Reviews

Running on nearly 20 years Bruce Willis's infamous rough and tough N.Y.P.D officer McClane is back and up against a new nemesis. When a Cyber terrorist threatens to fire sale the Country it's up to none other than John and his newest sidekick (Long, he's no Jackson but manages to live up to the title) to save the day. Sadly the damn MPAA has wrongfully put "Die Hard" under PG-13 where as apposed to it's predecessors had the wonderful R rating. You would think this would be outrageous which at times it is, there's no cursing and McClane's quote is nearly spoken in a whisper. But the action remains as sturdy and entertaining as McTernian left off in 88. Although a few sequences are a little too popcorny for me when they should be intense and hardcore. Despite being the 4th film it's good, on par with the original even. "Live Free or Die Hard" is fun, action packed, comical and the plot is a little creepy when you think about it. ***

Upon their car stalling in the middle of the night a bickering married couple (blandish Wilson and an annoying Beckinsale) head to a creepy, deserted motel. There finding the motel has worse things to offer than the run down furnishing. The couple after gathering their wits together and finally putting an end to seemingly useless go nowhere arguments intend to survive the hellacious night before becoming an addition to a collection of smut tapes. "Vacancy" builds up the tension and puts every piece together but to no surprise fails to deliver correctly, sometimes at all. Much like most of the thrillers nowadays it takes two of Hollywoods best stars, throws in useless dialogue and makes them run around for about an hour. A tired and at times ridiculous new age thriller. **1/2

*** A sub plotted film which builds up around a grieving widower (Sandler) who lost his family on 9/11. But things begin to change when an old college roommate (Cheadle, on a continuous performance streak) comes back into his life after their paths meet on the seemingly uncrowded N.Y streets. As the two bounce off each other learning thing for thing their lives take a great turn when Charlie's life becomes obstructed with grief and a still painful remembrance of his life than once was. Sandler gives his second career high performance as a grieving widower, sadly at times his acting is shaky and makes him look like he just got back from a Nicholson lobotomy special. "Reign over Me" is a strong, defiant film...in small doses - writer/director Mike Binder adds a few subplots that serve no real relevance towards the end, otherwise the film shows character and true heart. There are some tear jerking scenes, probably the best being the court room scene where Sandler jams to some "Who". Love REIGNS all right, sadly just a tad too much.

Due to the recent comic book adaptation craze including "Superman" and "Spiderman", "Ghost Rider" is no different. Unless you read the comics (which I haven't) there is nothing to compare it to. For me it's a cheesy, poorly crafted piece of overly redundant CGI garbage which results in nothing more than 10 seconds action sequences and over the top talk-talk-talking about "being the rider". The only time the screen justly held my attention was when Nic Cage first changes and the few scenes that don't concentrate on his stupid Nemesis Blackheart. The villains are lame, the effects were even worse than "The Hulks", and Eva Mendes had nothing more to do than show off some cleavage. Over all skip-able and way to hyped up, lets pray to god there isn't a sequel but with Hollywood adapting every comic there is, chances are 2008 can call for "Ghost Rider 2" - **

**** Will Smith, Thandie Newton, Jaden Smith, Brian Howe, Dan Castellanta. Directed by Gabriele Muccino. After seeing the trailers for this movie and some of the sad scenes I was moved nearly to tears. Thankfully this is not just a sad movie, it has comedy and a joyful message. Not to say that there are not a few tear jerking scenes but "Pursuit" is not one note, it at least moves around and has a chance to give an inspirational outlook. A struggling salesman (Smith, shoe in for a best Actor nod) after losing his wife (Newton) is down on life, when he tries to make a better one for him and his son (Smith) he tries to land an internship for stock broking. "Pusuit" for me is absolutely outstanding, it is a very emotional film and thankfully more than just one. One of the years best

