- [Wanting to have sex with Joyce]
- Professor Carl Mason: Come on, let's do it on the table.
- Joyce: I told you, the table's too hard!
- Professor Carl Mason: No it's not!
- Joyce: Oh, that's easy for you to say, I'm the one on the bottom!
- Joyce: [after the professor she is sleeping with pretends to not know her in front of his wife] I'm gonna bust his balls tonight.
- [the police are investigating a murder in a movie theater]
- Detective Len Gamble: Frank, why'd you get me out of bed for this one?
- Det. Frank Daley: She was getting married, Len... next week.
- Detective Len Gamble: I bet it's him.
- Det. Frank Daley: No, wait, wait. Don't jump to any conclusions. It might be a coincidence.
- Detective Len Gamble: Coincidence?
- Det. Frank Daley: Yeah.
- Detective Len Gamble: No, Frank, he's back. He giving me a second chance.
- Amy: Ralph?
- Ralph: Yeah?
- Amy: Is it worth it?
- Ralph: Huh?
- Amy: Well, getting married, I mean.
- Ralph: Get dressed, kid.
- [beat]
- Ralph: I'll tell you the truth, though. Sometimes I wish I never got married. But other times, I wouldn't trade Roz for anybody. Heh. Marriage is like that. Good times, bad times. You learn to live with it. But it's better than being alone.
- Detective Len Gamble: What do you have?
- Detective Thompson: A tailor, murdered with a pair of scissors.
- Detective Len Gamble: Does anyone else work here?
- Detective Thompson: The dead guy's wife.
- Detective Len Gamble: Find her; she may be able to help.
- Detective Thompson: And what are you going to be doing?
- Detective Len Gamble: Sleeping, I've had a long drive!
- Detective Thompson: You're a big help!
- Father McKenna: I know a lot of people who have been married for years and they are still having second thoughts.
- Amy: That's encouraging.
- Father McKenna: But they should have never been married to begin with. They just made bad decisions and picked incompatible mates.
- Amy: You trying to tell me something, Father?
- Father McKenna: Me? No. I don't meddle. I just want you to be sure.