Making Mr. Right (1987)

John Malkovich: Jeff Peters, Ulysses

Photos 

Quotes 

• Frankie Stone : For reasons I can't go into and you don't wanna know about, I have to go to this wedding, and I need a date, and you'd be the exact, perfect guy. Now, this isn't a proposition; I just wanna know if you might think about maybe going with me.

  Jeff Peters : A wedding? I don't know; I'm not very good with people.

  Frankie Stone : Oh, they're not people, they're just my family.

• Ulysses : It takes a man this sensitive to know your needs!

• Jeff Peters : That woman is turning you into a hooker!

• Ulysses : If I were human, Frankie, it would be simple: I would fall in love with you.

• Jeff Peters : I knew it! One minute with a woman and he short circuits.

• Frankie Stone : [seeing Ulysses for the first time]  My God, he looks like you!

  Jeff Peters : What did you think he'd look like? An erector set?

• Jeff Peters : Miss Stone, if I have unwittingly lead you on, I sincerely apologize.

  Frankie Stone : Don't flatter yourself. I hate men.

• Ulysses : Jeff taught me to massage the body part when I have a spasm in my mechanism.

• Ulysses : What was that?

  Frankie Stone : A kiss. People kiss when they like each other. It's a sign of love or affection. Although, in my case, maybe I'm going nuts.

• Frankie Stone : [after seeing Ulysses impressive anatomically correct naked body]  I just don't understand why Jeff felt it was necessary to give you that - um - thing.

  Ulysses : Jeff felt it would give me confidence.

• Jeff Peters : Haven't you ascertained by now that I have no desire in pursuing intimate relations with you?

• Station Wagon Driver : [sees Ulysses walking on the side of the highway]  Hey dude, are you alright?

  Ulysses : [shows driver the invitation]  I'm going to a wedding.

  Station Wagon Driver : [looks at the invitation]  That's way the hell in Miami Beach, my man!

  Ulysses : Are you going way the hell in Miami Beach, my man?

• Frankie Stone : Oh, hi. You must be Dr. Peters. I'm Frankie Stone.

  Ulysses : What do you call these?

  Frankie Stone : What?

  [Ulysses grabs her breasts and she pushes him away] 

  Frankie Stone : What? Look, you've been in this lab too long, buddy!

  [in walks Dr. Peters] 

• Jeff Peters : As you can see, we licked that problem.

• Frankie Stone : Why are you starring at me like that?

  Ulysses : Because, you taught me to and because I think you're attractive. I think you're the most attractive woman I know.

  Frankie Stone : I'm the only woman you know.