he was scanning the area, he found evidence of the endo-parasitoid extraterrestrial species, the Infectoid Geigermiter. The Infectoid Geigermiter progenerates by seeking out a warm, fleshy mammalian, any mammalian sentient, and gives your face a "bad hug," then unleashes its lavapositor into your throat and lays its larva in your belly. Once the larva is inside, it grows up quick, and multiplies. When your body can't hold it any longer, the larva come tearing out of your body like 1000 razor toothed bees and destroy your body in the wake. They break all your bones and rend all your flesh, as the larva are expunged into oxygen, leaving you little more than a puddle of viscera and tattered skin-stuffs. Then they take over the planet. The Infectoid Geigermiter also wipes the memory of being larvaposited from the carrier. Muller says he still needs to detect the Infectoid Geigermiter and then he can destroy it. Felton moans as if in pain, but says he's just squeamish. Muller also says Croach can't be infected because his nanotech would expel it, but "Croach" wants to be tested to make sure he's not infected anyway. Sparks is suspicious of this and recites several instances Croach's nanotech has saved Croach's life. Sparks also points out that Croach doesn't use figures of speech or contractions as he has been, and also today he has designated nanotech "nanotech" instead of "Nah Nohtek" as well as designated G'loot Praktaw as Mars. Sparks concludes that Croach must be acting weird because he's afraid of the needles in Doctor Muller's DNA testing kit. Janeen, relived that his ruse is working, agrees. Croach, Sparks, Felton, and Muller get their blood tested, and none are impregnated by the alien. The Red Plains Rider enters the Marshal station, not feeling well. Jib Janeen offers to tell Red what's going on, and when he does, Red also notices Croach is using contractions and acting weird. Sparks gets Doctor Muller to admit that he's never seen any of these Infectoid Geigermiters. Sparks realizes Muller is a mad scientist and the creatures probably don't exist. Muller says that his instrument does detect a parasite in a nearby host body. Red finally admits she has something in her: she's pregnant. Red says the baby is Cactoid Jim's. Or possibly Sparks Nevada's.
Mon, Jul 22, 2013
Croach the Tracker, now back in the company of Sparks Nevada, is much more interested in The Red Plains Rider being pregnant than the fact that he was temporarily replaced by the Jupiter Spy. In the last month, Sparks had another scientist to build a DNA tester that works. Croach has Sparks and Red both do their DNA testing, but he set the machine to test to see if Sparks is Red's baby's father. It will take awhile for the test to conclude. A distress beacon is activated, and Sparks says it's Cactoid Jim's beacon. Red says that Jim has been back on Mars after dismantling the Punishment Soccer on Earth's moon, and is now splitting time between Earth and Mars (as well as between herself and Rebecca Rose Rushmore, who he is still legally married to, but separated from.) Red insists they go rescue Jim, and notes that she installed a gyroscopic saddle to protect her baby. Along the way, Sparks, Red and Croach notice that there's a bank robbery in progress, so they divert course. Inside the bank, a father and son outlaw team are performing a stick-up. Sparks, Red, and Croach enter, and the outlaws holding up the bank are surprised Sparks isn't distracted by Jim's distress call. The father says he was monitoring the radio to know when the optimum time to break the law was. He tells his son to activate the gun robots, but both father and son argue over who was supposed to purchase them and set them up. They decide to be arrested peacefully, as their plan has fallen through. Sparks doesn't have time to take them to jail, so he hogties them and puts them in his sidecar. They arrive at Cactoid Jim's location, and Jim doesn't look like he's in any distress. Jim is actually Jib Janeen, the Jupiter Spy. Jib wavers in between saying he was in trouble and was not in trouble. In reality, Jib knocked Cactoid Jim out and put him in a carbonite freeze, then stored him in a nearby cave, unbeknownst to Sparks and the others. Jib then says he activated the beacon so he could get Red to come to him so he can propose. Sparks reminds Red that the baby might instead be his. Red says that she and Jim are not the same as they used to be before they split and wants to know if Jim is sure he wants to be the same person he used to be, or the person he's been recently. Jib says he's more recent Jim, and Red is disappointed. During the distraction, the outlaws got themselves un-hogtied but Sparks notices and re-ties them. The son says he wants to see how the Red / Jim / Sparks situation plays out, and ruins their chances for escape. The father, resigned, says he wishes he could learn for his son so he stopped making mistakes Sparks waxes about this, saying you can no more learn for folk than beat yourself up when they disappoint you. He says folk who already know stuff can just be there for folk who need to learn and hope it rubs off. Red asks how Sparks learned all that, and he says it's partially from his dad trying to make Sparks into himself, a little bit from riding with Croach, a lot from riding with Red, and mostly by being Marshal and hoping for better and not being disappointed when folk disappoint him. Red says the DNA test is done, as she had it set to silent no one heard it finish, and declares that the baby's daddy is Sparks.
