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Scream Queens (2015)
What a waste of a great idea... will go down in history as another letdown to horror fans
Ryan Murphy really had a great opportunity to do something great with Jamie Lee Curtis and this idea. Scream Queens is less of an original idea and more a title that people have branded Ms Curtis and other iconic heroine's in the horror genre. Ryan Murphy took this idea and created yet another idiotic, chopped up, flimsy story. He has wasted the talents of his cast by making these women into vapid, one dimensional and stupid girls with no common sense. A scream queen is supposed to be smart, cunning and focused. We were promised a slasher anthology with Jamie Lee Curtis and Emma Roberts standing back to back and leading a group of girls to stop a serial killer. This is not what we get. It's pretty much House on Sorority Row. Scream Queens feels a lot like American Horror Story, another Ryan show, and like AHS: Coven, Scream Queens feels much longer and twice as boring as what is generally agreed to be the worst season of the show, right down to Emma Roberts playing the same character. What you're left with is another toss salad of crap that is another Ryan Murphy joke. Here's what you can expect from Scream Queens:
- Vagina 'jokes' in every scene. Seriously, every variation of a vagina nickname is used in the first three episodes. - Every character tries to outwit each other. It's as repetitive as it is infuriating. Imagine Juno the TV show, and every character is Juno. - Do you enjoy character development? Or common sense? Or continuity? Well, you're out of luck here. Characters motivations are chopped and changed, and the decisions and consequences to their actions are non-existent. - The jokes are so lame. You will definitely feel a sense of trying way too hard... every second line is a lame reference to a horror movie this show is trying to homage but in fact weakening by associating it with this dreck. - Everything is so fast paced whenever anything important happens but when it comes to boring romantic subplots or long, long, unnecessary speeches about a vagina and sex suddenly they have all the time in the world. - The show labels itself a slasher and a dark comedy. It is neither. It is so over the top to the point of stupidity. It is less of a comedy and more of a bumbling attempt at trying to be edgy. It has no idea what sort of comedy it's trying to produce. Jamie Lee Curtis as the Dean of the university will, for example go to sleep listening to a white noise machine playing the sound of a slasher movie. This is just apparently something her character does?
Throw in two lines of script from Ariana Grande and several endless shots of Nick Jonas shirtless and playing the obligatory token gay character, mix in every female character going boy crazy despite the circumstances she finds herself in and endless meandering and you have Screen Queens.
This show is a mess.
Variety recently published a cover story with Jamie Lee Curtis and Emma Roberts in which Jamie Lee stated that this show will probably be the highlight of her career... I wonder if she had actually seen this show. Emma Roberts is a great actress and all her scenes are made up of making over the top racist, homophobic and sex jokes that don't offend me because of they're context, they offend me as a viewer because her character has no reason to do this other than to hopefully elicit a chuckle from the viewer. It doesn't, because it's lame.
No one cares that there is a serial killer on the loose on a college campus. The writers immediately wrote themselves into a corner and don't try and do anything to help this plot make any sense. The viewer is constantly asking "why don't the girls just go elsewhere instead of staying in the house where several people have been murdered?" Each girl is essentially wearing a sign on her back saying KILL ME! This is a pretty huge hole in the story and the writers aren't the least bit smart about it. In a movie you can get away with it, in a TV show that spans several weeks it's just idiotic. I really wanted to like this show. I really wanted to find something good or redeeming to add to this review, but sadly there is nothing good about this.
Avoid this show at all costs and re-watch Scream or Halloween.
20 to 1 (2005)
Awful, Pathetic and Stupid
What can I say about 20 to 1? It is pure stupidity.
Hosted by washed up talk show host Bert Newton, 20 to 1 counts down the top 20 Celebrity Scandals, Movie Lines, Heroes and Villains etc. Sure, it sounds like an interesting show. It's not. Each segment is filled with commentary by washed up Australian Nobody's such as former Big Brother house mates, rejects from Australian Idol, the list goes on and on, these people don't know what they're talking about, nor does anyone care. 20 to 1 is EXTREMELY biased to Australia, for example, in "Greatest Movie Moments" at least 7 of the 20 moments were Australian. Whoever makes these lists obviously has no idea what they are doing, especially in the case of "Greatest songs of the decade" which featured hits from the last two years, which was just crap. Not only do these list's suck, but they are repeated i.e. Movie Heroes and Villains" - 11 September 2007 and Movie Saints and Sinners" - 27 November 2007. And let's not forget the incredibly lame Bert Newton making lame cheap jokes in between each segment, Ugh.
Avoid this show at all costs. It is pure crap.
Pretty Good for a Low-Budget 20 Minute Movie.
Cut is a Short 20 Minute movie about an eager Horror Flick Student Mary Wilson, who finally gets to meet her inspiration Alfred Carpenter (Obvious Reference to Alfred Hitchcock and John Carpenter)When he comes to give a speech to her class.
Her dream comes True when he invites her to come to his mansion to help him film a Short Movie he is working on when she realizes he's not as sane as she thinks he is.
Not particularly scary and not very good acting, But if you've got 20 minutes to kill then its alright.
This movie is Pretty Good for a Low-Budget 20 Minute Movie and can pretty much only be found on the Halloween 4 DVD Special Features.