User Reviews

"Janek: Terror On Track 9" is the 5th installment in the 7 film Frank Janek series, all broadcast by CBS starring Richard Crenna from 1985-1994. This 1992 outing finds Janek, two years after his last appearance, still with the NYPD but no longer directing the Internal Affairs Dept. Essentially Janek is still one of the Dept's top detectives but he isn't ferreting out corrupt cops anymore. The basic plot is a serial killer, apparently a woman based on appearance, is killing people via lethal injection in Grand Central Station. Many of the regulars from the first four films are not present here, although Cliff Gorman is back as wisecracking partner Aaron Greenberg. Joe Campenella takes over the role of Police Chief, no easy task when a family member of his becomes one of the victims.

Complicating the investigation aside from the lack of credible witnesses is nosy TV reporter (Joan Van Ark) who seems to be first on the scene, film crew in tow, every time a murder takes place. Swoozie Kurtz plays FBI agent Marcia Hobbs from the Behavioral Anaylsis Unit (BAU, like on the TV show "Criminal Minds") brought in at the behest of the beleaguered Police Chief to assist/run the investigation. Things get complicated when Hobbs tries to pin the killings on a suspect she's been chasing cross country, despite Janek's protests that he doesn't fit the profile of the killer in this case. Greenberg also makes waves accidentally spilling confidential case info in an attempt to romance Van Ark's intrepid reporter. All of this puts the Dept on the public hot seat and prompts Janek to seize control of the investigation away from the FBI (though Hobbs still assists him). Along the way Hobbs and Janek grow closer, bonding over their failed marriages.

For the most part this is a well paced film with enough believable twists and turns to keep you interested, much like the previous films in the series. The ending however, at least the manner in which Janek stumbles upon the killer (who up to this point hasn't done anything to make themselves a suspect) is a bit of a stretch, and the killer's meltdown, reminiscent of a split personality disorder, would have been better served with more time spent on the killer's background and some prior evidence of the disorder. Aside from what seems like a rushed ending, the movie is enjoyable, and at least up until the part, well written. The rushed ending detracts a bit however and leaves this entry, while entertaining, a step below the previous films in the series. As always, Emmy Winner Crenna excels as Janek, the quintessential tough guy with a softies heart. Gorman is good as well although he isn't used as much here as in previous installments.

Typical made for t v movie from back in the day! Before AMC and HBO the old big three ABC, NBC and CBS made t v movies on the cheap! Today, Breaking Bad, the Walking dead etc have movie budgets, but the old movie of the week was made fast and cheap. Terror on Track 9 is watchable once but nothing memorable. What works there is mystery which keeps the viewer watching. A love interest etc. What does not work. Cliche, and formulated scrips makes Terror on Track 9 another cheap a fast t v movie. 4 stars.

...but you will find a deranged Joan Van Ark giving a hilarious campy performance as a psychopathic serial killer! Contains spoilers Bodies start turning up dead all over the city of New York. Well actually, just near a train station in New York (Track 9), hence the title of this telemovie. The victims are females and the cause of death has been determined that each victim was stabbed with a syringe filled with heroine causing them to O.D. At each crime scene, the victim lies dead with a halo of glitter sprinkled around their heads.

Enter Richard Crenna as the police detective assigned to track down the killer. From witness reports and evidence, the killer appears to be a female dressed as a hooker who goes by the name 'Jazelle'. Enter Joan Van Ark as a nosey television reporter who always manages to arrive on the scene before every other reporter to ask Richard Crenna annoying questions about the murders.

Figured out who the killer is yet?

Halfway through this gem of a telemovie, Crenna unearths juicy information about the serial killer. In what could be one of the most over-acted performances of all time, a wig-maker tells Richard Crenna that the halo of glitter around the victims' heads suggests that the killer seeks 'fame and glory'. Crenna puts two and two together and eventually ends up at the residence of the serial killer's parents who turn out to be Amish farmers. The mother shows Crenna a picture of her 'daughter' who ran off to the 'big city' years ago. Her name was "Lorali" and she apparently used to carouse about their local hometown with various men if ya get my drift.

At this point, Crenna seems to have figured out who the killer is and he returns to the Big Apple to weasel her out. He enters the television studios where Joan Van Ark is in the middle of anchoring the 6 o'clock news and exposes her as 'Jazelle'. In what could be one of the campiest performances of all time, she goes through both her multiple personalities on-air (reminiscent to Joanne Woodward's performance in "The Three Faces Of Eve") whereupon she is arrested by security after confessing to the murders. And if that scene wasn't enough, when the security guard manhandles her to the ground, she screeches, "NOBODY TOUCHES JAZELLE!", and up go the credits.

This was actually a very amusing telemovie. I'm sure it wasn't intended to be a comedy - but c'mon - this is Joan Van Ark playing a schizophrenic serial killer here. Give her some credit!

9/10

This movie could have been sexier! Wasted Joan again!!!

SPOILERS!!! This movie is about a serial killer who is killing people (mostly homeless women) all over grand central station. The sex bomb and hotter than the sun, Joan Van Ark stars as a noisy reporter who seems to have all the inside details of the story. In the start of the movie they show a hooker-looking person putting on red plastic leather mini skirt and jacket and 20 inch heels and filling a vile with liquid cocaine, it turns out to be Joan! She does this sexy amazing low hooker voice and says nobody touches jezel! These producers once again wasted Joan's hotness. She goes to the one police guy's apartment for dinner and he would have loved to have sex with her (even the guy who worked at the corner selling apples knew she was a hot amazing wonder), but the bird butt writers had her leave his apartment to go kill another homeless women instead of grace our eyes with a sex scene!! They should all be arrested!! I would have dreamed of a sex scene with Joan and that guy where Joan takes off her jacket and skirt to reveal a sexy bra and underwear, making sure she is in full view of the camera to show the worlds sexiest body and have us all have panic attacks from her sex appeal!!!!! Then she should have danced around for the guy because at the start of the movie, he asked her if she used to be a dancer and she said yes. If they did a scene with Joan dancing in a sexy, barely there bra and a thong, I would die and go to heaven! They missed lots of opportunities! And they never showed her face as the hooker, arrest them all. I obviously need to be a writer/producer and create my own movies to cast Joan in so that she isn't wasted and all of the world can get what we are craving, some sexy scenes with Joan!!!!!!!!!! This movie only contained a suggested, but never really showed sex scene between Richard Crenna and Swoosie Kurtz, WHO CARES ABOUT EITHER OF THOSE NON SEXY PEOPLE IN A SEX SCENE!!?!?!?! Enough said bird butt dumb producers who have no more business being producers than rats!