- Soldier Singer: It was Christmas Day in the cookhouse, the happiest time of the year, Men's hearts were full of gladness and their bellies full of beer, When up popped Private Shorthouse, his face as bold as brass, He said We don't want your Christmas pudding, you can stick it up your... tidings of co-omfort and joy, comfort and joy, o-oh ti-idings of co-omfort and joy. It was Christmas Day in the harem, the eunuchs were standing 'round, And hundreds of beautiful women were stretched out on the ground, Along came the big bad Sultan, and gazed on his marble halls, He said Whaddya want for Christmas boys, and the eunuchs answered... tidings of co-omfort and joy, comfort and joy, o-oh ti-idings of comfort and joy.
- Sir Edward Grey: [as war breaks out] The lamps are going out all over Europe, we will not see them lit again in our lifetime.
- [to a stretcher case with a bandaged head]
- Nurse: Don't worry. We'll soon have you back at the front.