Not For The Cool Kids Reviewed Movies
A list of all the movies we've reviewed!
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128 titles
- DirectorDamian LeeStarsJesse VenturaSven-Ole ThorsenDamian LeeAn alien "policeman" arrives on Earth to apprehend a renegade of his own race who impregnates a woman with a potentially destructive mutant embryo.
- DirectorJames BryanStarsChristopher MitchumAldo RayAntoine John MottetAn L.A. cop and a reporter team up to find a masked serial killer.
- DirectorWilliam SachsStarsBill AdlerCynthia WoodDennis BowenA small-town kid hears about the wild nights of cruising the boulevard in Van Nuys, California. He drives out there to check it out, and gets involved with drag racers, topless dancers and bikers.
- DirectorGordon HesslerStarsPeter CrissAce FrehleyGene SimmonsKISS, a rock band made up of superheroes, battles an evil inventor who has plans for destruction at a California amusement park.
- DirectorPeter GeorgeStarsGail NeelyRobert HardenBarry BrennerWhen the son of a gun-wielding woman is murdered by neo-Nazi surf punks in the post-apocalyptic future, his Mama hunts them down for some bloodthirsty revenge.
- DirectorJohn Elias MichalakisStarsMichael RubinSteve McCoyGeorge SeminaraTeenage vigilantes kill a drug pusher only to have him return as a zombie.
- DirectorFrancis Ford CoppolaStarsWilliam CampbellLuana AndersBart PattonA scheming widow hatches a bold plan to acquire her late husband's inheritance, unaware that she is being targeted by an ax murderer who lurks in the family's estate.
- DirectorGeorge MerriweatherStarsMichael McGaharnElizabeth KeyRichard NeilA bumbling detective, along with his loyal sidekick and a man in a dog suit, tracks down a sultry chainsaw murderess!
- DirectorTom DeSimoneStarsLinda BlairVincent Van PattenPeter BartonFour college pledges are forced to spend the night in a deserted old mansion, where they are stalked by the monstrous survivor of a family massacre years earlier.
- DirectorJosé Briz MéndezStarsJoseph CottenWilliam ShatnerRosanna YanniTwin brothers, half white and half Comanche, take different paths that overlap with Johnny Moon getting blamed for Notah's violent acts until the final confrontation in Rio Hondo.
- DirectorDavid HeavenerStarsDavid HeavenerRebecca HoldenRic WhiteJon 141 founds himself stuck in a world of out-of-control reality TV. Every week, he has to fight for higher ratings and his life. But now, the network wants more viewers, and sleazy producer Quinton McBride knows just how to do it. By destroying Earth along with Jon 141. Will he be able to battle evil and save Earth at the same time?
- DirectorChristopher LeitchStarsJason BatemanKim DarbyJohn AstinTodd Howard is a struggling college student. Nothing seems to be going very well for him, until he turns into a wolf.
- DirectorJack HillStarsLon Chaney Jr.Carol OhmartQuinn K. RedekerA caretaker devotes himself to three demented siblings after their father's death.
- DirectorKurt VossStarsAlyssa MilanoJustin TherouxIce-TThe seemingly idyllic Simpson family gathers for Thanksgiving, but when a pack of killers shows up, their bickering take a back seat.
- DirectorWorth KeeterStarsSteven BauerChelsea FieldPamela AndersonTwo men have already been killed during intercourse by a prostitute. The young Sergeant Peckham is transferred from vice to homicide squad for the investigation.
- DirectorJoseph MandukeStarsLee Van CleefJim BrownJohn MarleyTom's parents are killed by Mexicans after their leader (Van Cleef) rapes his mother as he watched. He sets out to exact revenge and is ultimately helped by a successful gold prospector who has been robbed by the same group.
- DirectorMatt CimberStarsJayne MansfieldDorothy KellerFabian DeanThe fall of a blonde, Mansfield, from innocence to prostitution. Mansfield died before the movie was completed.
- DirectorMichael Paul GirardStarsSteven CookeLezlie Z. McCrawRick McDowellSchool nerd Bill just wants to save the world and to score a date with cheerleader babe Chrissie Schackler. Both become real possibilities when he finds an alcoholic Leprechaun in a beer bottle he was about to recycle. Wacky hijinks ensue as the leprechaun, Lepkey, messes up a few of the wishes. Can Bill fight off school jock Tony Chanuka and marry Chrissie so they can fulfill their dream of opening a clinic?