Sun, Jul 28, 2013
Sparks Nevada is thrilled with the fact that he's the father of Red's baby, and yet still can't believe it. He has spent the past month babyproofing the planet with Croach's help. Red and Sparks argue over whose name the child will have, and Red admits "The Red Plains Rider" isn't her real name. Croach knows Red's Martian designation - G'rop N'go-goth which means "She Who Came To Us From the Earthens, But Who Is Accepted as Our Own and Who Shall Be Betrothed to Our Youngling, Croach the Tracker". Red confirms this is the truth. Sparks hopes the baby will take his last name due to Red doing the same, and he proposes to her. Red says that she plans on raising the baby on the plains as she raised herself, and doesn't plan on marrying Sparks. Sparks reminds Red how he cleaned up the planet, handed the task of finding the Jupiter Spy to the USSA, and covered up all the exposed outlets on Mars so Red doesn't have to ride the plains anymore. He says he and Croach will keep the peace in town and everything will be perfectly safe, and then proposes again. Felton enters, with the Barkeep. Sparks asks if the Barkeep still has The Force Galactic inside him, and the Barkeep confirms he does. The Barkeep says that his wife won't let him use it, that not that he needs to since everything is so safe. Sparks tells Barkeep to expel the force into a bucket with a wormhole at the bottom of it so it will be in another sector of the universe than Baby Nevada. The Barkeep periodically cosmically regurgitates into the wormhole bucket. Alloy Roy enters the Marshal Station, having just sprayed graffiti all over the Space Saloon and destroyed Felton's rocket steed, then calls Sparks Nevada out. He was profiled as one of 10 "Outlaws to Watch" in the Mars-Earth Coalition's trade magazine. Roy is part of a robot poker game filled with Robot Outlaws. One night, Techs joined the game. Techs said that if someone wanted to form a robot outlaw gang, they should come to Mars to do evil, since Techs had turned the planet into a robot outlaw haven. Since now Mars is so cleaned up, Roy is resentful since he can't find any robots to form a posse with. Red reminds Alloy Roy that Sparks is the Marshal on Mars, and gives an inspiring speech about the position doesn't make you a hero, but the fellow that the badge hangs on is what's important. She says that Sparks has taken out several robot outlaws bigger, tougher and faster than Roy, who wasn't on the most wanted list or the extended list that Sparks already cleaned off. Alloy Roy tries to leave, but Sparks shoots then arrests him. After her speech, Red realizes that she needs to be honest with Sparks, and admit that she's still not actually sure that the baby is his, she just wanted the father to be Sparks, so she didn't actually check the paternity results. Sparks might still be the father, but he still might not be. Red goes into labor.
