The War at Home (1996)

Lane Smith: Marjorie's Husband

Photos 

Quotes 

• Uncle Howe : [Bob is cutting the turkey]  Listen, Bob, if you hold that knife right here, then you get a better-

  [attempts to guide Bob's hand, and the knife cuts Bob's hand] 

  Uncle Howe : Oh, oh, I'm sorry there, Bobby!

  Bob Collier : [mutters to himself]  Why don't you carve the goddamn turkey yourself, you old fart!

  Uncle Howe : [is surprised]  Uh, what's that?

  Bob Collier : [looks Howe squarely in the eye]  I said why don't you carve the goddamn turkey yourself, you old fart!

• Uncle Howe : I always say, you give me forty-five minutes and a Bible and I can prove conclusively that Noah's Ark could not have been in Turkey!

  Brenda : Oh, he can.

  Maurine Collier : I should study my Bible more.

  Uncle Howe : Well, it had to be somewhere, now, I don't know where exactly, well, I'm not up on it like I should be. But somewhere in the Alps.