- DirectorRobert AndersonStarsDebbie OsborneNancy IsonCheryl PowellShy young Cindy nervously explores her sexuality in the swingin' '60's, with the help of her step-sister Donna.
- DirectorMichael HerzLloyd KaufmanStarsRick GianasiSusan ByunBill WeedenA streetwise New York police officer transforms into the world's most unusual superhuman hero.
- DirectorErnest R. DickersonStarsSnoop DoggPam GrierMichael T. WeissOver 20 years after his death by a gunshot, Jimmy Bones comes back as a ghost to wreak revenge on those who killed him and to clean up his neighborhood.
- DirectorPericles LewnesStarsSteve SooyAnthony M. CarrKen DavisA barrel of radioactive waste is lost out in the woods. Some demented rednecks find it and use it as part of their still. Everybody who drinks the liquor they produced turns into zombies.
- DirectorTommy Lee WallaceStarsTom AtkinsStacey NelkinDan O'HerlihyKids all over America want Silver Shamrock masks for Halloween. Doctor Daniel Challis seeks to uncover a plot by Silver Shamrock owner Conal Cochran.
- DirectorRichard BrandesStarsRachel MinerMimi RogersLucy Rogers-CiaffaYoung Penny goes on a retreat with her psychologist; the intention is to help her overcome her phobia, an intense fear of cars. Unexpected events find her in a nightmarish situation where her worst fears come true.
- DirectorJoe AndersonStarsTammin SursokChris JerichoRichard ChristyCollege students exploring the Ozark Mountains for a school assignment, stumble upon a group of scary, redneck cave-dwellers.
- DirectorAlan GibsonStarsChristopher LeePeter CushingMichael ColesIn 1974, Professor Lorrimer Van Helsing investigates a satanic cult on behalf of Scotland Yard, only to discover a plot by Count Dracula to commit global genocide.
- DirectorScott ThomasStarsDavid ChisumKristen KerrKevin J. O'ConnorA mad scientist is transferring a dead woman in a freezer with an armed guard on a plane to Paris. After slight turbulence, the freezer breaks down and she awakens, turns into a zombie, and infects all on board.
- DirectorMikael HåfströmStarsStefan SaukEnnio FantastichiniErland JosephsonTwo Swedish business men are kidnapped in Rome by the Mob, and moved to Sicily. Carl Hamilton is sent to Sicily on direct order from the Swedish Government. He is sent to negotiate for their release. Hamiltons partner and best friend, Lundwall, is murdered by the Mob. Hamilton is dragged into a bitter and brutal vendetta between himself and the Mob-leader Don Tommaso.
- DirectorMarcos SiegaStarsEvan Rachel WoodRon LivingstonJames WoodsA 15-year-old girl incites chaos among her friends and a media frenzy when she accuses her drama teacher of sexual harassment.
- DirectorWilliam Byron HillmanStarsCharlene TiltonDavid HeavenerAllan RichAfter his girlfriend is kidnapped by a vicious mobster, Cage rips into action with a vengeance. Retired from kickboxing to pursue dreams of being an entertainer, Cage is forced into a death match with the brutal doctor death. He must win, or he will die.
- DirectorFred Olen RayStarsLyle WaggonerRuss TamblynBlake BahnerA swordsman helps a young girl fight an evil wizard for possession of the magic Knife of Aktar, which gives its owner unlimited power. The girl wants it to help free her imprisoned father, and the wizard is after it for his own reasons.
- DirectorTom DeSimoneStarsLinda CarolWendy O. WilliamsPat AstA new group of girls arrives at Pridemore Juvenile Facility, where the brutal warden plays favoritism with a few, and treats the rest like animals. But one girl is not taking this horrible treatment lying down.
- DirectorAdam GreenJoe LynchBear McCrearyStarsAdam RifkinSarah MutchRay WiseIt's the closing night at the last drive-in theatre in America, and manager, Cecil Kaufman's planned to show 4 movies; films so rare, they've never been exhibited publicly on American soil, until tonight.
