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Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies (2012)
Not bad for an Asylum movie
I was pleasantly surprised. The movie looks quite good and some of the actors are pretty decent. Sets and costumes are also okay, except for the zombies.
Really, the zombies look like crap and walk like hip stiff seniors on drugs. I mean, the movie is from 2012. Have you seen The Walking Dead? Zombies like in Abe Lincoln vs. Zombies are unacceptable. Period.
I watched the much enjoyable SchleFaZ version and had a really good time with the movie itself. I mean, the plot is gaga, but at least they made the effort to come up with a plot for a change.
I watched s many horrible Asylum flicks, and this is one of the better mockbusters they threw on our TV screens.
Jack Frost (1997)
The budget was $3.64
A static styrofoam snowman with no facial expressions murders a couple of villagers off-camera. It's pathetic.
The whole movie is so cheaply produced that even the one action scene is completely devoid of action. Awkward car rides with lots of wobbling and a bumbling snow drift replacement aren't even unintentionally funny.
In the entire film, one box of Christmas ornaments gets broken. The rest is ketchup and pudding, and the illusion is complete. There are no CGI effects. For example, Jack Frost's transformation from a plastic monster to a puddle of pee and back is never shown, but is masked with quite clever fades to an astonished face. What a cheek.