Sun, Aug 25, 2013
The Red Plains Rider, having just gone into labor, has just taken a DNA test to prove once and for all who the father of her baby is. Sparks asks Croach what he is supposed to be doing besides being here, but Croach reminds Sparks that the planet is cleaned up, so he has nothing better to do but go to the saloon and drink, and then he could die again. Alloy Roy is also still in the Marshal Station jail, and wants to see how things play out, as does the Marshal Station AI. Sparks asks the Marshal Station Doors to call a doctor, but she says that there's a stampede and the doctor is delayed. There are no doctors or scientists (who aren't mad scientists) nearby, so no one is around to assist with the birth. The infirmary has also been destroyed by the stampede. The DNA test finishes and proves that Sparks Nevada is the father of Red's baby. The Doors informs Sparks that there is a USSA star craft in Mars' orbit, and there are infirmaries on USSA ships. Captain Sandy Manlius beams down with news on the Jupiter Spy. When he sees Red is in labor, he has the XO, who used to be the ship's doctor, beam down. Glenn, the XO, is Sandy Manlius' husband and enjoys corny jokes, which irritates Red. Croach relocates all the weapons in the station to the safe so Red doesn't shoot Glenn, or anyone else. Red then delivers the baby, with the help of the future's painless and instant child-birthing technology. The baby is a female, and she is ginger. Sparks wants to hold her, but Red holds her first. Sandy redirects Sparks' attention to the reason he's at Mars in the first place: to talk about Jib Janeen, the Jupiter Spy. He says that the USSA went to a star war over the matter, which is ongoing. He says that the Jupiter Spy is back on Mars even now. Former XO Antoinette Fontaine's husband was killed by a Jupiterian, possibly Jib Janeen. She was removed from her station after her husband's death and went a little mad with grief. Fontaine says the Jupiter Spy is on Mars, and Manlius has her beamed down. When Antoinette arrives, she is actually Jib Janeen. After spotting Red's baby, Janeen announces that he is not Antoinette Fontaine but actually the Jupiter Spy and the baby is his. He explains that Jupiterians don't just shape-shift, they become the person they're impersonating on a molecular level. He shape-shifts into Sparks Nevada, Cactoid Jim, and Croach to prove the point before showing his true form, which is very purple. Janeen says that Antoinette is in a carbon freeze on planet XK9B. He says Cactoid Jim is also carbon freeze, and Janeen sold him to some aliens who were mad at Jim for something and are using him as a coffee table. He then says he's going to take his baby and leave. Red insists the baby is hers, but Janeen explains she's just the carrier, he impregnated her while disguised as Sparks Nevada, and thus appeared to have Sparks' DNA. The baby shape-shifts into its true form, proving it is a Jupitarian. Red doesn't care and insists on keeping the baby until Janeen explains that the baby releases a toxin that causes people to love her. Red would need to be able to excrete an organic saline nutrient bath to nurture the child. Red realizes she can't properly care for the baby and gives her to Janeen so the baby doesn't starve to death, and threatens to kill Janeen once the child is older. Janeen leaves, and Red vows again to kill him after she finds and rescues Cactoid Jim, then leaves with the USSA men. Sparks laments that he never got to hold the baby. Croach, in an attempt to cheer Sparks up, announces big news of his own: he has been fertilized, and the fertilizer is Sparks Nevada.
Sun, Sep 22, 2013
Alloy Roy, still in the Marshal Station jail, asks Croach why he's decorating the Marshal Station for a party. Croach responds he's committing a Surprise Event on Sparks Nevada to cheer him up as he's been depressed since the birth and subsequent loss of The Red Plains Rider's baby, as the baby was actually a Jupiter Spy. Also Sparks is not happy that he's the father of Croach's fertilized ovum after Sparks had touched Croach's eggsacs in The Agony of the Feet. Croach tells Roy that he and Sparks are both considered the father, as he is not a female. Roy is happy to see the surprise event ruined, as he's still sore about Sparks Nevada shooting his hand off, even though Sparks replaced it with another hand. The Marshal Station Doors open and Sparks Nevada enters, slowly walking with his head down, dragging his robot fists along the ground and mumbling to himself, then walks away. Felton enters, calling for halp from Croach and saying he's here for the party. The Barkeep enters as well and they finish decorating