- DirectorCharles E. Sellier Jr.StarsLilyan ChauvinGilmer McCormickToni NeroLittle Billy witnesses his parents getting killed by Santa after being warned by his senile grandpa that Santa punishes those who are naughty. Now Billy is 18 and out of the orphanage, and he has just become Santa himself.
- DirectorDavid SteimanStarsBill GoldbergDouglas SmithEmilie de RavinSanta Claus is actually a demon who lost a bet with an angel, so he becomes the giver of toys and happiness. But when the bet is off, he returns to his evil ways.
- DirectorRobbie BryanStarsGabrielle AnwarWilliam ForsytheTony ToddA mysterious love triangle leads to a tragic shooting. Months later, eight members of a MySpace-esque chat room are being gruesomely murdered in the privacy of their own homes.
- DirectorRodger GrossmanStarsShane WestRick GonzalezBijou PhillipsThe true-life story of Darby Crash, who became an L.A. punk icon after getting kicked out of high school and forming The Germs with a collection of friends who have little experience with their instruments or playing music.
- DirectorGeorge LekovicStarsMichael ParéCharles DurningBeverly LynneThrough a series of horrific murders, the occult, biblical prophecy and sex clash in a melee of gore and mystery, with psychiatrists, attorneys, homicide detectives and rock stars all being suspects.
- DirectorQuentin DupieuxStarsStephen SpinellaRoxane MesquidaWings HauserA homicidal car tire, discovering it has destructive psionic power, sets its sights on a desert town once a mysterious woman becomes its obsession.
- DirectorJohn SaylesStarsJoe MortonDaryl EdwardsRosanna CarterA mute alien with the appearance of a black human is chased by outer-space bounty hunters through the streets of Harlem.
- DirectorBarry ShearStarsAnthony QuinnYaphet KottoAnthony FranciosaTwo New York City cops go after amateur crooks who are trying to rip off the Mafia and start a gang war.
- DirectorAlbert PyunStarsChristopher LambertIce-TMichael Halsey100 people, who have betrayed The Syndicate, are gathered in a prison opening the next day. They are given weapons and 6 hours to kill each other. The 3 remaining share $10,000,000.
- DirectorAlbert MagnoliStarsPrinceApollonia KoteroMorris DayA young musician, tormented by an abusive situation at home, must contend with a rival singer, a burgeoning romance, and his own dissatisfied band, as his star begins to rise.
- DirectorAaron AitesAudrey EwellStarsFenrizVarg VikernesEuronymousInterviews and news footage explore the rise of black metal music in Norway in the 1990s, including artists who were involved in suicide, murder and arson.
- DirectorOctavio CortázarStarsPatricio WoodSalvador WoodRené de la CruzIn the early years of the Cuban revolution, a young Havana student volunteers to go to a poor rural region to teach peasants how to read and write; he's sent to the Ciénega de Zapata zone, where squads of anti-Castro guerrilla operate; he happens to teach the wife of a squad leader; trouble and confrontation ensues when government militia makes the little town its operations base.
- DirectorRob SperaStarsWarwick DavisIce-TAnthony MontgomeryWhen three rappers want to get even with a pimp, they accidentally unleash a leprechaun who goes on a killing rampage in tha 'hood.
- DirectorAndy SidarisStarsKevin LightCristian LetelierJulie StrainThe Agency's computer database is compromised by a powerful criminal named "The Warrior". Now, with the list of all the undercover agents' identities in hand, he is going after them, one by one.
- DirectorPaul AndresenStarsViolent JShaggy 2 DopeTony BorcherdingIn the Wild West town of Mudbug, Sheriff Sugar Wolf arrives to confront an over-the-top villain, Big Baby Chips.
- DirectorAmy Holden JonesStarsMichele MichaelsRobin StilleMichael VillellaA female high school student's slumber party turns into a bloodbath, as a newly escaped psychotic serial killer wielding a power drill prowls her neighborhood.
- DirectorLarry G. BrownStarsJohn AldermanTom BashamHenry OlekPlenty of heads turn when a group of transvestite bikers wheel their way to Los Angeles.
