Kung Fu Panda 3 (2016)
Jack Black: Po
Photos
Quotes
-
Po : Who are you?
Li : I'm Li Shang. I'm looking for my son.
[everybody gasps]
Po : You lost your son?
Li : Yes. Many years ago.
Po : I lost my father.
Li : I'm very sorry.
Po : Thank you.
[pause]
Li : Well, good luck to you.
Po : You too. I hope you find your son.
Li : And I hope you find your father.
[they both walk off, everyone facepalms]
-
[from clip]
Kai : You must be the Dragon Warrior.
Po : And you must be Kai. Beast of vengeance, Maker of widows.
Kai : YES! Finally thank you. Almost makes me want to spare your life.
Po : Oh you want to spare me huh? How about you spare me the chit-chat alright let's do this.
Kai : I'm going to take your chi then the chi of every panda in the...
Po : Augh! chit-chat
Kai : In the...
Po : Chitty-chitty-chat-chat, chat-chat-chat!
Kai : In the...
Po : Chit-Chat!
-
Po : Never under-estimate the impact of dramatic entrance!
[Po made a dramatic move to kick open the door, door suddenly opens, oops it's Shifu!]
-
Po : [Shifu has made a flower bloom with the power of chi] Woah! What was that?
Shifu : That was chi.
Po : Wow! What's chi?
Shifu : The energy that flows through *all* living things.
Po : So you're saying if I-so you're saying if I teach, I'll be able to do cool stuff like that?
Shifu : No, I'm saying if you teach, *I'll* be able to do cool stuff like that.
Po : Oh.
Shifu : Mastering chi requires mastery of self. Oogway sat alone in a cave for *thirty* years, asking one question: who am I? Who am I? I'm lucky if I get five minutes before you interrupt...
Po : Aw, so now I have to sit alone in a cave for thirty years?
Shifu : Eventually. After you master teaching.
Po : Teaching? There's no way I'm ever gonna be like you!
Shifu : I'm not trying to turn you into me; I'm trying to turn you into you.
-
Po : [Mr. Ping has stowed away in Po's travel bag] Dad?
Li : [thinks Po is talking to him] Yes?
Po : [sternly] Dad...
[opens the bag to find Mr. Ping inside]
Mr. Ping : Yes?
Po : What are you doing here?
Mr. Ping : What am I doing? Getting a backache! Did you have to step on every rock?
Po : No, I mean why are you here ?
Mr. Ping : What was I supposed to do, huh? What if the pandas don't have food you like? You're never gonna be able to save the world on an empty stomach. I consider my presence mission critical.
Li : Oh yes, about that. We can't share the location of the village with others. So...
Mr. Ping : Oh, you think I can't keep a secret, huh? I raised Po for twenty years before I finally told him he was adopted.
Li : Seriously?
Po : Yeah.
Li : OK, I guess it would be cruel to make you fly back.
Po : [amazed] You can fly?
Mr. Ping : I'm a bird, Po.
-
[sees Master Flying Rhino's armor]
Po : I think I just peed a little!
-
Li : You have to come home with me.
Po : What? To the secret village?
Li : Yes, son. You must rediscover what it is to be a panda. You have to learn how to live like a panda. Sleep like a panda. Eat like a panda. Those 103 dumplings? I was just warming up.
Po : I always knew I wasn't eating up to my full potential!
-
Po : [dueling Kai in the Spirit Realm] You want my chi so bad? Then take it.
[Po redirects his chi to Kai]
Kai : Yes, the power is *mine*!
[as the chi fills his body, he begins to glow and his jade amulets float away]
Kai : Wait, no. It's too much. That's too much. No!
[Kai vanishes in a burst of light]
Kai : NO!
-
Po : [Po is about to perform the Wuxi Finger hold on Kai] Sorry, buddy. Gotta send you back to the Spirit Realm. Skadoosh.
[flexes his pinky]
Po : OK, that didn't work. Let me try one more time. Skadoosh.
[flexes his pinky again, then over and over]
Po : Skadoosh, skadoosh, skadoosh. What the ?
Kai : Hold on, wait! It's working. No! No!
