"The Golden Lady" had the potential to be better than it is: sort of an R-rated, politically-conscious "Charlie's Angels", except that the girls are 4 not 3, and they're not even necessarily "good" - they're just industrial spies-for-hire who offer their services to the highest bidder, no matter what country he comes from. Unfortunately, paceless direction (check out that overlong disco number in the middle) and a jumbled script prevent the movie from realizing that potential. The women are pretty good-looking, but they're not given much of a personality - in fact, you'll struggle to even remember their names. The most memorable scene in the movie is a cameo by Desmond "Q" Llewelyn! *1/2 out of 4.
5 Reviews
Larraz does Bond, kind of
BandSAboutMovies21 July 2022
Warning: Spoilers
Post-Moonraker, there seemed to be an interest in creating new Eurospy ripoff movies like The Nude Bomb; No. 1 of the Secret Service (I realize it came out in 1977) and its sequels Licensed to Love and Kill and Number One Gun. The Golden Lady literally says in its ads that it's a female James Bond; most curiously it was directed by horror and sex film fiend José Ramón Larraz from a script by Joshua Sinclair, who went from working in Calcutta with Mother Teresa to making Marlene Dietrich's last movie Just a Gigolo, writing Keoma and making 1985's Shaka Zulu.
Julia Hemingway (Ina Skriver using the name Christina World, already famous from her love scene with Koo Stark in The Awakening of Emily; she was also in episodes of Space: 1999 and The New Avengers) has been hired by a millionaire named Charlie Whitlock (Patrick Newell, the Mother spymaster of The Avengers) to destroy his competition in the oil fields of Saudi Arabia.
The film also decides to up its Eurospy cast by having Q himself, Desmond Llewelyn, appear as a mentor to our heroine and, you knew it, give her a few gadgets.
Julia is helped by three agents who in every way are to remind us of Charlie's Angels: the tech-savvy Lucy (June Chadwick, Lydia from V and Dolby mispronouncing Jeanine Pettibone in This Is Spinal Tap), military superwoman Dahlia (Suzanne Danielle, who shows up in The Wild Geese and Carry On Emmannuelle as Emmannuelle) and supermodel and nymphomaniac - it says so right on her file! - Carol (Anika Pave, who had a cameo in The Spy That Loved Me and was also in Confessions of a Window Cleaner). They're joined by a pneumatic lady of the evening named Anita (Ava Cadell, who is in the Andy Sidaris films Do or Die, Hard Hunted, Fit to Kill and Return to Savage Beach as Ava, who goes from an evil hitwoman to a good agent of L. E. T. H. A. L. and a DJ/sex therapist who does her radio show from her hot tub; she is literally a woman made for Andy Sidaris films) who uses her orgasmic yelps and gyrations to flummox their enemies.
The girls come up against industrialists like Dietmar Schuster (comedian Dave King) and his bisexual henchman Wayne Bentley (Richard Oldfield, who shows up as one of the rebels in Empire Strikes Back) as well as Greek shipping tycoon Aristotle...I mean Yorgo Praxis (Edward De Souza, who is also in The Spy That Loved Me) and finally, Julia's ex-lover Max Rowlands (Stephan Chase).
Also, Hot Gossip - a British dance group who backed Sarah Brightman on her single "I Lost My Heart to a Starship Trooper" and also sang "Making Love on a Phone" - appear. They were also on The Kenny Everett Video Show and even recorded a second album - Geisha Boys and Temple Girls - that was produced by Martyn Ware (Human League/Heaven 17) with one song, "I Burn for You," written by Sting. Several of the members of this dance band went on to bigger things, like video queen Bunty Bailey (who is also in Spellcaster and Dolls), Bruno Tonioli of Dancing with the Stars, Perri Lister (who sang the French parts in Billy Idol's "Eyes Without a Face" and part of the Blitz Kids with Boy George, Steve Strange, Spandau Ballet and Marilyn; she's also the mother of Idol's son Willem Wolf Broad) and the aforementioned Brightman.
Girl group Blonde on Blonde - made up of Page 3 girls Nina Carter (who was married to Rick Wakeman for a while) and Jilly Johnson - also are in this and on the soundtrack. They were big in Japan and best known for their disco cover of Led Zeppelin's "Whole Lotta Love."
Somehow, despite glitz, fashion, disco and spying, this movie makes me wonder how and why this movie's producers - Sinclair, Keith Cavele (he produced Queen Kong), Paul Cowan (The Crying Game) and Jean Ubaud (who moved on to make The Burning, Tag: The Assassination Game and Terminal Choice after this) - picked Larraz to make an action movie, a genre he'd never attempted before nor will he try again. The Spanish Eurosex and horror standout would later say that Sinclair "couldn't write a letter home to his mother let alone a script."
Julia Hemingway (Ina Skriver using the name Christina World, already famous from her love scene with Koo Stark in The Awakening of Emily; she was also in episodes of Space: 1999 and The New Avengers) has been hired by a millionaire named Charlie Whitlock (Patrick Newell, the Mother spymaster of The Avengers) to destroy his competition in the oil fields of Saudi Arabia.
