Whew! John Holmes(Mr. Porno himself) stars as a vampire inhabiting an old, house(looks like it might have been condemned) when a group of horny men and women crash in and relieve themselves of their pent up desires. Holmes tries his hand at comedy in this one with some atrocious one-liners. Thankfully for us he did not pursue a career in comedy. This film is an exercise in tedium. It has next to nothing to do with vampirism except for Holmes spouting some vampire-like crap in the beginning of the movie and Holmes becoming a skeleton at the end. Sandwhiched in between is one soft-core sex scene after another. One guy, one girl. Two girls. One guy, two girls. One guy, three girls. Two guys, four girls. One vampire, four girls. None of the proceeding are very interesting and the viewer will find an eager desire to fast-forward through the whole thing. A cheap, unimaginative sexploitation film in every way.
4 Reviews
Holmes Playing a Vampire
Michael_Elliott3 December 2016
Sex and the Single Vampire (1970)
** (out of 4)
A group of horny swingers want to "make it" at a haunted place so they go into this old house not knowing that Count Spatula (John Holmes) is there.
SEX AND THE SINGLE VAMPIRE is a rather strange film that's not hardcore yet it's a little rougher than softcore or what you'd typically expect someone like Something Weird Video to release. SWV did release a softer version that ran just twenty-seven minutes but I'm reviewing the full 55-minute version.
Basically, as you'd expect, there's no real story to speak of. For the entire running time we see the various swingers messing around with one another but there's no actual penetration. I said this film was a bit rougher than your typical softcore picture and that's because we get a lot of close up action of male and female frontal nudity. We get really up close shots of the women's private areas and so much more details than what you'd get in a softcore picture. There's also a lot of kissing and touching "around" the parts but never actually on the parts.
The main draw to the picture will be Holmes who I must admit was rather funny as the Count. I really liked him in the earlier scenes where he's freaking out over the lack of blood in the house. The majority of the middle section has him just peeping in on people but he does get a chance to play a second character as well. The rest of the men and women are decent enough in their parts but for the most part this here didn't require acting.
** (out of 4)
A group of horny swingers want to "make it" at a haunted place so they go into this old house not knowing that Count Spatula (John Holmes) is there.
SEX AND THE SINGLE VAMPIRE is a rather strange film that's not hardcore yet it's a little rougher than softcore or what you'd typically expect someone like Something Weird Video to release. SWV did release a softer version that ran just twenty-seven minutes but I'm reviewing the full 55-minute version.
Basically, as you'd expect, there's no real story to speak of. For the entire running time we see the various swingers messing around with one another but there's no actual penetration. I said this film was a bit rougher than your typical softcore picture and that's because we get a lot of close up action of male and female frontal nudity. We get really up close shots of the women's private areas and so much more details than what you'd get in a softcore picture. There's also a lot of kissing and touching "around" the parts but never actually on the parts.
The main draw to the picture will be Holmes who I must admit was rather funny as the Count. I really liked him in the earlier scenes where he's freaking out over the lack of blood in the house. The majority of the middle section has him just peeping in on people but he does get a chance to play a second character as well. The rest of the men and women are decent enough in their parts but for the most part this here didn't require acting.
Early John C. Holmes!
filmbuff197417 February 2007
Warning: Spoilers
I saw this film as part of the Satanic Sickies Box Set #1 set.What I have learned from this collection so far is that the 1970's era of erotica left much to be desired.At least in the early 1970's.
Sex and the Single Vampire would have been another disappointment if it hadn't been for the appearance of John C. Holmes as Count Spatula. A very low budget film probably shot in one day over someone's house. A group of swingers arrive at the home of the uncle of one of the swingers.Unknown to the nephew is uncle is a vampire who is hiding in the household basically watching all the sex action going on until he becomes so frustrated that he decides to tie up all the men in the basement and then seduce all the women.It ends with Count Spatula forgetting to go back to his coffin after his night of his orgy whereas he turns into a skeleton.
The actors in this leave much to be desired but I have to say that I disagree with the other reviewer about John C. Holmes comedic talents.The truth is John C. Holmes does have good comic timing and is actually not a bad actor! This film is recommended for John C. Holmes fans who want to see his early work before he became the legend that we know today.If you are looking for an erotic film then this is not the place to look.There is absolutely no hardcore sex in this feature at all.All of the sex scenes are simulated and look simulated.Sex and the Single Vampire is strictly for die hard John C. Holmes fans.
Sex and the Single Vampire would have been another disappointment if it hadn't been for the appearance of John C. Holmes as Count Spatula. A very low budget film probably shot in one day over someone's house. A group of swingers arrive at the home of the uncle of one of the swingers.Unknown to the nephew is uncle is a vampire who is hiding in the household basically watching all the sex action going on until he becomes so frustrated that he decides to tie up all the men in the basement and then seduce all the women.It ends with Count Spatula forgetting to go back to his coffin after his night of his orgy whereas he turns into a skeleton.
The actors in this leave much to be desired but I have to say that I disagree with the other reviewer about John C. Holmes comedic talents.The truth is John C. Holmes does have good comic timing and is actually not a bad actor! This film is recommended for John C. Holmes fans who want to see his early work before he became the legend that we know today.If you are looking for an erotic film then this is not the place to look.There is absolutely no hardcore sex in this feature at all.All of the sex scenes are simulated and look simulated.Sex and the Single Vampire is strictly for die hard John C. Holmes fans.
Enjoyable soft-core horror porn comedy trash
Woodyanders4 May 2015
Warning: Spoilers
A group of horny swingers decide to crash at the ramshackle abode of vampire Count Spatula (lanky legendary 70's porn stud John Holmes sporting powdered gray hair).
Director Modunk Phreezer keeps the silly story moving along at a snappy pace and maintains an amiable tongue-in-cheek tone throughout (the count is afraid of mice and an amusing running gag has the bumbling bloodsucker constantly stepping on mouse traps that are scattered all over his dilapidated home). F.N. Spelling's blithely inane script trots out such endearingly creaking clichés as the rundown house in the middle of nowhere and the whole thing transpiring on your proverbial dark and stormy night. The gals are all real hot and pretty; it's always a pleasure to see the ever-yummy Sandy Dempsey getting naked and naughty. Moreover, the sex scenes are quite raunchy and energetic (if obviously simulated), with a lesbian threesome providing the definite scorching highlight. Sigfried Von Wanghunt's funky-griding score hits the get-down groovy spot while the rough cinematography by Jose Wrecks does the trick. Good dippy fun.
Director Modunk Phreezer keeps the silly story moving along at a snappy pace and maintains an amiable tongue-in-cheek tone throughout (the count is afraid of mice and an amusing running gag has the bumbling bloodsucker constantly stepping on mouse traps that are scattered all over his dilapidated home). F.N. Spelling's blithely inane script trots out such endearingly creaking clichés as the rundown house in the middle of nowhere and the whole thing transpiring on your proverbial dark and stormy night. The gals are all real hot and pretty; it's always a pleasure to see the ever-yummy Sandy Dempsey getting naked and naughty. Moreover, the sex scenes are quite raunchy and energetic (if obviously simulated), with a lesbian threesome providing the definite scorching highlight. Sigfried Von Wanghunt's funky-griding score hits the get-down groovy spot while the rough cinematography by Jose Wrecks does the trick. Good dippy fun.
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