[pretends to gag, then chortles]
Kai : No, it's not. Did Oogway teach you that little trick? Too bad it only works on mortals. And *I* am a Spirit Warrior.
-
Tigress : This isn't going to work.
Po : It has to.
Tigress : You're not thinking straight.
Po : I am.
Tigress : [kicks his feet] You're not.
Po : I am.
Tigress : No.
Po : Yes, I am.
Tigress : No, I've seen Kai. I see what he can do.
Po : But he hasn't seen what I can do.
[does the Wuxi Finger Hold, just like in the first film]
Tigress : [confused] The Wuxi Finger Hold?
Po : It's my best move. I just have to get to Kai, grab his finger, and then, skadoosh, back to the spirit realm.
Tigress : [squeezes his hand] He has an army of jade warriors. Everything they see, he sees. So, there's no sneaking up on him.
[pushes him down]
Tigress : You'll never get close enough.
Po : It's gonna work.
[gets up]
Tigress : [puts him down and puts her feet on him] He can only be stopped by a master of chi.
-
Lei Lei : [Lei Lei discovers Po's action figure of Tigress] Oh stripy baby, so beautiful!
Po : Oh! Okay, careful with that, that's my action figure!
Lei Lei : Can I keep her? Can I?
Po : No...
[Lei Lei starts to get sad as if she's ready to cry; Po has a change of heart and decides to let Lei Lei have his Tigress action figure]
Po : ...problem, of course! Yeah, that's why I brought her; take good care of her.
Lei Lei : Yes, stripy baby!
[Lei Lei giggles as she plays with the Tigress action figure]
-
Po : I don't know what she told you, but I am done.
Shifu : teaching or been humiliating?
Po : both, I don't know why you ever thought I could teach that class.
Shifu : I knew you couldn't
Po : what? You set me up to fail? why?
Shifu : if you only do what you can do you will never be more than you are now.
Po : I don't want to be more; I like who I am.
Shifu : you don't even know who you are
Po : what? Of course, I do, I am the dragon worrier
Shifu : And what exactly does that means?... dragon worrier
-
Po : Guys guys, you're never gonna guess who just showed up. Not in a million years. You can't... you just try...
[Li lifts his helmet slightly]
Tigress , Monkey , Crane , Viper , Mantis , Shifu : [in unison] Your father!
Po : Whoa, how did you just guess that? Oh, wait a second. Yeah, of course. We look exactly the same. Dad, say hi to my friends. Mantis, Tigress, Monkey, Crane and Viper.
Li : [shook Monkey's hand] Oh, Viper, was it?
Monkey : Monkey, sir.
Po : They're kinda my best friends. And this... this is Master Shifu. Legend!
Shifu : It is an honor to meet you, Master Panda.
[to Po]
Shifu : Perhaps your father would care to join us in the training hall?
[to Li]
Shifu : Your son will be teaching the class.
[Monkey, Viper, Mantis, and Crane cringe]
Li : Oh ho!
Po : I'm sure he's tired. I'm sure you're tired. He's tired. I'm gonna show him to the Chrysanthemum Suite.
Li : What, tired? No, I'm fine. I would love to watch you teach.
Po : Trust me. It would be more fun to watch me...
[the bell tower suddenly rings]
Po : Fight!
-
Mei Mei : I am Mei Mei.
[From behind her fan]
Mei Mei : Wow, she's amazing! She's so beautiful!
[Pulling fan away]
Mei Mei : That's sweet, Po. But please try to save all other compliments until after the performance.
Po : Me? No, I didn't say...
Mei Mei : [shushes] Shut it.
[whips ribbon]
Mei Mei : After the performance.
Mr. Ping : Has it started yet?
-
Po : [Po returns to the mortal world] Dad. Dad. Dads!
[both run to Po and hug him]
Mr. Ping : Don't you go disappearing in petals ever again.
Li : We thought we lost you.
Po : No, you saved me. you all did.
[Po looks at everybody and Big Fun laughs]
Po : Now, come on over here!
[Everyone runs to Po]
Big Fun : Hugs!
[Tigress, Monkey, Crane, Viper, Mantis and the pandas hugs Po]
-
Bao : What kind of panda doesn't know how to roll?
Po : Well, I'm kinda new at this whole being a panda thing.
