- [on Jimmy Fallon on "SNL"] ...laughing and all that dumb [bleep] he used to do. He wouldn't mess with me because I didn't [bleep]ing play that s--t. That's taking all the attention off of everybody else and putting it on you, like, 'Oh, look at me, I'm the cute one.' I told him not to do that s--t in my sketches, so he never did.
- You get somebody to crack a smile, that's a beautiful thing. So I think all comedians are earning their wings into heaven. We're all going to heaven, but everybody's not going to get their wings. Some people are just going to be regular angels. Doing cleanup, janitor work. In heaven, I'm going to sit on the couch with Oprah.
- [on growing up in the ghetto] The perception that our community is Oz (1997), that it's The Wire (2002), that's not how it always is in the 'hood. There's little girls jumping double-dutch, there's little boys playing skelly, opening up the Johnny pump. There's beauty there.
- [on his relationship with Tina Fey] I love her, because she helped me understand my voice, and helped me find who I was, and she's always encouraging me.
- [on the truck driver that crashed into his limousine in 2014] I forgave him and I'm not even mad at him no more ... But you know who is mad at him? All my white neighbors.
- [on how his grandmother felt after his 2014 automobile accident] Just like every other old black woman, all she cares about is education. So I said, 'Grandma, I made it. I'm alive.' She said, 'Good, now you can go back and get your GED.'.
- [on The Godfather (1972)] Sonny would have lived if they had EZ-pass.
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