The film also decides to up its Eurospy cast by having Q himself, Desmond Llewelyn, appear as a mentor to our heroine and, you knew it, give her a few gadgets.
Julia is helped by three agents who in every way are to remind us of Charlie's Angels: the tech-savvy Lucy (June Chadwick, Lydia from V and Dolby mispronouncing Jeanine Pettibone in This Is Spinal Tap), military superwoman Dahlia (Suzanne Danielle, who shows up in The Wild Geese and Carry On Emmannuelle as Emmannuelle) and supermodel and nymphomaniac - it says so right on her file! - Carol (Anika Pave, who had a cameo in The Spy That Loved Me and was also in Confessions of a Window Cleaner). They're joined by a pneumatic lady of the evening named Anita (Ava Cadell, who is in the Andy Sidaris films Do or Die, Hard Hunted, Fit to Kill and Return to Savage Beach as Ava, who goes from an evil hitwoman to a good agent of L. E. T. H. A. L. and a DJ/sex therapist who does her radio show from her hot tub; she is literally a woman made for Andy Sidaris films) who uses her orgasmic yelps and gyrations to flummox their enemies.
The girls come up against industrialists like Dietmar Schuster (comedian Dave King) and his bisexual henchman Wayne Bentley (Richard Oldfield, who shows up as one of the rebels in Empire Strikes Back) as well as Greek shipping tycoon Aristotle...I mean Yorgo Praxis (Edward De Souza, who is also in The Spy That Loved Me) and finally, Julia's ex-lover Max Rowlands (Stephan Chase).
Also, Hot Gossip - a British dance group who backed Sarah Brightman on her single "I Lost My Heart to a Starship Trooper" and also sang "Making Love on a Phone" - appear. They were also on The Kenny Everett Video Show and even recorded a second album - Geisha Boys and Temple Girls - that was produced by Martyn Ware (Human League/Heaven 17) with one song, "I Burn for You," written by Sting. Several of the members of this dance band went on to bigger things, like video queen Bunty Bailey (who is also in Spellcaster and Dolls), Bruno Tonioli of Dancing with the Stars, Perri Lister (who sang the French parts in Billy Idol's "Eyes Without a Face" and part of the Blitz Kids with Boy George, Steve Strange, Spandau Ballet and Marilyn; she's also the mother of Idol's son Willem Wolf Broad) and the aforementioned Brightman.
Girl group Blonde on Blonde - made up of Page 3 girls Nina Carter (who was married to Rick Wakeman for a while) and Jilly Johnson - also are in this and on the soundtrack. They were big in Japan and best known for their disco cover of Led Zeppelin's "Whole Lotta Love."
Somehow, despite glitz, fashion, disco and spying, this movie makes me wonder how and why this movie's producers - Sinclair, Keith Cavele (he produced Queen Kong), Paul Cowan (The Crying Game) and Jean Ubaud (who moved on to make The Burning, Tag: The Assassination Game and Terminal Choice after this) - picked Larraz to make an action movie, a genre he'd never attempted before nor will he try again. The Spanish Eurosex and horror standout would later say that Sinclair "couldn't write a letter home to his mother let alone a script."
Cheap n' cheerful
heedarmy7 May 2002
Upon its (short-lived) UK release, the makers of this film boasted that it introduced a "female James Bond". Not likely, on a budget of £1m - on most Bond movies, that's probably the catering bill!
Still, the film does throw everything into the pot. There's sex, gory murders, some fairly tame action sequences and a "blink and you'll miss it" walk-on for Desmond Llewellyn, presumably to tie in with the Bond theme. Oh, and the theme music is catchy.
Still, the film does throw everything into the pot. There's sex, gory murders, some fairly tame action sequences and a "blink and you'll miss it" walk-on for Desmond Llewellyn, presumably to tie in with the Bond theme. Oh, and the theme music is catchy.
Incredibly poor
Leofwine_draca20 January 2023
THE GOLDEN LADY is a clunking misfire from Jose Ramon Larraz, the Spanish director whose work in the UK included the minor classic VAMPYRES. Sadly, this one's at the other end of the quality spectrum, a supposed female-led Bond spoof that feels more like a weak spin on CHARLIE'S ANGELS. Some minor female talents of the era (including a face you may recognise from CARRY ON EMMANNUELLE) are employed by a wealthy businessman to take care of some business, but are soon double-crossed. Desmond Llewellyn has a tiny cameo, Edward de Souza should know better, and the Three Degres and Blonde on Blonde are involved. The film is incredibly poor and long scenes seem to be shot through a kaleidoscope so you have no idea of what you're suppoesd to be looking at.
Enjoyable 'femme fatale' movie
BFE-419 September 1999
I have no recollection whatsoever of the plot since I have not seen it since it came out but the female good guys led by Christina World take on the bad guys in some good action sequences. Enjoyable but lightweight thriller.
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