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Reviews
Flood (2007)
Everybody gets wet - spoilers-
Admittedly I switched the TV on a bit late, so I missed the beginning of the movie. In fact, as I will relay a little further below, I also missed the movie's second half (approximately). You therefore have to take my critique with a grain of salt, as I may have missed a number of absolutely brilliant moments. The scene that greeted my upon switching on consisted of a bunch of people congregating around a suitably large screen in some sort of central command type headquarters, which are often found in movies of this type. They stare at an oncoming tsunami wave, which is frighteningly high. One woman says 'oh my God!', which certainly struck me as an appropriate remark. Then they let the camera pan around a bit, to see what else of interest may be happening nearby. And lo!, they discover a man in the water, paddling frantically. Apparently he is known to them, as the aforementioned woman shouts: 'We need this man immediately!'. But why would they need him? Does he have a giant sponge that could be used to remove the excess water? No! In fact, since he is evidently dripping wet, it's a good bet he would ruin the carpet if invited in. The wetness, which is ubiquitous in this movie, would penetrate into one of the few sets that are still dry. We can only surmise that the people at the HQ weren't thinking that far due to being in shock. Upon closer inspection, it turns out that the wet man is Robert Carlyle, so maybe they wanted an autograph? In the meantime, the tsunami wave proceeds to flood a faintly familiar looking town. Curiously though, the whole process seems not particularly threatening, compared to the real life tidal waves we have seen in recent years. For instance, this wave for some reason totally refuses to carry any debris along. Also, the water bedecking the town is basically ankle deep, so it seems more a nuisance than a genuine threat. As you might imagine though, nearly everybody in this movie gets thoroughly wet. Not even in 'Waterworld' are there that many wet people. A number of people, including the aforementioned Robert Carlyle then walk about below ground, sitting around in subway stations, which for (to me) unknown reasons they cannot leave by the normal exits. Naturally walking around there is a bad idea, since the water can be expected to flood the area. Why they went there in the first place was slightly baffling to me. However, the water turns out to be extremely considerate. Instead of flooding everything at once, it decides to wait a bit whenever the group decides to rest a little while for a chat. At one point they actually look almost dry. They then climb up a shaft containing a fire escape type ladder, which struck me as a reasonably good idea in view of the lack of normal exits. At that point I fell asleep, in spite of the fact that I was actually not tired prior to watching the movie. So I cannot tell you much more unfortunately, except that it seems likely that the movie is a healthy, natural means of battling insomnia and thus can be recommended as an alternative to taking sleeping pills. At one point I was woken up again by sad choral music, and briefly glimpsed dead people floating in the ankle-deep water. To call them bad swimmers is probably an understatement. For those who managed to stay awake, I sincerely hope that the suspense coefficient went up a little in the second half of the movie. Of course given what can only be called a cursory acquaintance with the movie, I can also not be sure whether it addressed any deep philosophical questions. That is a distinct possibility, given the serious expressions several of the actors occasionally wore. Obviously things of grave import were held to be transpiring. Keep in mind that my slightly below average 2 out of 10 rating concerns only the part I actually saw.
The Minion (1998)
They simply don't come any better....(minor spoilers, but do read on)
What a scorching ride of a movie! Never has a better film been made, ever! One wonders why it was so carelessly neglected by the Academy Awards? The best actor who ever lived, Adolphus Lundgren, graces the movie with his presence, with this shining luminary of the thespian arts miming a black-clad Knight Templar in his inimitable, hard-hitting fashion. Not only that, but the movie contains an excellent portrayal of the lost art of archeology, showing some earnest and well-intentioned digging in an abandoned subway shaft that unfortunately goes horribly wrong. A denizen of the nether regions is released, to everyone's understandably great consternation. The remainder of the plot is too complex to rehash in a few sentences, let us just say that it continually keeps you on the edge of your seat with its captivating twists and turns. The supporting actors orbiting the Great One in this movie must have descended from supporting actor heaven...one grasps in vain for the proper superlatives to adequately praise their superb work. There are numerous fight scenes, which perhaps may strike some of you as superfluous given the earnest subject matter, but let me assure you they all have their place. There isn't a single scene in this movie one could possibly cut without maiming its subtle and important message. Besides, the fight scenes probably have made scores of Hong-Kong movie makers realize how starved their industry is for truly memorable choreography. The grace and fluidity of the fisticuffs is simply out of this world. What else can I say? If you have but one hour left to live, this movie is what you should spend the time with. It's THAT good.
Sphere (1998)
why Crichton stories seldom make good movies
Sphere certainly has its moments, and the high caliber cast enhances the film's overall quality quite a bit. the beginning of the movie is quite engaging, and the highpoint in terms of suspense is reached when the alien intelligence reveals itself and turns out to have the mind of a vengeful child. however, thereafter it all goes a bit downhill, as others have remarked. i've noticed that this observation is made with astonishing frequency in connection with films based on Crichton novels. it's always 'it started out good, but then...' or 'it had potential, but...' or 'it could have been so much better'. i have in the meantime read several of Crichton's novels and come to the conclusion that this phenomenon has probably little to do with the inability of film makers to do his books justice. it is the stories themselves that harbor this weakness. they're all full of promise that remains unfulfilled. i can't even put my finger on it with any precision...what is missing is a certain 'je-ne-sais-quoi'. apparently, this gets transported to movies that are based on Crichton novels quite flawlessly...they all leave you with a sense of what could have been, but wasn't. all that said, Sphere is certainly watchable, and at times quite suspenseful. it joins a long list of 'hard' sci-fi movies with an interesting premise that failed to attain their full potential ('Event Horizon' and 'Abyss' being other examples).