My personal worst movies ever
This is just my own personal opinion on the worst movies ever. Feel free to disagree if you must but most of these picks are pretty horrible.
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- DirectorChris RobertsStarsFreddie Prinze Jr.Matthew LillardSaffron BurrowsBlair, a fighter pilot, joins an interstellar war to fight the evil Kilrathi who are trying to destroy the universe.It seems like a good idea on paper, taking an action-packed video game famous for it's very well-done cinematics, some semi-huge names and an impressive visual style to the big screen. However, the movie drains out all action and replaces it with confusing scenes of non-stop talking that are near incomprehensible and continous obnoxious scenes of Matthew Lillard thinking he's Jim Carrey make this feel more like an attempt to cash in on Phantom Menace hype than make a legitimate movie.
- DirectorMartin CampbellStarsRyan ReynoldsBlake LivelyPeter SarsgaardReckless test pilot Hal Jordan is granted an alien ring that bestows him with otherworldly powers that inducts him into an intergalactic police force, the Green Lantern Corps.Ever wonder why DC Comics doesn't make too many movies that don't involve Batman? Here's your answer. Like Wing Commander, Green Lantern drains all action out of the picture and devotes itself to talking scenes that barely advance any resemblance of a plot, instead it just tries to mimic the tone the Iron Man movies succeed in using. Hal Jordan has 0 character development and as for the supporting cast, a dock has more personality than the characters in this slop. Thank god this movie flopped and we won't see anymore of this zero of a hero unless Chris Nolan decides to get involved.
- DirectorKeenen Ivory WayansStarsMarlon WayansShawn WayansBusy PhilippsTwo disgraced FBI agents go way undercover in an effort to protect hotel heiresses the Wilson sisters from a kidnapping plot.I haven't seen this movie since I was 13 but even still the fact that it was such a horrible, unfunny movie has still stuck with me. Obnoxiously annoying, I considered it the worst movie I've ever seen until I watched Wing Commander. What's saddest of all is that the Wayan brothers still continue to make movies... if you want a good crossdressing comedy, watch Mrs. Doubtfire, not this. If you do want to watch it, you may want to take anything you can use to kill yourself out of the room...
- DirectorMichael BayStarsShia LaBeoufMegan FoxJosh DuhamelSam Witwicky leaves the Autobots behind for a normal life. But when his mind is filled with cryptic symbols, the Decepticons target him and he is dragged back into the Transformers' war.I despise the first Transformers but this one is even worse. It moves at a snail's pace, I honestly felt like I was growing a full beard watching this movie, and is pretty obnoxious in it's attempts at comedy. And again, like the first film, I can't tell which robots I'm supposed to be cheering for. Having a 3-hour movie works for some, but not for this. It's just too boring for it's own good.
- DirectorAndrzej BartkowiakStarsKristin KreukNeal McDonoughMichael Clarke DuncanWhen a child, Chun-Li sees her father being captured by wealthy gangster Bison. When she grows up, she goes into a quest for justice and bring down the criminal organization Shadaloo which is led by Bison.A well-intentioned attempt to Nolan-ize a franchise that shouldn't be Nolan-ized. The problem is that the way the movie is presented is way too dark, serious and cruel than what the bland script calls for. Had this been campy or even as an intentional spoof, it still would have been bad but it would have been easier to sit through.
- DirectorCaroline ThompsonStarsRene RussoRobbie ColtraneAlan CummingA depiction of the true life story of Gertrude Lintz, an eccentric 1920's socialite who tries to raise a gorilla, like many chimps before him, as part of her family.I did a video review of this movie you can find online and I despise it just as much as I did then. A waste of a truly talented cast, a truly talented special effects company and a story that could have been handled properly had they not felt the need to pander the movie to little kids by having trained chimps constantly hijack the movie for long periods, horrible gorilla animatronics and shows Gertrude Lintz to be a spoiled lunatic, which in reality she certainly was not.
- DirectorDennis DuganStarsAdam SandlerSalma HayekKevin JamesAfter their high school basketball coach passes away, five good friends and former teammates reunite for a Fourth of July holiday weekend.To me, Adam Sandler = avoid at all costs but I did get dragged to this one and, since it's here, you can tell I didn't enjoy it one bit. Not so much a movie as it is a collage of random gags, it is obnoxious, annoying and doesn't justify it's cast.
- DirectorJonathan FrakesStarsJesse BradfordFrench StewartPaula GarcésA teenager accidentally activates a machine that enables him to speed up his body so that other people seem to be standing still.Even when I saw this movie in theaters as a kid, I knew it was a piece of crap. It gains a spot on this list mostly due to it's incredibly misleading marketing, the ads stated the watch could stop time. What it actually does is slow down time... and the screenwriters decide to switch between both ideas which just makes the movie confusing and leads to some very dull action sequences that just don't make this movie fun.
- DirectorChris MillerRaman HuiStarsMike MyersCameron DiazEddie MurphyReluctantly designated as the heir to the land of Far, Far Away, Shrek hatches a plan to install the rebellious Artie as the new king while Princess Fiona tries to fend off a coup d'état by the jilted Prince Charming.The straw that broke the camel's back at DreamWorks Animation for a while. Easily the worst film the studio has released, Shrek the Third actually has a terrific concept incorporating the King Arthur folklore but drowns it in fart jokes and pop culture references and makes Arthur a whiny brat child who adds nothing to the franchise. Aside from Eric Idle as Merlin and some occasional chuckle-worthy lines, this film is just pure horse droppings. Thank goodness DreamWorks realized this format didn't work anymore and ditched the next year with Kung Fu Panda.
- DirectorKunihiko YuyamaStarsVeronica TaylorRica MatsumotoIkue ÔtaniAsh Ketchum must gather the three spheres of fire, ice and lightning in order to restore balance to the Orange Islands.The first Pokemon movie is bad, but it at least has nostalgic value. This one is just plain stupidity. So an age old prophesy points to some 10-year old kid who's name is in a poem that refers to his name as an object and not a name? Not to mention the movie mostly just consists of giant birds screaming, which gets really old really fast, and a villain who is as interesting as an empty fishbowl.
- DirectorEric BrevigStarsBrendan FraserJosh HutchersonAníta BriemOn a quest to find out what happened to his missing brother, a scientist, his nephew and their mountain guide discover a fantastic and dangerous lost world in the center of the earth.Ever gone to see a 3D movie at Disney World or Universal Studios? Imagine that stretched out to an hour and a half. It gets really old really fast. Brendan Fraser just has to stop making movies. It's sad that this was the first 3D movie I ever saw in a real movie theater, this would be enough to turn me away from the format for good. And they are making a sequel?! I hope it flops.