the station. Croach, Felton and the Barkeep attempt to start the Surprise Event, but Sparks doesn't want to participate. Croach attempts to encourage Sparks to be excited about the party and the incoming baby, but Sparks refuses. The AI says there's a spaceship full of robot outlaws incoming, so Sparks tells Croach to go take care of it, tells everyone else to leave, and to never talk about the party or Croach being fertilized. The robot outlaws, now outside the station, refuse to leave. Sparks continues his rudeness to Croach while he puts the shields around the station up. The robots state they are the Alloy Roy gang, Roy's poker buddies. Croach is touched by the affection the robots have for Alloy Roy and attempts to get Sparks to agree that it's inspirational. Just as Sparks begins to act like the Marshal, Croach reminds him about the Surprise Event and subsequent baby and Sparks shuts down again, disappointing Croach as well. Felton gives himself an inspirational speech, trying to work up the nerve to shoot the robot outlaws using the Marshal station defenses. Sparks returns and pushes him aside, addressing the robots outside. Sparks says he's releasing Alloy Roy, as he doesn't feel like tousling today. When he does feel like tousling, they will be on the top of his list. He specifically makes Croach let Roy go, since "this glum I got is all his fault." Croach says that releasing Alloy Roy is the final act he will enact for Sparks, though his onus is not complete, as he does not wish to raise their offspring with Sparks in his current state. He tells Sparks to track him down when Sparks returns to himself, and leaves. Alloy Roy takes Sparks' laser pistols, too, as to rub Sparks' face in how much he's lost lately. The Barkeep and Felton encourage Sparks to not let Roy leave, to fight back, but Sparks does not.
Sat, Sep 28, 2013
Alloy Roy gathers his robot outlaw gang together and is inspired by their inspiration to rescue him. The rogues say they are just as much a poker playing gang as an outlaw gang. Steel Magnolia wins Buck 209's hat in the poker game. Alloy Roy says that there are more stories worth knowing on Mars than Sparks Nevada's. Their story, which will go against the do-gooder external conflict type stories, and will be one of how much good are the bad guys, really? Roy mentions that there's a space train coming with a load of Unobtainergon cubes. Roy plans on stealing the cubes and they'll be set for life. Since Sparks Nevada is very glum and in no condition to do a space train escort, and Croach left Sparks' company, they should have no trouble from the law. He uploads a video showing how upset Sparks Nevada is to a shared folder the gang can see. Robots from outside the gang start accessing the folder, as well, including Low Down Ralph, who is the orneriest robot any of them have heard of, and his gang. Buck 209 admits it might have been him that let other robots see the folder, just as his entire address book gets access and the folder is posted to a list-serv. The gang heads towards the space train quickly before other robot outlaws get the idea to rob it as well. Along the way, a fracas ensues - all the gangs in the area fly in and fight each other for the train until they wipe each other out. Roy leads his gang behind a mesa and pulls his (or in this case, Sparks Nevada's) guns on Buck 209 for sharing the folder with Low-Down Ralph and his entire address book. He then draws on C.H.A.R.L.I.E. for undermining him. However, he decides not to shoot either of them at the time. Low Down Ralph and his gang, who are not brothers, find them. Ralph and his gang threaten to shoot Roy's gang, but they all just shoot at C.H.A.R.L.I.E. and run out of ammo killing him. Roy's gang spreads out their fire and kills Ralph's entire gang. Buck 209 then points his guns at Roy and declares his love for Steel Magnolia. He says if he doesn't kill Alloy Roy now, Steel Magnolia will fall in love with Roy before him. Magnolia draws and shoots on Buck 209 for threatening Roy, and the two decide to start a relationship. Steel Magnolia and Roy head towards the train and manage to get aboard and get to the box with the unobtainergon cubes. They open the box but inside is Croach the Tracker, in a Surprise Event, with his weapon drawn. He says that Sparks Nevada tracked him. He returned to Sparks Nevada, for Sparks returned to himself. Sparks enters, and Roy attempts to suss out Sparks' extremely tenuous plan, but Sparks doesn't answer and instead reveals that the hand he put on Roy between Wanted Men and Into Darkness works for him, and Roy is forced to give Sparks his guns back. Sparks re-arrests Roy, and Steel Magnolia as well.