"The Grudge 2" is pretty straight forward, wait let me rephrase. It is not straight forward this movie bounces all over the place with no sense of directions at all. For more than 90 minutes it did the same redundant sequences, cut to this state and have someone see the little Japanese child or the one lady with long hair. If I could even begin to tell you the story of a young woman who goes to Toyko to see her sister (Gellar, yeah from the first one) who is in the hospital after battling the evil grudge (?!). After that some teenagers let the curse out where it follows them around and comes to all the different states. But you'd never know that because the director just cuts here and there after a possible jolting moment, honestly I wouldn't know cause I was on the verge of sleeping. I don't know why I saw this, I hated the first one and saying this is a tad better isn't saying much! One of the years most annoying, scare free, idiotic and worst movies. - *1/2

What started as a low budget film in 1974 which quickly in the 80's and 90's transformed in a cult classic. Kudos to the guy that started it all Tobe Hooper (Arguably his best and most well known work) including his recent lackluster direct to video releases. Although this is about the 6th installment to the TCM series including director Marcus Nispel's remake in 2003. Who uses nice camera techniques to make this redundant and over killed story line still decent and worth the price of admission.

A pretty straight forward story line - a group of stereotypical teenagers (dim-witted and bickering about junk) are traveling on a trip to drop off Dean (Taylor Handley) and Eric (Matthew Bomer) who are departing for Vietnam with their girlfriends Chrissie (Jordana Brewster) and Bailey (Diora Baird). Little do they know a family of hillbilly yokels consisting of foul mouth and a comical relief to the carnage (R.Lee Ermy) reprising his role as Sheriff Hoyt who drags the kids to the Hewitt house where a disfigured psychopath Leather face (Andrew Bryniarski) quietly waits for them. Throughout the course of the night the kids try to survive the bloodbath that ensues (obviously they do not, but you know that going in) Although this movie is typical and almost stupid to watch it does give you what you want to see - a gigantic nut wielding a chainsaw at teenagers through the woods. If you like to see people ripped to shreds and laughing at some very disturbing moments courtesy of Mr. Ermy then by all means see this movie, you will love it. On the other hand if you like a movie with a story and is something that isn't being re-re made then this obviously isn't for you. Screenwriter Sheldon Turner has a great sense for maniacal gore and a creepy sense of humor which only helps move the movie along quicker. He does a nice job connecting the 2003 version to this with the birth of the family and each and every detail you could think up. TCM is a nice treat right in time for Halloween - **½

The third installment to the "Furious" series where new low-life street punk (Black) moves to to Toyko with a relative after a street race turned dangerous. While there he get into the world of drifting, an underground street race where the light cars drift in the wind like a feather. Although in theory I should hate this movie for bad acting, stupid story and it's over all predictability-but it evens out with nice cars and some well done racing. Not to mention a few hot girls that'll catch your eye. "Furious" is nothing that will leave you breathless at least for me, but the race scenes are enough to recommend if you are a fan. I am not a fan of this series and saying this is the best doesn't say too much but enough to say-watch it. Director Lin does some nice camera techniques to make it more enjoyable and seem shorter than it is. Kudos for holding Diesel off to the last minute - **1/2

Okay, a preppy teen movie about a low life teen who screws around and winds up at a gymnastic training camp. Where she was two years prior where she made it to the Nationals and bailed from cold feet. While there she meets a lousy, terrible coach (Bridges, being a terrible actor) who seems to know nothing but discipline. "Stick it" is more along the lines of a piece of garbage, the acting is bad. Most of the training involves junk skateboard punk/alternative music and honestly who wants to see a movie about gymnastics? Especially one an hour and 43 minutes long! The director obviously has no training other than well going to a gymnastic school where maybe he should have went to a directing school instead. Some of the flipping around is interesting, if put on mute to nod out the annoying music, but aside from that this is a bad teen movie. This coming from the mouth of the age group this was intended for. I have a great place they can STICK this, right in the trash! - *1/2

A mediocre at best horror flick that deals with dumb, not so horny teens who discover an evil video game (GASP) is killing those who die in the game (DOUBLE GASP). This movie is the sustained mystery of the Mystery Gang in "Scooby Doo". I was waiting for them to pull off a mask of one of the villains. I could deal with this for 40 minutes even as a movie on sci-fi but going all the way to the theaters, come on people. The effects were very mediocre, this whole scenario is something of crummy two-but director Uwe Boll, since this would be his cast. As always the great thing about video game systems is the glorious power button. I'd suggest using that mid-viewing. *1/2

