Mad TV (TV Series 1995–2016) - Alex Borstein as Various, Ms. Swan, Charlotte York, Sue Napersville, Miss Swan, Patsy Ramsey, Björk, Bunny Swan, Chelsea Clinton, Eracist Player Anne, Ethel Mertz, Ethel from 'I Love Lucy '98', Funeral Guest, Heather, Joyce DeWitt as Mary Pippen, Judge, Karen, Kenny's Country Broasters Customer, Lisa Kushell's Mother, Meadow Soprano, Ms Swan, Ms. Swan, Mama Brightling, Natalie Merchant, Roadkill Lunchmeat Megapress Daughter, Rosie O'Donnell, Santa's Helper, Self, Spishak Cola Taster, Vera

DMV Worker : Now turn and face the camera.

Ms. Swan : Live from New York...

DMV Worker : No! That's the wrong show.
Ms. Swan : He look-a like-a man.
Salesman : [to female co-worker] Haha, take it like a man.

Ms. Swan : [to same woman] Yeah, you look like you take it like a man.
Ms. Swan : Yeah, okay, I tell you everything.
Police Officer : Was he a black man or a white man?

Ms. Swan : You know... black-a like you, black-a like me.
Mrs. Campbell : That is so awful for your father to be dying of cancer. It's just horrible. Now... can I ask you a question? Was he a smoker?

Daughter : Um, yes. Yes, he was.

Mrs. Campbell : Well then I just don't understand how he could be surprised. I mean it says it right there on the side of the box, doesn't it? "Smoking Causes Cancer." I know 'cause I've seen it on there. Now... can I ask you a question? Can your father read?

Daughter : Of course he can read!

Mrs. Campbell : Well, I just thought maybe he was illiterate and that was why he was surprised when he got cancer. Because it does say right there on the box...
Ms. Swan : [everyone dances to Dancing Queen, and everything freezes] What the hell?
Stuart Larkin : Where's Mr. Pip's goo-goo?

Various : His what?

Stuart Larkin : His goo-goo. His goo-goo's not there.

Various : I'm sorry, I don't understand...

Doreen Larkin : Well, he's talking about his goo-goo, his ding-a-ling, duh!

See also