The Female Animal (1958)

Hedy Lamarr: Vanessa Windsor

Photos 

Quotes 

• Vanessa Windsor : If I have to do this once more, I'll have you deported back to Siberia.

  Mischa Boroff : Helsinki, Madam. Helsinki. Remember? Basically, I'm a Finn.

  Vanessa Windsor : Okay, go to Helsinki! I'm going to lunch.

• Vanessa Windsor : Help me undress.

  Chris Farley : What?

  Vanessa Windsor : [shows off her bracelets]  Diamonds may be a girl's best friend; but, they get heavy as lead after a couple of hours.

• Vanessa Windsor : Welcome to Windsor Castle.

  Chris Farley : To where?

  Vanessa Windsor : My own private little club.

• Chris Farley : How does one get elected to the club?

  Vanessa Windsor : Well, you've been elected.

  Chris Farley : Oh, well, is there an initiation ceremony?

  Vanessa Windsor : Yes. But, later.

• Vanessa Windsor : What would you have to drink?

  Chris Farley : Oh, I had something great the other day. French 75.

  Vanessa Windsor : Oh, well, that's wonderful! What do you need?

  Chris Farley : Brandy, champagne, a little gin.

  Vanessa Windsor : Oh, you'll make it. Huh?

• Vanessa Windsor : As long as you're in this house, you're going to behave like a lady. And not like some - little tramp!

  Penny Windsor : Tramp? You're full of funnies tonight. Tramp? From you? The great lady. The great star. Who's rolled in every gutter in...

  Vanessa Windsor : [slaps Penny]  Now, I didn't mean that. Honey, I'm sorry. I just wanted you to have the chance in life I never had. I had to do it the hard way.

• Neighborhood Boy : Hey! I know you! You're on TV!

  Vanessa Windsor : Hasn't your mother taught you not to say that naughty word?

• Neighborhood Boy : Hey, Chris! There's a dame to see ya!

  Vanessa Windsor : Hey - Lady.

  Neighborhood Boy : Lady.

• Lily Frayne : Life can be so boring. I adore the clean, limbed American type too. Somehow, I always end up with veal scallopini in sideburns.

  Vanessa Windsor : Leaping to conclusions again, Lily?

  Lily Frayne : What else is there to leap at, except, men?

• Vanessa Windsor : I've got to call the papers. This story I think should go to Hedda.

• Vanessa Windsor : Penny, darling, here's someone I'm very anxious for you to meet. Chris Farley. This is my wonderful daughter Penny.

  Chris Farley : Hi.

  Vanessa Windsor : I wanted you to get together for a long time; but, now, since we're going to be a family...

  Penny Windsor : Family?

  Vanessa Windsor : Yes. Chris and I are going to be married.

  Penny Windsor : What?

  Vanessa Windsor : I want you two to love one another as much as I love both of you.

• Chris Farley : Can a guy be in love with two woman at the same time?

  Vanessa Windsor : No. No. And when these things happen, sooner or later, you find out one of these two loves is the real love. And the other just infatuation or - sex!

• Vanessa Windsor : My love for you is real. And the feeling we have for one another is real. It doesn't matter what happened. It's what's going to happen that matters.

• Vanessa Windsor : Oh, Chris. Chris, there is no use trying to escape it. There'll never be any other woman in your life but me. I'll see to that. Just you and me - and - Penny, of course. You and me and Penny.

• Vanessa Windsor : All my life, in order to get things, I had to be, let's call it, determined. And sometimes, just because one is determined, one clings to the things that are really over.

• Vanessa Windsor : It's hard for me to give up anything. People grow up at different ages. I'm sort of a delayed case.

• Nurse : Miss Windsor, maybe I shouldn't say this; but, well, I've always felt that you were a much better actress than the roles they gave you.

  Vanessa Windsor : Well, thank you. That's very kind of you.

  Nurse : Cause the one great thing you have on the screen is believability.

  Vanessa Windsor : Believability. Oh, I hope so. I certainly hope so.