Bao : [looks at Mr. Ping] And what kind of panda are you? You have a funny neck.
Mr. Ping : I'm not a panda at all.
Bao : What's that?
Mr. Ping : My hat.
Bao : What's that?
Mr. Ping : My beak.
Bao : What's that?
Mr. Ping : My wing.
Bao : What's that?
Mr. Ping : My dumplings. No more questions. Go away, kid.
-
Shifu : Today, will be my final class.
[Po and the Five become worried]
Po : Your final?... Wait, I didn't know you were sick.
[looks at Shifu's eyes]
Po : Although, you have been looking a little...
Shifu : [pushes Po away with his staff] I'm not sick!
Po : Healthy. A little healthy. A lot actually.
Shifu : My final class because from now on, your training will be in the hands of the Dragon Warrior.
[points his staff toward Po]
Po : [nods and smiles for once, then his face turns frightful in realization] *WHAT*?
[knocks Shifu back with his voice and steps close to Shifu]
Po : Me? Teach? I mean, why not Tigress? She's always telling everyone what to do.
Tigress : Be quiet, Po.
Po : See what I mean?
Shifu : Tigress is not the Dragon Warrior. You are.
Po : Come on, they're the Five! What can I teach them?
Shifu : [reappears behind Po] There is always something more to learn, even for a master. For instance, let me show you another move...
[twirls his staff]
Shifu : The dramatic exit.
[points his staff at the roof]
Shifu : What's that?
[quickly leaves the room and closes the door]
Po : Whoa! Are you kidding me? That... What? Where'd he go?
Tigress , Monkey , Mantis , Viper , Crane : [bowing down in unison] Master.
Po : [chuckles] He's gone guys. It's cool.
Monkey : We await your instruction, Master.
Tigress : All you have to lose... is our respect.
Mantis : [walks up to Po's shoulder] Seriously, how bad could it be?
[the scene cuts to chaos in the Training Hall]
Mantis : Very bad! Very, very bad!
-
Viper : We need a chi master.
Shifu : He will continue stealing the chi of masters until he has consumed it all.
[Po looks at the early parts of the scroll, taking notice of the ancient pandas that could teach chi]
Viper : We have to make a way to stop him.
Crane : Or he'll get more and more powerful with every master he defeats!
Tigress : We have no choice. We fight.
Li : I can teach you, son.
[Mr. Ping gasps]
Po : You can do this?
Li : Well, of course. I'm a panda.
Po : That must be why the universe sent you here!
-
Mr. Ping : You can't take Po away from me. No, no, I want a second opinion. Shifu, open another scroll or something.
Shifu : I think he should go.
Mr. Ping : Fine, a third opinion. Monkey? Viper? Tigress?
Po : Dad, you heard what Shifu said Oogway said. This guy can only be stopped by a master of chi, and I can only master chi by knowing who I really am. Well... I'm a panda.
Mr. Ping : [sadly] I'll pack your lunch for the road.
-
Mr. Ping : Here, son, I packed your chopsticks.
[the villagers gasp in surprise at the chopsticks]
Po : Thanks, Dad.
[notices villagers]
Po : What?
Bao : What are those for?
Po : These? These are chopsticks. They're for picking up dumplings.
Bao : You mean you only eat one at a time?
Po : [gasps in realization] I knew I wasn't eating up to my potential!
-
Li : Everyone, everyone gather around! This is my son.
[Three panda kids climb on Po's shoulders]
Po : Triplets!
Ku Ku : Hi, I'm Ku Ku.
Meng Meng : I'm Meng Meng.
Shuai Shuai : I'm Shuai Shuai.
Meng Meng : Your fur is soft.
Shuai Shuai : He smells like cookies.
Grandma Panda : He's so handsome. Just like his father.
Mr. Ping : Thank you.
-
Li : Son, these are your cousins. Dim and Sum.
Po : I have cousins!
Sum : Welcome!
Dim : Welcome!
[Sum puts a necklace of buns on Po]
Po : Whoa, buns on a string.
Sum : We call it a snacklace.
Dim : That's right.
[Dim, Sum, and other villagers eat off the snacklace]
Sum : Dah... we'll make you another one.