- DirectorLouis J. GasnierStarsDorothy ShortKenneth CraigLillian MilesCautionary tale that features a fictionalized take on marijuana use. A trio of drug dealers lead innocent teenagers to become addicted to "reefer" cigarettes by holding wild parties with jazz music.
- DirectorMichael HerzLloyd KaufmanStarsAndree MarandaMitch CohenJennifer BabtistTromaville has a monstrous new hero. The Toxic Avenger is born when meek mop boy Melvin falls into a vat of toxic waste. Now evildoers will have a lot to lose.
- DirectorStuart HazeldineStarsAdar BeckGemma ChanNathalie CoxEight candidates for a highly desirable corporate job are locked together in an exam room and given a final test with just one seemingly simple question. However, it doesn't take long for confusion to ensue and tensions to unravel.
- DirectorJohn HillcoatStarsRay WinstoneGuy PearceEmily WatsonA lawman apprehends a notorious outlaw and gives him nine days to kill his older brother, or else they'll execute his younger brother.
- DirectorAndy SidarisStarsJulie StrainRodrigo ObregónJulie K. SmithA stolen computer floppy disc filled with information about the location of a mythical treasure in Savage Island will lure both villains and L.E.T.H.A.L. Agents into a dangerous treasure hunt.
- DirectorMartin RosenJohn HubleyStarsJohn HurtRichard BriersRalph RichardsonHoping to escape destruction by human developers and save their community, a colony of rabbits, led by Hazel and Fiver, seek out a safe place to set up a new warren.
- DirectorAnnabel JankelRocky MortonStarsBob HoskinsJohn LeguizamoDennis HopperTwo Brooklyn plumbers, Mario and Luigi, must travel to another dimension to rescue a princess from the evil dictator King Koopa and stop him from taking over the world.
- DirectorJohn GuillerminStarsRichard RoundtreeFrank FinlayVonetta McGeePrivate investigator John Shaft is recruited to go undercover to break up a modern slavery ring where young Africans are lured to Paris to do chain-gang work.
- DirectorAbel FerraraStarsHarvey KeitelBrian McElroyFrank AcciaritoWhile investigating a young nun's rape, a corrupt New York City police detective, with a serious drug and gambling addiction, tries to change his ways and find forgiveness and redemption.
- DirectorDavid DeFalcoStarsRob Van DamDave BautistaLara GriceIn order to save his kidnapped daughter, an ex-Marine is forced to take on a gang of killers when an accident leaves the brother of a malicious criminal dead.
- DirectorJoseph GuzmanStarsAsun OrtegaDavid CastroPerry D'MarcoA left-for-dead nun forced into prostitution embarks on a deadly revenge mission to do the Lord's work, punishing sinners in a strictly personal vigilante Holy War.
- DirectorJason EisenerStarsRutger HauerPasha EbrahimiRobb WellsA homeless vigilante blows away crooked cops, pedophile Santas, and other scumbags with his trusty pump-action shotgun.
- DirectorJohn CarpenterStarsAustin StokerDarwin JostonLaurie ZimmerA Highway Patrol Officer, two criminals and a station secretary defend a defunct Los Angeles precinct office against a siege by a bloodthirsty street gang.
- DirectorNick CastleStarsLance GuestRobert PrestonKay E. KuterHigh schooler Alex Rogan conquers the Starfighter video game, only to find out it was just a test, and is transported to another planet. He has been recruited to join a team of the best starfighters to defend their world from the attack.
- DirectorDavid Oliver PfeilStarsDaniel RoebuckCynthia ThompsonDarren YoungThanks to a strange crystal, a shy student finds himself in the Stone Age, where he falls in love with a beautiful cave woman and helps her clan stave off a tribe of cannibals.
- DirectorSam PeckinpahStarsWarren OatesIsela VegaRobert WebberAn American barroom pianist and his prostitute girlfriend go on a trip through the Mexican underworld to collect the bounty on the head of a dead gigolo.
- DirectorThomas J. WrightStarsHulk HoganJoan SeveranceKurt FullerA TV-network boss pits a wrestler called Zeus against a wrestler called Rip in a wrestling match.
