Reviews

...Hey Surrender Cinema, what happened to the great editor(s) that created what we've come to expect in the incredible 'The House of Exotic Wax' and (the first) 'Femalien'? Ever since the release of these I've lost sleep eagerly awaiting your new flicks anticipating another cutting-edge scene that depicted unquestionable and believable 'soft' action (that's some really great faking or...). Now all you're producing is the typical ho-hum bedroom boredom available in any Shannon Tweed flick.

This serious disappointment had about four scenes where the hottest action was undercovers, always two people constantly pulling the sheets up over each other -- come-on people, it's all-too-obvious that they're ONLY playing "footsies"! Where were you intending for this to get released, in Saudi Arabia? And why did you disguise this celluloidal waste with an Unrated sticker when what you should've slapped on it was "Disney quality PG-13"?

Sorry guys, or maybe you should be sorry, 'cuz I no longer support your efforts to 'pull the covers' over my eyes. Geez, I've seen more skin and action on daytime soaps...

I've seen most of them and, like other guys, F-Fwd to the sex scenes. I don't drool over them, rather I look for some level of realism in the scenes, the "eloquence of their efforts" or reality of their faking. I'm REALLY bored with the ho-hum 'undress and caress' stuff Shannon Tweed is notorious for - all of her films were meant for insomniacs!

I pessimistically look for anything that says 'fake' (except the silicon of course) such as the way over-used 'girl riding the guy's thigh' scene, both standing upright with him behind her, either of them grinning their super-plastic Ken & Barbie doll look with 'ain't I beautiful?' smiles, yada, yada yada, you get the picture.

Even though most of the scenes in this flick failed my aforementioned checks there was one scene that I had to have worn out rescanning - I'm still convinced the scene where she's laying on her back on a wall was severely cut by the editors just to scathe the MPAA X rating! This scene alone warrants a 'very-watchable' status for this one, and I'm gonna rent it again...

...but this isn't one of them, although this wasn't a total waste.

I've seen most of them and, like other guys, F-Fwd to the sex scenes (for those of you looking for celluloid with class, aka plot, you won't find it in any of Surrender's stuff - that'd be akin to me expecting my employer to give raises, hahahaha...). But I don't drool over them (ran out of drool), rather I look for some level of realism in the sex scenes, the "eloquence of their efforts" (reality of their faking). I guess I've grown bored with the ho-hum 'undress and caress w/o impress' scenes. Any Shannon Tweed flick has at least 3 of these scenes - all of her films were meant for insomniacs!

I look for the usual giveaway positions such as the way over-used 'girl riding the guy's thigh' scene, both standing upright with him behind her, either of them grinning as though the camera operator just farted (look like Ken & Barbie dolls with their super-plastic 'ain't I beautiful?' smile), any tell-tale sign of the G-cover (not the G-string, this is a white stickem patch meant for guy's genitals), etc. - you get the picture. After a few of these rentals you'll start thinking of better uses for your money, like firestarters.

Even though this flick was thin based on my earlier mentioned expectations in realism it had a couple of semi-believable moments, thus I dub it a 'watchable' status for the rest of the testosteroned-Thogs out there, but as I said earlier there are better ones!

...if you don't mind the obvious faking, but then maybe I'm expecting too much from this category of flicks - those that ride the line between R and X. An effort to make the faking more debatable to the eagle-eyes would be nice.

There were a few NICE scenes in Exotic House of Wax - perhaps if Surrender Cinema made more like it...

Worth viewing with at least one eye!

If my summary wasn't enough, then you'll most likely ENJOY this celluloidal waste of time...

...its successor (Femalien 2) sucks - waiting for the 3rd!