George Washington Slept Here (1942)

Percy Kilbride: Mr. Kimber

Quotes 

• Connie Fuller : Darling, are you alright?

  Bill Fuller : Oh, fine. Fine.

  [looks around] 

  Bill Fuller : Well, at least nothing can happen for ANOTHER 17 years.

  [Both Bill and Connie fall into a boarded up well, followed by a big splash] 

  Mr. Kimber : [looking inside]  Mr. and Mrs. Fuller struck water! WHOOPIIIIEEEE!

• Mr. Kimber : And then there's the trees. We ought to start in doing something about the trees pretty soon.

  Bill Fuller : Just what are we supposed to do about the trees, Mr. Kimber, pay 'em for standing here?

  Mr. Kimber : You gotta spray 'em. You see, we got them elm trees over there. They're liable to get the elm blight. And the two oaks over by the house - they're liable to get the oak borer. This big willow, it's got a canker in it already. And of course, there's the tent caterpillar and the measuring worm.

• Connie Fuller : Well, I didn't know about the trees, Mr. Kimber.

  Bill Fuller : Oh, yes, Connie. You see, the measuring worm measures how much money you've got, gets in touch with Mr. Kimber, and pretty soon we're living in a tent with the caterpillars.

  Mr. Kimber : Then there's the Japanese Beetles. They'll be coming along July first.

• Mr. Kimber : [Bill, Connie, Uncle Stanley and Kimber are getting drunk on Kimber's hard cider when they're about to lose the house, and Kimber suddenly breaks out in deadpan off-key song]  "I'll never smile again, until I smile at you."

• Mr. Kimber : Oh, Mrs. Fuller, this is 1942, you know?

  Connie Fuller : Well, what about it, Mr. Kimber?

  Mr. Kimber : This is the year for the 17- year locusts to arrive.

  Bill Fuller : 17-year locusts? If you ask me, they're coming to see Mr. Kimber. He looks like one.

• Bill Fuller : Mr. Kimber, I have been begging you since July first to fix this screen. It's now the end of August. You're not that busy.

  Mr. Kimber : Mr. Fuller, every time you open the screen door, some flies get in.

  Bill Fuller : Oh, so it's my fault for coming into the house?

  Mr. Kimber : Well, it'd be better if you didn't.

  Bill Fuller : I see.

  Mr. Kimber : Well, I'll take a look at the screen.

  Bill Fuller : Yes. Look at it and watch the flies go in.

• Connie Fuller : [to Bill]  We own every bit of it: those trees, and the brook, and this house. 'Can't you see yourself coming down the road on an Autumn night, the smell of leaves burning?' Or coming in and lighting the fire and maybe it's raining outside. Why, Mr. Kimber, Bill doesn't appreciate those things, does he?

  Mr. Kimber : You're gonna need a cesspool, too, Mrs. Fuller.

• Bill Fuller : [stomping up the stairs]  Is it safe to walk up this thing in September, or must I install a ski lift?

  Mr. Kimber : Ain't had a good snowstorm in about... three years.

  Connie Fuller : You just wait until you see it a month from now when it's fixed up. We're going to do it all with local labor. Aren't we, Mr. Kimber? Mr. Kimber's going to superintend the whole thing. Can't you just see the possibilities?

  Bill Fuller : Connie, I don't see how you do it... or WHY!

• Mr. Kimber : Mr. Fuller, every time you open the screen door, some flies get in.

  Bill Fuller : Oh, so it's MY fault for coming into the house!

  Mr. Kimber : Well, it'd be better if you didn't.

  Bill Fuller : I see...

• Bill Fuller : Now, let me get this straight, Mr. Kimber. Every tree has to be sprayed, is that right?

  Mr. Kimber : Yes, sir.

  Bill Fuller : Well, who goes through the woods and sprays all of those trees? They seem to be doing all right.

  Mr. Kimber : I don't know, sir. All I know is trees gotta be sprayed.

• Mr. Kimber : Well, sir, we drilled down 40 feet and what do you think? We just struck mud.

  Connie Fuller : Mud?

  Bill Fuller : Well that's fine. Let's all go have a glass.

• Mr. Kimber : Let's see. We're going to need six truckloads of dirt.

  Bill Fuller : Now, just a minute, Mr. Kimber. If there's one thing this place has got, it's dirt. We are not going to buy any. Connie, we have no water. All right. But now to find that we've got no dirt. That's too much.

• Bill Fuller : Mr. Kimber, I don't wanna seem peevish, but isn't eight hours a day enough for that well drill?

  Mr. Kimber : The more I drill, the closer I get to water.

  Bill Fuller : Well, will you please stop for a while.

  Mr. Kimber : Well, all right. But that water ain't lookin' for us. We're lookin' for the water.

• Bill Fuller : Mr. Kimberrrrr?

  Mr. Kimber : I ain't drillin.'

• Connie Fuller : Mr. Kimber, must you the grass right now. It seems to me, you're always cutting the grass.

  Mr. Kimber : Well, I gotta cut it some time.

  Connie Fuller : Well, don't do it now, please

  Mr. Kimber : All right, but it'll just keep on growing.

• Mr. Kimber : Get away from that, Bossy! Excuse me, Mr. Fuller. My cow is trying to get into your car.

• Bill Fuller : No locusts, no worms, no beetles?

  Mr. Kimber : No, sir. Termites. Doing a lot of damage in the barn.

  Bill Fuller : When they're headed this way, let me know. I want to hide my tennis racket.

• Mr. Kimber : Well, things come, things go.