- DirectorLang ElliottStarsLou FerrignoReb BrownMichael DanteA GI in Vietnam saves his buddy's life, but in the process is shot in the head. The injury results in brain damage to the point where he basically has a child's brain in a (very large) man's body. When they get out of the Marine Corps, the two open up a bar together, but some local gangsters make things tough for them after they refuse to take part in brutal "cage" matches where fighters battle to the point of serious injury and/or death.
- DirectorStig SvendsenStarsChristopher BackusAníta BriemJohn GetzRacism collides with corporate greed when nine strangers - one of whom has a bomb - become trapped in a Wall Street elevator.
- DirectorSteve CarverStarsScott StraderPerry LangMariska HargitayThe coach of a college tennis team is given an ultimatum: put together a winning team, or else.
- DirectorPhilip D'AntoniStarsRoy ScheiderTony Lo BiancoVictor ArnoldA tough detective who is part of an elite New York City unit is trying to find out who killed his partner, but uncovers a plot to kidnap mobsters for money.
- DirectorPatrick McBreartyStarsTrish StratusFrank J. ZupancicBoomer PhillipsA hundred thousand dollar bounty or a million dollar execution? Choosing the former launches the heroes of BOUNTY HUNTERS into an all-out fight just to stay alive. The feature film debut of international fitness model Trish Stratus, BOUNTY HUNTERS is a sexy, action packed ride.
- DirectorRichard SchenkmanStarsBill Oberst Jr.Kent IgleheartRhianna Van HeltonWhile the Civil War rages on, President Abraham Lincoln must undertake an even more daunting task - destroying the Confederate Undead.
- DirectorJohn GulagerStarsNavi RawatKrista AllenBalthazar GettyPatrons locked inside a bar are forced to fight monsters.
- DirectorJohn McNaughtonStarsMichael RookerTracy ArnoldTom TowlesArriving in Chicago, Henry moves in with ex-con acquaintance Otis and starts schooling him in the ways of the serial killer.
- DirectorPaul MaslanskyStarsMarki BeyRobert QuarryDon Pedro ColleyWhen her boyfriend is murdered by mobsters, Sugar Hill decides not to get mad, but BAD. She asks the voodoo priestess Mama Maitresse to summon Baron Samedi, the Lord of the Dead, to help her gain a gruesome revenge. In exchange for Sugar's soul, the Dark Master raises up a zombie army to do her bidding. The bad guys who think they got away clean are about to find out that they are DEAD wrong.
- DirectorHarvey GlazerStarsJason MewesErica CoxRichard FitzpatrickA lovelorn paramedic rescues a woman left for dead after a deadly assault. When she refuses to go to the hospital, he takes her in, nurses her back to health and soon falls in love with her. Before long the mysterious woman suffers withdrawal symptoms, leaving the paramedic to believe his newfound love is a drug addict. Coming home to find a blood-drained corpse on his floor, he learns she does indeed have an addiction problem but it's not to drugs...
- DirectorMichael DowseStarsSeann William ScottJay BaruchelAlison PillLabeled an outcast by his brainy family, a bouncer overcomes long odds to lead a team of under performing misfits to semi-pro hockey glory, beating the crap out of everything that stands in his way.
- DirectorJulien NitzbergStarsJ. Parker Bazzle IIBig & RichPonty's CamperA year in the life of the White family, well known for Jesco White, the star of the "Dancing Outlaw" documentary.
- DirectorJon CassarStarsHulk HoganShannon TweedCarl WeathersPals Mike, Roy, Hunter and Derek, all ex-military, are now a bounty hunter team that also helps people in need. A woman whose rich ex kidnapped their kid hires them. Also, a chemical weapons expert who killed Mike's old team resurfaces.
- DirectorJoel SchumacherStarsMax GailAdam BaldwinMr. TThe misadventures of a group of unfortunate but streetwise cabbies working for a Washington, D.C., decrepit taxicab company.
- DirectorJonathan KesselmanStarsAdam GoldbergAndy DickJudy GreerAn orthodox Jewish blaxploitation hero saves Hanukkah from the clutches of Santa Claus' evil son.
- DirectorAndy SidarisStarsDarby HintonSybil DanningArt MetranoA womanizing private detective is assigned the task of investigating who is behind the hi-tech computer technology leaks to the Russians.