Sun, Nov 3, 2013
Sparks Nevada, now "returned" to himself and reunited with Croach after Croach left at the end of Station Break, copes with Croach's fertilization by declaring "What are you gonna do?", throwing himself into his Marshal work and obsessively cleaning the Marshal station. Croach assures Sparks he's still under onus to Sparks, and Sparks is still under onus to him for the fertilization, as well. Sparks continues doing his best to try to cope while not angering Croach again. The distress signal goes off from Felton's ranch, so Sparks and Croach head to Feltons. Outside Felton's house, they encounter Doctor Mueller, who Croach is unfamiliar with as he wasn't there when Sparks encountered him before (Jib Janeen was pretending to be Croach at the time). Muller says he did not activate the distress signal, and insists that the endo-parasitoid extraterrestrial species, the Infectoid Geigermiter, is not a fiction. Croach says the signal is coming from inside the house, but before they go in, Muller reminds them of how horrible the Infectoid Geigermiter is. They enter Felton's kitchen to find Felton hiding behind his new kitchen island shushing them. Felton mentions that The Widow Johnson is in the other room, and eventually reveals that he is pregnant. Sparks suspects Muller might be right, perhaps the Infectoid Geigermiter is real and got to Felton, since Muller is outside and Felton is pregnant. "The Widow Johnson" enters, who is actually Jib Janeen the Jupiter Spy. Janeen eventually reveals himself. He says Felton's baby is his, and that the time he kissed Felton when disguised as the Widow Johnson, he impregnated Felton via kissing. The rest is just showmanship. Felton goes into labor, and Sparks notices Croach is turning slightly green, which means Croach, too, is going into labor. Jib Janeen then reveals that he also impregnated Croach while he was pretending to be Sparks Nevada. Sparks is elated to hear he's not the father of Croach's baby. Janeen then tells Sparks that he tried to impregnate him as well, but Sparks can't get Jupiterian-pregnant. Both Felton and Croach birth their Jupiterian babies, but before Jib Janeen can leave with them, an Infectoid Geigermiter enters with Doctor Muller. With some prodding, Muller confesses that he created the Geigermiter and incubated it in one of Felton's hypercattle. Jib Janeen says he can rig something together to save them with all their weapons and Sparks' robot fists. They give Janeen their weapons, however, he makes a teleporter that only teleports himself and the babies back to Jupiter. Sparks rigs all of their communicators together to make a strong communicator to hopefully call The Red Plains Rider or Cactoid Jim to come save them. At the last second, Pemily Stallwark teleports in, saves them from the Infectoid Geigermiter, and declares herself to be the Marshal on Mars.
Sun, Nov 24, 2013
Croach and Pemily are bickering and Sparks is in the middle. Sparks reminds Pemily that he checked with the USSA Academy headmaster, and she's there as a deputy, not as marshal as she'd previously claimed. Pemily had been sent to Mars by Gene Peeples in hopes the wilder atmosphere would suit her better. Pemily hopes that Sparks will soon promote her to the rank of "best friend". Pemily had set up an appointment for Sparks, so the three head out to the plains of Mars. They come to a revival tent and head in. Techs is inside, preaching. Pemily had found him and set up this meeting so Sparks would have the chance to beat him in a showdown finally. Techs, having found religion, says that he had only tried to kill Sparks originally as a glitch in his programming. He was caught and jailed by Cactoid Jim after he left Mars but before Sparks got his badge back. In the jail library, he found a Martian religion that fixed his glitch. Sparks is itching to kill Techs, but hearing that Techs' glitch is fixed causes Sparks to reconsider. Pemily urges him to kill Techs anyway. Pemily kills Techs' congregation for objecting to her raising pistols at them and Techs. Sparks still isn't convinced Techs means well, and really wants to show down with him, so he has Pemily give Techs her gun. Techs attempts to decline, but is forced to take it under threat of getting shot. Techs tells Sparks he might as well just shoot him, but Sparks decides not to. Pemily draws on Sparks for refusing to shoot Techs when she's sure he hasn't changed and can't change. Techs draws on Pemily. Sparks then draws on Techs. Croach draws his quantum bow and techno arrows, but isn't sure where to point them. Pemily wonders if she won the Punishment Soccer because she's been a killer all along, and being a killer doesn't go back inside someone once it's out. She believes people (and robots) really can't change. Techs tells her how he really has changed. Sparks then tells Pemily how he has changed as well, ever since Rebecca Rose Rushmore's book about him came out and he's trying to be more emotionally available. He says if Pemily puts her gun down, its a step in the right direction to show that she, too, can change. After some consideration, she puts her weapon down. Techs praises Nah Nohtek for Pemily's soul being saved, and both Croach and Sparks object.