*1/2 Josh Hartnett, Morgan Freeman, Bruce Willis, Lucy Lui, Ben Kingsley. Okay since the 90's when Tarantino did "Pulp Fiction" everyone is trying to take on that oh so cool mood in film. But "Selvin" tries too hard and all the attempts result in an annoying ,confusing piece of utter wanna be noir garbage. A young kid (Hartnett) who gets his identity confused is brought and mixed up with two mob bosses (Freeman and Kingsley). This movie was far too complicated to even enjoy, you have about five things all clustered together. "Slevin"'s whole story line is what you've seen before, perhaps a nice slice of FICTION. By far one of the years most forgettable and worst films

****, the first of two major motion pictures depicting 9/11 and the horrific events that would follow. The other being Stone's "World Trade Center" and the best of the two "United 93" does a top notch job. You would figure it would take on so many aspects, with characters and more plots, and the President. But it doesn't, it settles on people, it's real. These people are strangers to us but we get emotionally involved, that is what makes Greengrass a great writer/director here. He takes real people and makes it work to a well formulated story of heroism.

The story of course about the few passengers about flight 93 who took the courage to defy the terrorist who have hijacked it. Most of the characters played by no name actors, which I love. I am glad I didn't see Tom Cruise in there screaming or over acting on the plane. Another reason why "United" works, it has every essence of an ordinary film, almost low budget with a big heart.

This movie does not make fun of the people who lost their lives that day, it salutes them. This movie is beautiful, inspirational and one of the years must see films. I loved this movie and the last 15 minutes will leave you breathless and amazed. A certain for Best Pic/director and screenplay

** Mark Wahlberg, Greg Kinnear, Elizabeth Banks, Kevin Conway, Dov Davidoff. Directed by Ericson Core. We've seen this whole set up before, an underdog defies the team and does the impossible by achieving his dream in baseball, basketball or in this case football. This time the schmuck is Wahlberg who when a cruddy team holds open try outs they draft Wahlberg. Of course going over the clichéd obstacles of the other team mates and just making the cut with a new coach (Kinnear).

This whole set up is predictable and the wigs are laughable, some of the look like cheap toupees found on the sidewalk. The only thing INVINCIBLE about this is the story line which keeps going and going every year down from "Remember the Titans". Disney continues to prove dreams do come true, maybe next year so will mine, END IT.

Although I did like the cinematography, the playing in the rain and the symbolism of those scene and friendship. But after two long hours of nonstop training and running the movie much like the acting and everything else here gets tired. I don't hate sports movies but am biased against them like earlier this years "Glory Road". The all follow the same aspects in that genre. "Invincible" can only go so far before it stops

**** Steve Carrel, Greg Kinnear, Toni Collette, Alan Arkin, Paul Dano, Abigail Bresling. Directed by Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris

We've seen this concept before there's no doubt about that, but we have not seen this take on it. Newcomers Dayton and Faris prove to be a great talent when packing an ensemble cast that just bursts with comic genius, kudos to Oscar worthy Carrell. Not to leave anyone else out, including Collette and maybe a nod for Kinnear who just plays it off like he is so smart and wonderful, a true jackass

After a low on life Uncle (Carrell) commits suicide and fails, he moves back in with his sister (Collette) and her husband (Kinnear). Along with their son (Dano) who's committed to a vow of silence, Grandpa (Arkin) who's up on heroin and their sweet daughter (Breslin, another talent to watch). When the good news about her getting into a beauty contest arrives, it brings the bad news as well. This out of touch family has to bond while treading the states in a broken down VW bus.

