Reviews

Worst Ozzie film in 20 years...an I live here!

It started slow with correct tension then the line went slack....slack like the kite floating off the end of your string after the knot failed....as the script did and left you reeling in all the string you let out to find no kite, but a mess of tangled line in your hand...I support Australian films as best I can as a West Australian.... Girlfriend call it shower time long before 1/2 way through......I turned it off with 20 mins to go as I just couldn't humor it any longer.....any reviewer or this utter trash that gives it anything but 1 out of 10 is part of the production staff....... It really is that bad....worst Ozzie film in over 20 years!

First off lets start with this is not How Snake Eye's became Snake Eye's!!!

That was covered in a previous G. I. Joe film where Snake Eye's was a child in a monastery training along side with "Storm Shadow" and he was a Caucasian kid, not a Asian kid... Next there is no Arnie, Rambo, Willis, Stratham, The Rock, Dennis Quaid, Channing Tatum or any real stars like the first 3 movies???

In fact G. I. Joe isn't even mentioned until 9 mins before the end.

Where is the Plane?....Gross fraud that this is part of the G. I. Joe franchise...IT AIN'T!

Story was strong, if not original, cast was better than "B" grade.......played out well but seemed as if the cast was told..."Don't rehearse, It will seem more natural if read off an auto autocue machine" So looks like Zero direction, Zero retakes, Zero impute into how the scenes were filmed.... The actors just took the easy money an run.... Tom....your better than this???

I a 54 year old Male took my girlfriend 38 & her two girls 8 & 10 to see this film. Whilst waiting in line other parents said they wanted to see toy story 4 instead but their kids wanted secret life of pets 2 . We were of the same opinion & were only swayed by the wants of the children. The adults were bored into drowsyness in ten minutes, Actually having to rouse ourselves from dropping off over and over. The children also fell asleep! Every scene with Tiffany Haddish's voice was nausiating and made you want to slumber more.... The PG rating?...As in your kids might need something explained or need some reasurrance that all is well was put in place for when the kids ask why it was so boring! The other audiance members voiced similar opinions as to how bad it was when we saw each other later after the movie. A big thumbs down from all of whom we spoke too. The time could have been better spent watching the preview over & over till we fell asleep... Just wait till it's on DVD and the don't rent it.

Biggest pile of crap since the near finished epic "The Return of The Unflushable Turd" Highly miss led by the cover... No motorcycles No desert seens No Pyramids Was so lame it made faith healers run for cover as even they couldn't make this walk straight.. Utter crap & I'm proun for picking bad movies lol What's that thing on the lead actresses chin? Rating this as a 2 star instead of 1 star as the interlectually challanged guy had a single good line which made me laugh

The previous reviewer said that he loved this or "just am crazy"... He was right bout his self appraisal........ I only bothered to write this review as like those God bothers that come knocking on our doors.....I'm trying to save you! This is crap on every level.... Cameo virtually from Danny Treo.... Talk about wooden.....The guy playing the main priest shouldn't be allowed in a Ronald McDonald suit to act let alone be given lines to mono tone out! It never got better........Weak story....poor effects...... It was like I really believed the 10 star review from the previous reviewer and really was waiting for it to change but he plain out lied! Even crap would rate this as Crap! Are you getting the picture? Don't torture yourself with this complete wast of electricity..... Talk about a wast of all their resources & MY TIME! The previous reviewer was either bribed, part of the crew or just plain retarded to believe this was even worth writing about. Ten stars.........You got to be **** kidding! We best never listen to him/her AGAIN!

After reading the other review by "castlefreak82"I thought this would be great.....After reading "It will not only scare you ,but make you cry while laughing all the way through it." I thought I was on a winner.......NOT.......Lies, all lies......not funny (2 to 3 laughs tops)... Zero scares....zero! Did we even watch the same film??? I would list it's content as soft porn..... Was the previous reviewer paid to blow sunshine up this movies butt? Bad script.......fair to bad acting..... too much soft porn to let my 13 year old daughter watch it. Don't waist your time on this crap..... Wasn't worth the minimum 10 lines a review takes.... In life ya can't replace my time or family....this movie stole my time...