Arsenic and Old Lace (1944)

Jean Adair: Martha Brewster

Photos 

Quotes 

• Mortimer Brewster : Look, you can't do things like that! Now, I don't know how I can explain this to you. But, it's not only against the law, its wrong!

  Martha Brewster : Oh, piffle!

  Mortimer Brewster : It's not a nice thing to do. People wouldn't understand. He wouldn't understand. What I mean is... Well... This is developing into a very bad habit!

• Aunt Martha : For a gallon of elderberry wine, I take one teaspoon full of arsenic, then add half a teaspoon full of strychnine, and then just a pinch of cyanide.

  Mortimer Brewster : Hmm. Should have quite a kick.

• Reverend Harper : Have you ever tried to persuade him that he wasn't Teddy Roosevelt?

  Abby Brewster : Oh, no.

  Martha Brewster : Oh, he's so happy being Teddy Roosevelt.

  Abby Brewster : Oh... Do you remember, Martha, once, a long time ago, we thought if he'd be George Washington, it might be a change for him, and we suggested it.

  Martha Brewster : And do you know what happened? He just stayed under his bed for days and wouldn't be anybody.

• Mortimer Brewster : Look, Aunt Martha, men don't just get into window seats and die!

  Abby Brewster : We know, dear. He died first.

  Mortimer Brewster : Wait a minute! Stop all this. Now, look, darling, how did he die?

  Abby Brewster : Oh, Mortimer, don't be so inquisitive. The gentleman died because he drank some wine with poison in it.

  Mortimer Brewster : How did the poison get in the wine?

  Martha Brewster : Well, we put it in wine, because it's less noticeable. When it's in tea, it has a distinct odor.

  Mortimer Brewster : You mean, you... You put it in the wine!

  Abby Brewster : Yes. And I put Mr. Hoskins in the window seat, because Reverend Harper was coming.

  Mortimer Brewster : Now, look at me, darling. You mean, you mean you knew what you'd done and you didn't want the Reverend Harper to see the body?

  Abby Brewster : Well, not at tea. That wouldn't have been very nice.

  Mortimer Brewster : Oh, it's first-degree.

  Abby Brewster : Now, Mortimer, you know all about it and just forget about it. I do think that Aunt Martha and I have the right to our own little secrets.

• Martha Brewster : [about the men they have poisoned]  Let me see, now. This is eleven, isn't it, Abby?

  Abby Brewster : Oh, no, dear. This makes twelve.

  Martha Brewster : Abby, dear. I think you're wrong. This one is only eleven.

  Abby Brewster : No, dear, because I remember when Mr. Hoskins first came in, it occurred to me that he'd make just an even dozen.

  Martha Brewster : But, Abby, dear. I really don't think you should count the first one.

  Abby Brewster : Oh, I was counting the first one, and that makes it twelve.

  Martha Brewster : It does? Well, she's probably right. Abby usually is. I get them mixed up sometimes.

  Mortimer Brewster : Makes it twelve? Twelve.

• Mortimer Brewster : But there's a body in the window seat!

  Aunt Abby : Yes, dear, we know.

  Mortimer Brewster : You know?

  Martha Brewster : Of course!

  Aunt Abby : Yes, but it has nothing to do with Teddy. Now, Mortimer, you just forget about it. Forget you ever saw the gentleman.

  Mortimer Brewster : Forget?

  Aunt Abby : We never dreamed you'd peek.

  Mortimer Brewster : What the...?

• Martha Brewster : [to Mortimer]  One of our gentlemen found time to say "How delicious"!

• Mortimer Brewster : Now look, darling, how did he die?

  Abby Brewster : Oh, Mortimer, don't be so inquisitive. The gentleman died because he drank some wine with poison in it.

  Mortimer Brewster : Well, how did the poison get in the wine?

  Martha Brewster : Well, we put in wine because it's less noticeable. When it's in tea it has a distinct odor.

• Mortimer Brewster : What is this? Did everybody in Brooklyn know I was going to get married except me?

  Martha Brewster : We knew you'd find out about it in time.

• [after finding the dead body in the window seat] 

  Mortimer Brewster : But - what happened to him?

  Martha Brewster : [cheerfully]  He died.

• Martha Brewster : Are you leaving, Doctor?

  Dr. Einstein : Yes, please.

• Jonathan Brewster : We're moving the car behind the house. You'd better get to bed.

  Martha Brewster : The car is alright where it is until morning.

  Jonathan Brewster : I don't want to leave it in the street. That might be against the law.

• Martha Brewster : [Mortimer is about to leave, but has Mr. Witherspoon's hat on]  Hmm! Hmm!

  Mortimer Brewster : What, hmm hmm?

  Martha Brewster : The hat!

  Mortimer Brewster : [Notices hat and throws it on the ground]  Argh!

  [slams door]