With his reliability in tatters after the audacious theft of a priceless Van Gogh painting while under his supervision, the down-on-his-luck private security agent, Danny Stratton, has been given a shot at redemption. Now, along with his partners, brawny, Mach Ren, no-nonsense, J.Jae An, and tech-savvy, Ding Dong, the members of the Security Management Action Recovery Team, Danny will have to transport a rare ancient Chinese vase out of Shanghai, all the way to London. However, history repeats itself, and once again, Danny's old nemesis, the villainous art-thief, Long Fei, and his murderous henchmen ambush the team. Can Danny protect those he loves, retrieve the precious artefact, and in the process, restore his damaged reputation?Written by
The first film Orlando Bloom shot in China See more »
Written by Joshua Lloyd-Watson & Thomas McFarland
Performed by Jungle
Courtesy of XL Recordings See more »
Orlando Balloon - Actor
Considered amongst many film critics to be the very best at convincingly portraying a piece of very thin, soaking wet, tissue paper and possessing the emotional range of a balloon with a face drawn on it, Orlando Balloon has proven time and time again that you don't actually need to be able to act in order to be successfully mistaken for an actor.
In this latest offering he succeeds spectacularly in proving so again. The addition this time around of a mop of blonde hair and a selection of small cuts to his face and various 'hero' poses, all fail in adding any real depth to his standard facial expression or to this flop. It's dire.
Fortunately for all concerned, Orlando cannot confirm what his next role might be and it really isn't worth watching this movie to see for yourself why that is.
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