Jack and the Beanstalk (1952)

Bud Abbott: Mr. Dinkel, Mr. Dinkelpuss

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jack : [about the Princess]  We gotta save her.

  Mr. Dinkelpuss : You're right.

  Jack : There's the castle. Let's go.

  Mr. Dinkelpuss : Come on. What am I doing? Go ahead.

• Chorus : [singing]  Jack and the beanstalk, we'll always remember when / He chased up the stalk and killed a giant in his den.

  Mr. Dinkelpuss : I managed this boy.

• Polly the Housekeeper : [Polly, Jack and Dinklepuss enter the castle]  I'll show you what you're supposed to do.

  Mr. Dinkelpuss : Yeah, you show me, and I'll show him.

  Patrick the Harp : Make the little fat one work till his back breaks. How I love the sound of cracking bones.

  Jack : You're a bad harp, and you're gonna have a bad ending.

  Patrick the Harp : Sticks and stones, sticks and stones!

  Polly the Housekeeper : Alright blabbermouth, into the cupboard you go!

  [Takes the harp over to the cupboard and starts putting him inside it] 

  Patrick the Harp : Don't you dare put me in that dark cupboard again! Don't you dare! A thousand curses on you, and I'll have me revenge! Come back to Erin, Mavourneen, Mavourneen! A thousand curses on ya...

  [Polly closes the cupboard doors] 

• Patrick the Harp : [the giant just entered the castle dining hall, carrying a bag filled with jewels]  And a good "Good Morning" to ya master!

  The Giant : Good morning, harp. Housekeeper, housekeeper!

  [Polly enters as he's emptying the bag onto the table] 

  The Giant : Where's my breakfast?

  Polly the Housekeeper : On the way.

  The Giant : And bring me my favorite hen.

  Patrick the Harp : What, heaven forbid, do you see in that white feathered biddy?

  The Giant : Golden eggs, Patrick. Solid golden eggs!

  Polly the Housekeeper : [Jack enters the room, pushing a grill, wearing a chef's hat and apron. Polly whispers in his ear]  The cells are unlocked and I put the keys back.

  Patrick the Harp : They're whispering master! What're they whispering about?

  [Jack sneers at the harp] 

  Jack : Oh, I hate him.

  Polly the Housekeeper : Please take care of yourself.

  [Exits the room] 

  Jack : [Musing to himself]  I think she's worried. She cares for me.

  The Giant : Where's my breakfast?

  [Looking over the jewels] 

  Patrick the Harp : Beautiful they are, but can they bring you happiness?

  [the giant finds a very small one and tosses it on the floor] 

  The Giant : How'd that little one get in here?

  [Getting impatient] 

  The Giant : Where's my breakfast?

  Mr. Dinkelpuss : You heard the giant!

  [Picks up the jewel the giant tossed and looks at it through a magnifying glass] 

  Mr. Dinkelpuss : Can I help you put them away?

  The Giant : Can I trust you?

  [Begins putting the jewels back in the bag] 

  Mr. Dinkelpuss : Eh, why, what a ridiculous question.

  [the giant grabs him by the shirt and repeats the question] 

  The Giant : Can I trust you?

  Mr. Dinkelpuss : Well frankly, no...

  The Giant : [Polly has come back, carrying a hen. The giant takes it from her and starts petting it]  My jewel of jewels!

  Patrick the Harp : My jewel of jewels. What can she do that I can't do?

  The Giant : [Looks over at the harp]  Can you lay a golden egg?

  Patrick the Harp : I shudder at the thought.

  The Giant : [Lays the hen down on the table]  Show him how talented you are. Lay hen, lay!

  [after a moment it lays a golden egg, the giant picks it up] 

  Patrick the Harp : It's only gold.

  The Giant : It's my main source of wealth.

  [to Polly] 

  The Giant : Take her away.

  [to Dinkelpuss] 

  The Giant : You!

  Mr. Dinkelpuss : Y-yes, sir?

  The Giant : I like a dishonest man, who admits it. Carry these jewels back to the vault. She'll show you where it is.

  Mr. Dinkelpuss : Yes, sir.

  [Takes the bag and leaves with Polly]