- Oliver: [Escorting Grocer's Wife down the stairs from the bedroom] I've never been in a position like that before!
- [laughs]
- Oliver: But, it's certainly a pleasure to have seen you again.
- Grocer's Wife: Oh, it's my pleasure!
- Grocer: Did you hear me tell 'em, baby?
- Grocer's Wife: You sure did, daddy!
- Grocer: When I tell 'em, they stay told. No beatin' around the Busch with me.
- Grocer's Wife: That's right!
- [repeated line]
- Customer: How do you do?
- [walks out of L&H Electric Supply Co. carrying unpurchased goods as Stan and Ollie walk back in their store]
- Oliver: I remember you!
- Grocer: And I remember you too. Now get out of my store and stay out!
- Oliver: Oh, don't be like that. Let bygones be bygones. Let's help each other. You have a business, and we have a business. We'll send people to your store, and you send people to our store. What do you say?
- Grocer: You mind your business and I'll mind my business. Now get out before I throw you out!
- Policeman: [breaks up a fight between Stan, Ollie and Charlie] Just a minute. Don't you think this thing has gone far enough? Who started this anyway?
- Oliver: [he and Stan point to Charlie] He did.
- Grocer: I did not.
- Oliver: Why he did too. Why this little upstart, in the presence of my friend, slandered my character, for which I demanded an apology. He refused to give it, hence this petty little argument.
- Policeman: Slandered your character?
- Stanley: Yes, sir. He filtered his good name, didn't he?
- Policeman: Filtered his good name?
- Oliver: Why you know what he did? He accused me of a clandestine meeting with his wife.
- [Mae gasps]
- Oliver: For which I was wholly, and absolutely, innocent.
- Grocer: Then what were you doing coming downstairs with my wife?
- Grocer's Wife: Oh, what nonsense. There was nothing to it.
- Stanley: Nothing to it, Officer. He was waiting for a street car...
- Policeman: [to Charlie] Well it looks like you're to blame. You better apologize to this gentleman.
- Grocer: I will not.
- Policeman: Oh yes you will, or I'll run you in.
- Grocer: Well, alright. But don't let it happen again.
- Oliver: [They shake hands] No hard feelings.
- Oliver: Why don't you be more careful?
- Stanley: Well I didn't know he was on top of that thing.
- Oliver: Do you want us to be arrested before the customers arrive?
- Stanley: What time are they going to be here?
- Oliver: Why, they'll be be here about a half - "what time are they going to be here?" Why, customers come at any time!