- DirectorJalmari HelanderStarsJorma TommilaOnni TommilaPeeter JakobiIn the depths of the Korvatunturi mountains, 486 meters deep, lies the closest ever guarded secret of Christmas. The time has come to dig it up. This Christmas everyone will believe in Santa Claus.
- DirectorCraig Ross Jr.StarsAngel VargasVera YellLee MarksThree youngsters encounter an evil clown.
- DirectorAnton CorbijnStarsSam RileySamantha MortonCraig ParkinsonA profile of Ian Curtis, the enigmatic singer of Joy Division whose personal, professional, and romantic troubles led him to die by suicide at the age of 23.
- DirectorTimo VuorensolaStarsJulia DietzeChristopher KirbyGötz OttoThe Nazis set up a secret base on the dark side of the moon in 1945 where they hide out and plan to return to power in 2018.
- DirectorKathryn BigelowStarsAdrian PasdarJenny WrightLance HenriksenA small-town farmer's son reluctantly joins a traveling group of vampires after he is bitten by a beautiful drifter.
- 20101h 56mNot Rated7.6 (1.9K)68MetascoreDirectorJohn ScheinfeldStarsGerry BeckleyLee BlackmanPerry Botkin Jr.The life and work of the enigmatic folk rock singer-songwriter.
- DirectorMichael PaseornekStarsJames MarshallChristina ApplegateFaye GrantRising rock star TJ Cray gets the shot of a lifetime: an audition with a A and R man. On the way into the city, a carload of drunks smashes into his car, severing his hands. He drops out of the business and becomes a homeless drunk. Cray wakes up to a pulsing beat in an abandoned warehouse, where a "rave" party is in full action. To his rescue comes Anamika, a computer artist, who takes him outside for fresh air. They become friends and eventually reinvent TJ's career. With help from friends, they replace his hands with prosthetics and design a metallic cyber-looking suit. TJ quickly becomes an overnight sensation known as Cyberstorm. The finale is a dramatic scenario where TJ must make crucial decisions about his new life.
- DirectorErnest R. DickersonStarsDMXDavid ArquetteMichael EalyA drug kingpin's return home touches off a turf war.
- DirectorJack HillStarsPam GrierBooker BradshawRobert DoQuiA sexy Black nurse takes vigilante justice against inner-city drug dealers after her sister becomes their latest victim.
- DirectorKeenen Ivory WayansStarsKeenen Ivory WayansBernie CaseyAntonio FargasIn this parody of blaxploitation movies, a black hero wannabe reunites former black heroes from the 70s to help him get revenge on Mr. Big.
- DirectorJack HillStarsPam GrierAnitra FordCandice RomanGrier and Haig are thieving mercenaries who engineer a prison break from the outside.
- DirectorRichard SchenkmanStarsDavid Lee SmithTony ToddJohn BillingsleyAn impromptu goodbye party for Professor John Oldman becomes a mysterious interrogation after the retiring scholar reveals to his colleagues he has a longer and stranger past than they can imagine.
- DirectorMark AtkinsStarsCorin NemecBrooke HoganVanessa EviganThe residents of a small town team up to kill a group of evolved sharks that can swim in sand, and are terrorizing local beaches.
- DirectorJames QuattrochiStarsJason GedrickDanny NucciMark BelascoNYC, 1972: After a bloody mob war all summer, the 5 mob families keep the peace at Sinatra Club with Gotti's upcoming silver heist as a joint venture.
- DirectorColin TrevorrowStarsAubrey PlazaMark DuplassJake JohnsonThree magazine employees head out on an assignment to interview a guy who placed a classified advertisement seeking a companion for time travel.
- DirectorHoward AvedisStarsAdam WestJohn AndersonAhna CapriAdam West stars in The Specialist as Jerry Bounds, an upright crusader standing up against the water company's efforts to exploit a local lake. John Anderson plays his opponent, Pike Smith, who at the start of the film smashes the glass out of a door at Bounds' law firm, to prove that "Nobody crosses Pike Smith and profits by it!"
- DirectorDaniel G. KarslakeStarsImogene RobinsonVictor RobinsonGene RobinsonAn exploration of the intersection between religion and homosexuality in the U.S. and how the religious right has used its interpretation of the Bible to stigmatize the gay community.