WandaVision (TV Mini Series)

Filmed Before a Live Studio Audience (2021)

Kathryn Hahn: Agnes

Photos 

Quotes 

• Agnes : Hello, dear. I'm Agnes, your neighbor to the right. My right, not yours. Forgive me for not stopping by sooner to welcome you to the block. My mother-in-law was in town, so I wasn't. So, what's your name? Where are you from? And most importantly, how's your bridge game, hon?

• Agnes : So what's a single gal like you doing rattling around this big house?

  Wanda Maximoff : Oh, no, I'm not single.

  Agnes : Oh, I don't see a ring.

  Wanda Maximoff : I assure you, I'm married. To a man. A human one and tall.

• Agnes : What kind of housewife would I be if I didn't have a gourmet meal for four just lying about the place?

• Agnes : The only way Ralph would remember our anniversary is if there was a beer named June 2nd.

• Agnes : You didn't answer the back door.

  [giving a pineapple to Wanda] 

  Agnes : For your upside-down cake.

  [seeing the Harts] 

  Agnes : Oh! Hi, I...

  Arthur Hart : [Wanda closes the door in her face]  Who was that?

  Wanda Maximoff : [simultaneously]  A salesman!

  Vision : Telegram. A man selling telegrams.

  Wanda Maximoff : Wouldn't you know it? Good news is more expensive.

• Agnes : And you don't have a song? Nothing special you played at your wedding?

  Wanda Maximoff : No, nothing special.

  Agnes : I'll just loan you some records, then. So, we've got music covered, decor, wardrobe. Oh! What about seduction techniques?

  Wanda Maximoff : Oh, I have those.

  Agnes : Of course, you do.

  Wanda Maximoff : Just out of curiosity, what does it say?

  Agnes : That you should stumble when you walk into a room so he can catch you. It's romantic.

  Wanda Maximoff : Any other tricks?

  Agnes : You could point out that the death rate of single men is twice that of married men.

  Wanda Maximoff : Now, that's romantic.

• Agnes : Many hands make light work. And many mouths make good gossip.

• Agatha : Hello, dear. I'm Agnes, your neighbour to the right. My right, not yours. Forgive me for not stopping by sooner to welcome you to the block. My mother-in-law was in town, so I wasn't. So, what's your name? Where are you from? And more importantly, how's your bridge game, hon?

  Wanda Maximoff : I'm Wanda

  Agatha : Wanda, charmed.

• Agnes : What Ralph could really use is, "How To Goose Your Wife So You Don't Lose Your Wife."