This screenplay is original, and does not depend on swearing the laughs off. Instead it uses shear joy and the simplicity of this family as the tool. They may be unbelievably stupid and moronic but they are a family nonetheless. "Sunshine" is perfect in every single way, I laughed, I grew with these characters. I think it should get a few Oscar nods, and am very happy that my theater picked up this Sundance film. Hands down, the one film you must see all year long

**, After all the nonstop ranting about "Snakes" it has finally been released along with a large cult following. But you don't become a cult classic before you are released okay, they build all this hype but look at "Night of the Living Dead" that's a cult classic because it was original in the 60's. "Snakes" is an idiotic, campy play about an assassin bent on killing a witness with a large array of venomous snakes. The only thing between the snakes and the witness is an angry cop who apparently hates snakes (Jackson, laughing it up). "Snakes" will be a big success, I did not find it funny or campy but just down right stupid. The concept is good but some things are better left untouched. (Dir. David R Ellis)

**1/2 Mo'Nique, Jimmy Jean-Louis, Godfrey, Kendra C. Johnson, Joyful Drake. Directed by Nnegest Likke'. Skeptical at first since I'd assume it was just big black women screaming "bitch" the whole time, but was delightfully surprised. A plus sized woman (Mo'Nique) with dreams of becoming a fashion designer for other plus sized women, wins a trip with her friends (Drake and Johnson) to a 5-Star resort. There finding love with a Nigerian doctor (Louis) who wins her heart and respect. "Phat Girlz" although not great enough to buy still gets a good rating from me. I was surprised through this whole movie and gladly at that. For a rental, go with this over that heap "Silent Hill"

** Radha Mitchell, Laure Holden, Sean Bean, Kim Coates, Tanya Allen, Jodelle Ferland. Directed by Christophe Gans. What starts as a typical video game ala cinema slowly turns from mindless creature action to mindless talking about a deserted town due to a fire in Silent Hill. Currently heading to the town a mother (Mitchell) and her creepy child (Ferland) but when they reach the town, they discover it's dark past and hidden present. "Silent Hill" attempts to make noise but with it's many lousy failed mishaps it echoes in silence. Despite those effects that dragged me into it, with the creatures and all, the movie still holds many flaws. Gans has no technique other than effects and plenty of them aside the incoherent story line, regrettable overall

**** Shauna Macdonald, Natalie Mendoza, Alex Reid, Saskia Mulder, MyAnna Buring, Nora-Jane No one. Directed by Neil Marshall. Possibly the best and scariest horror film I have seen in dog years, this does what "The Cave" could not. When a cave expedition amongst friends goes wrong, leaving them trapped under the surface a group of hungry predators make their mark. Even though "The Descent" is a horror film it works really well as a thriller, surprisingly it has a good footing and a smart background. Writer and director Marshall uses great camera work with both his and a camcorder to bring that edgy feeling. Even though it is set in the darkness of the cave there is still enough lighting to show the gruesome acts which take place. I loved and enjoyed every gory minute of this blood fest, Mendoza was my personal favorite of the group

Robin Williams, Cheryl Hines, Jeff Daniels, Jo Jo, Josh Hutcherson. Directed by Barry Sonnenfeld . "R.V" is a tired old family fun pic which National Lampoons buried into the ground in the 80's with "Vacation" but still Sonnenfeld hopes to resurrect the dead storyline by pumping in stars like Daniels, Williams and Hines. But sadly even those three actors can not save this annoying, tired cliché piece of garbage that is one of the years absolute worst films. A working man (Williams) is forced to take his dysfunctional family on the road in a rental R.V instead of a trip to Hawia so he can keep his job. After all the exploits of the road such as, fecal matter, annoying campers (Daniels), and getting lost along the way "R.V" has but one saving grace...it ended just in time before I killed myself from the extreme, loud annoying performances by such untalented teens (Jo Jo).

***1/2 Scarlett Johansson, Woody Allen, Hugh Jackman, Ian McShane, Romola Garia. Directed by Woody Allen. Just after his work with Johansson on "Match Point" the two return for "Scoop" a Corky, zany and fun comic ride. When a student reporter (Johansson) finds out a new scoop from a deceased reporter (McShane) when she enters the materializer of a lame magician (Allen). The scoop being of the new Tarot Card killer in London who might be preppy Peter Lyman (Jackman); while Sondra and Sid are playing detective Sondra falls in love for the handsome would be killer. Allen has finally hit a mark, not as good as "Match Point" but definitely more fun. I laughed a lot more than I expected, one of the years must sees

