Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998) Poster

Nick Marcq: Charles

Quotes 

  • Winston : Charles, why have we got that cage?

    Charles : Uh, security.

    Winston : That's right, that's right, security. So what's the point in having it if we're not goin' fucking use it?

    Charles : Well, I would've used it but this is Willie and Willie lives here.

    Winston : Yes, but you didn't know it was Willie until you opened the door, did you?

    Willie : Chill, Winston, it's me. Charlie knows it's me. What's the problem?

    Winston : The problem, Willie, is that Charles and yourself are not the quickest of cats at the best of times. So just do as I say and keep *the fucking cage locked!* What is that?

    Willie : That's Gloria.

    Winston : Yes I know that's Gloria, what's that?

    Willie : Fertilizer.

    Winston : You went out six hours ago to buy a money counter and you come back with a semi-conscious Gloria and a bag of fertilizer. Alarm bells are ringing, Willie.

    Willie : We need fertilizer Winston.

    Winston : Mmmhmm. We also need a money counter. This money's got to be out by Thursday, I'm buggered if I'm gonna count it. Just make sure if you do need to buy sodding fertilizer you could be a bit more subtle.

    Willie : What do you mean?

    Winston : We grow copious amounts of ganja, yah? And you're carrying a wasted girl and a bag of fertilizer. You don't look like your average horti-fucking- culturalist! That's what I mean Willie.

  • [Discussing their careers as marijuana growers] 

    J : I've a strong suspicion we should have been rocket scientists, or Nobel Peace Prize winners or something.

    Charles : Peace Prize? Ooh. Be lucky to find your penis for a piss, the amount you keep smoking.

See also

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