Sun, Jan 12, 2014
After being dropped off on the plains of Mars by Sandy Manlius and his husband Glenn on their USSA star craft at the end of Into Darkness, The Red Plains Rider traveled to planet XK9B. There she found out that the aliens who originally bought Cactoid Jim, who had been frozen in Carbonite by Jib Janeen and sold to be used as a coffee table, had re-sold him in a yard sale to a buyer for Chesh Glutterfane from X27991. The story opens with Red speaking to the Spider Queen, who vaguely threatens Red that she'll regret visiting the planet and directs her to the castle which Chesh Glutterfane has taken up residence, her former castle before the rebellion of the Fly people. Upon arriving at the palace, The Red Plains Rider encounters Glenn, and they recognize each other. Glenn explains that his husband Sandy in was also frozen in carbonite and sold, as well. (He does not explicitly state it was Jib Janeen who did this, though it's likely.) Glenn mounted a rescue crew to retrieve Sandy, but was unsuccessful, and instead was enslaved and forced to wear a metal bikini. Chesh is a crime lord who took over the planet after the fly people rebelled against the spider people. Glenn explains that buying people frozen in Carbonite and forcing their loved ones to fight monsters in order to win them back is Chesh's favorite pastime. The outlaws he invites to the palace for parties bet on the results. The combatants usually die, but if they lose and don't die, they become Chesh's slaves, as Glenn did. Slaves have a control box grafted onto their necks in case they disobey. Glenn attempts to talk Red out of agreeing to the combat, but Red insists, so Glenn collects her weapon and takes her to Chesh. Glenn tells Red he likes confidence and Red reminds him that she's... from Mars. Red stops the party Chesh is throwing and threatens him, should he not give Jim to her freely. After offering Red a water or coffee, Chesh declares that Red will battle against a monster who has never been defeated. He offers her one of several ineffective weapons, and Red chooses a child's gun which shoots small projectiles. The monster Red has to fight has plated skin, which will not be hurt by the small gun. Upon being dropped into the battle pit, Red instead shoots Glenn's control box, freeing him from Chesh's control. Glenn, who still has Red's gun, aims it at Chesh. The monster requests to have his control box shot off, and Red obliges. He eats Chesh's annoying monkey to keep him from calling the guards. Red and Glenn shoot the control boxes off several other slaves, then collect Sandy, Cactoid Jim, and the other slaves' loved ones. They bring Chesh along to stand trial for his crimes by the USSA as they all escape on Chesh's really cool sail barge.
Sat, Dec 7, 2013
Jib Janeen, the Jupiter Spy, sings Christmas on Jupiter as he prepares for his annual Christmas party, talking to himself about his guests, and how he'll trick them into thinking he didn't make eggnog, when he actually did. The doorbell rings, then Sparks Nevada and Croach the Tracker enter, and Jib notes that they weren't invited. JIb had, however, invited The Red Plains Rider, as is Jupiterian tradition to invite the first person they impregnate on each planet. Sparks notes that Red is still really mad at him and would probably have killed him if she had come, while he and Croach are there to arrest him, instead. Jib objects, saying you can't arrest people on Christmas. When Sparks and Croach disagree, he asks to do one Christmas on Jupiter tradition -- to tell a story. Sparks reluctantly agrees and allows Jib to dim the lights for atmosphere. Sparks tells Croach to cuff Jib, and as Croach suggests that JIb could shape-shift out of them, Jib promises he will not.