***1/2 Nicholas Cage, Michael Pena, Maria Bello, Jy Hernandez, Morgan Flynn. Directed by Oliver Stone. A new avenue for Stone as he takes on September 11, in a PG-13 film. As apposed to his normal R ratings with "Platoon" and "Natural Born Killers". Two Port Authority policemen John McLoughlin (Cage) and Will Jimena (Pena, a shot for Best Supporting Actor) who get trapped in the rubble when the towers collapse. Also taking on the lives of their wives, (Bello, excellent performance Best Supp Actress worthy). The true story of these men is inspiring, touching and near tear jerking. The amazing score only helps make the ending go even further, it takes 9/11 to new heights. Although a bit tiresome and dragged on with four different endings Stone uses great skill and pulls them together as one of the years best films.

** Larry the Cable Guy, Iris Bahr, David Koechner. Directed by Trent Cooper. Although I am not a hick I tend to like the "Blue Collar" team of Ron White and Foxworthy but Larry in a full movie doesn't seem to work well. A health inspector (Larry) is assigned a partner (Bahr, another blah performance) and the two have to track down the person behind the recent food poisoning in fancy restaurants. Larry has his usual stupid jokes about red necks and other idiotic misplaced jokes that seem to deliver soggy punchline (at best) and without a full antic dote. Director Cooper obviously just said "go out there" since there is no true comedy in it. Another deceiving trailer if I ever saw one, "Health Inspector" doesn't quite "GIT-R-DONE"

Brain O'Halloran, Jeff Anderson, Jason Mewes, Rosario Dawson, Kevin Smith, Trevor Fehrman and Jeniffer Schwalbach. (Cameos by: Ethan Suplee, Jason Lee, Ben Affleck). Directed by Kevin Smith. After 12 years and many films, Kevin Smith returns with his rude, crude and brass sense of humor with the obscene clerks. After a fire burns down the Quick Stop Dante (O'Halloran) and Randal (Anderson, in an Oscar worthy role, I know right) are forced to enter the world of a fictional Disney like restaurant Mooby's. Where the duo do the same thing in the job, make fun of customers and a geeky LOTR fan Elias (Fehrman). While Dante is in the mist of a life crisis and has to make the decision of whether to leave his pal Randal forever. And the return of the new and improved Jay (Mewes) and Silent Bob (Smith), not to mention a lovely credit to Levine's "Tuck" Dance from "Silence of the Lambs", creepy in full form. "Clerks 2" is a nice return to the counter culture world, that does ring true. Smith truly has an ingenious sense of humor and also throws in a few dramatic notes in the end, kudos to Anderson on the tidy delivery. The funniest movie I've seen since the "40 Year Old Virgin"

***1/2 Johnny Deep, Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley, Bill Nighy, Jack Davenport, Lee Arenberg and Mackenzie Crook. Directed by Gore Verbinski

The sequel to 2003's summer smash hit "Pirates: Curse of the Black Pearl" comes the new and near more entertaining summer blockbuster for 2006. I've gotten to see a lot of so-called "extravaganzas" like "Poseidon", "Da Vinci Code" and "Superman Returns" and I am pleased to say "Dead Man's Chest" does not disappoint in it's efforts. Instead each scene is well crafted by original director Verbinski (Showcasing some talent this time around in his directing) to make it by far the most entertaining movie I've seen all year.

Cunning Captain Jack Sparrow (Depp, savvy?) is being hunted down by the legendary "locker" owner Davy Jones (Nighy, respectfully) to repay his debt. While a Elizabeth (Knightley) and Will (Bloom) get prepared for there wedding until forced to find Jack and retrieve a valuable compass. Also joining the crew are the two ex- immortal Pirates from the Black Pearl (Arenberg and Crook). And Crook gets the laughs with his eye popping in and out at times

"Pirates" although with a run time of 2 hours and a handful of minutes does not bore with a tiresome story line. Instead 90 percent of the run time is filled with action both on land and water. Kudos to the special effects team who did a great job with Davy's water logged ship and adding those little sea shells you find on the rocks. A dazzling display of directing and an all out beautiful film with great CGI. Certainly on the years MUST LIST, I for one savvy